Dealing With Cravings

[firefish]

I've been clean from vicodin for over 4 months now and clean from tramadol for almost a full month (over 4 weeks).  I had gotten to the point where I am feeling great, and even my chronic pain is tolerable.

However, this morning I woke up with such a craving for that old high, to feel that nice glow of happiness as the vicodin settled into my bloodstream.  It was scary; I thought i was through with that.  There wasn't any of the physical symptoms such as the ache in the shoulders, the tight neck, the headache and the RLS type stuff that goes on, but I did feel a strong need for that buzz again.

Nothing helped, including my old standby crutch, OTC Benedryl.  I even drove the Vette to work today, usually something that makes me break out in major grins.

Finally I logged on to this forum, and read a few posts.  Whoa.  I feel fine now.  Yep, some of y'all scared the **** out of me.  

It's amazing what happens when you put things into perspective.  Thanks to you all.  I know some of you out there are really hurting, but please know you helped a fellow addict today and kept him from doing something really dumb.  God Bless you.  

[firefish]

Thanks!  I was away from computers >gasp!< for the weekend so didn't know if anyone posted to this topic or not.   I appreciate the words and will check out PAWS.

And you are right, the craving did go away.  It repeated this morning, but not as intense and a good cup of coffee from Starbucks seemed to sooth the beast.  I think th emornings are the worse because that's when I feel the worse pain wise.  My wife says me getting out of bed in the morning is like an old train leaving the station:  lots of creaking, groaning, huffing and puffing.  I used to be able to pop a vicodin on my way into the shower, and by the time I was done I was bouncing around happy as a clam.  

The neat thing is now I still do the same thing.  It was the hot shower that got me going, not the vikes.  

[gizzy32]

It could also be a stretch of PAWS and you can read up on that in the health pgs in the top right. I know i went through 2 bouts of PAWS and relapsed once. It's worth looking into. Good luck

[gizzy32]

I am so glad that craving passed and they always do. Although they do diminish with time and usually not as intense, they still happen well after being clean. I am not sure they ever totally disappear and that's why it's important to never let your guard down. It's almost like another switch is turned on in our brains and somehow we need to shut it off again. I had to work very hard and learn how to get through cravings for cocaine and turn that switch back off. You did the right thing coming on and posting and talking about it.

Congrats on your clean time:)

[cathy5841]

glad you were able to get through the craving...they get farther apart and are not as intense as time moves on...keep on keepin on!!!