Please help me I'm terrified!

[Stewartsangel]

Ok I have not been on here in awhile. I'm currently 19 weeks pregnant. I have two children. I have been trying to taper off of vicodin for about 3  months now. Not with very much luck. I'm weak. I was hoping to not have to tell the  dr and just taper to quit. It's not working my warped brain always finds an excuse. I'm terrified. I have decided to cone clean to the dr tomorrow at my appointment. I know I need help and I can't do this myself. I do not have a prescription. Does anyone know what I might expect? I have thought of rehab but can not go until my job ends in five weeks. I have a certain image I have to obtain. I am worried they might call cps and I may jeopardize  my two older children. I want to come clean for the sake of my family and especially the child inside of me! I am so worried that they are going to call the authorities. Any advice I'm in Texas help me please!

[4WendyJ]

I am so happy for you. Yeah!!!!  May God bless. WendyJones

[Stewartsangel]

I feel so much better, somehow stronger! And is a girl who is perfectly healthy! Yay!

[Rain4Lafleur]

I am glad you found the courage to tell your doc.  Compassion is usually shown to those who ask for help.  
I do not know what your job is.  If you are in the medical field, the licensing board will look upon you with understanding and support if you seek help, which you are doing through your doc.  Your doc is now prepared to help you in every way he/she can.  And the baby will be ok after birth thanks to you getting help.  It is extremely distressing to see a newborn suffering withdrawal...
God bless you and your family.  Please do not talk to multiple people around you.  It only adds to confusion and you do not need judgment.
Glad you got on this forum.  You will find much caring and support here.  

[dominosarah]

Way to go on telling the doctor and i am thrilled to hear she is supportive!!  You have a good plan in place now.  We are here to support you so lean on us~~sara

[Stewartsangel]

Ok just left the doctor! So glad I picked such an amazing doctor! Very understanding! Tapering for the next few weeks then rehab ASAP. I need all the support I can get!

[kahopes]

Have you thought about NA?  That may help you to begin to share and open up about your fear for your baby and yourself, and may give you the strength to talk to your OB or another professional in order that you get the help you need for yourself and your baby.  You are not weak, the "disease" has the best of you right now.  I know it's hard to think about but getting the assistance you need to break free somehow, someway from its hold will be best for you first then your baby.  It's not too late...Take care.

[dominosarah]

Please come clean to your OB.  If you dont and they find out once the baby is born CPS will be involved.  Do this for you, your unborn child and the babies you have at home~~~

[Stewartsangel]

Okthank you everyone I feel a little more confident about the morning I will  post tomorrow and let you know........

[Stewartsangel]

Thank you! But i really can't expose myself to my job. It would be very detrimental to my life. And I can't afford to not be there and have no pay. :( I'm mostly worried about CPs I adore my family and have no idea how I got here. I figure I have to turn myself in now or face being caught. I have gone from about 10 a day to three a day I just can't seem to go any lower than that. I'm so worried :(

[4WendyJ]

It is WendyJones again.  I understand more where you are coming from.  If you trust you OB doc then please confide in Him/Her.  Going cold turkey will harm the baby.  Your doctor can help you monotor the safety of the baby and will know the best plan for you.  The only way CP's will get involved usually is if you go through your whole pregnancy and the baby is born addicted.  This can work out OK.  

[annabelle825]

Sorry I want to give you my advise. I would talk to your doctor about a treatment plan.   Each person is different and each person may need a different program to get them clean.  For me I chose Suboxone, however I will admit that it has saved my life in the aspect that I don't want or take vics anymore, but it too is very very addicting.  I am preganat now and am taking it, i am due in two weeks and am soo worried about my son having WD's after his birth.  I've been reading up on the topic and its a 50/50 chance that he could have WD at birth.  Most of the studies are done with methadone babies.  

The other opition is the taper off which would be the very best thing to.  Cut back before your child is born.. and lastly is to try methadone..

Nothing is for certain, but I do know that taking the vics for me, was more dangerous than getting on the suboxone.  I have a long road ahead still as once my son is born i plan on getting off the suboxone.  I was lucky with my son Jacob as I did take Vics with him (not as many as I was before I got help) and he had no WD symtoms.  However each baby is different so I don't want you to thinks its ok to take the VICS, the best thing you can do is GET OFF the pills.  The other thing you don't want to get yourself into is that you are so dependant on the opioid that you try to quit cold turkey as this could cause alot of stress for you and your unborn child.  Get help now while your early on in your pregnancy.

[annabelle825]

If you don't mind me asking, how many vics are you taking a day?  I too am a addict to the VICS and I finally got some help back in Sept.  At the time I was taking 20 pills a day (tens or 750) and I just got sick and tired of being hooked on them.  I also took vics while preganat with my son but not that many.. but enough to make myself worry that he would be born addicted

[Stewartsangel]

Thank you! But i really can't expose myself to my job. It would be very detrimental to my life. And I can't afford to not be there and have no pay. :( I'm mostly worried about CPs I adore my family and have no idea how I got here. I figure I have to turn myself in now or face being caught. I have gone from about 10 a day to three a day I just can't seem to go any lower than that. I'm so worried :(

[4WendyJ]

Hi there.  What an ordeal.  I can feel your panic from here.  First of all, take a deep breath and settle down.  I really think you know the answer here.  I am here for you to go through things with you. You are not alone, OK?  First of all,  your life is not in jeopardy here but your unborn baby's life is in the balance.  You need to come clean with your doctor tomorrow and ask for rehab. immediately.  Your image has to be honest and nothing but.  Keeping up appearances for the sake of others has to go out the door.  That thinking will only get you into more trouble.  I really have no idea of the ramifications of your actions.  I have been an addict and I understand all too well what you are going through.  You have to come clean and be honest. Let the chips fall where they may.  Get down on your knees and pray for guidance and forgiveness. I will pray for you also.  Keep sobriety as top priority in your life.  Find a program and work it.  I chose AA and it saved my life.  Your life will turn around for the better.  You can do it my dear.  You have more inner strength than you realize. I am here for you also. Love to you,  WendyJones