Finally a week down

[Spentshells]

Today is my first week clean!!! I have to say that it felt like the longest week of my life!!! Haha! I really have to thank everyone on here for the constant support! If I hadn't found this site, I don't think I would have had the strength to make it this far!

It seems like all the physical effects are finally over, except for the insomnia. This has been my biggest hurdle to over come. I tried melatonin and another sleep aid, but that really didn't help at all. The last thing I wanna do is get dependant on something to fall asleep. I feel like the lack of sleep is the driving force of thinking of the pills. But don't worry, my faith and will are strong to keep clean!!!

Thanks you all again so much!!! God bless!!

[loveJwhite]

I had a relapse this past weekend too...and today I would have been one month clean from opiates..just keep counting clean days and try not to beat yourself up....I'm in a world of guilt and disappointment too. You can do it!

[Spentshells]

Thanks all!

I feel so stupid about yesturday! I do feel like it had to happen to me for some reason though. The way I felt after I took the pill, wasn't one of relief, it was disappointment. I honestly felt worse after I slipped than during the wds! I'm glad a got rid of the rest of them and I now know I never want to cause myself that pain again!!

[gnarly_1]

HEY Shells.....sorry to here you relapsed ....its more of a mindscrew then anything else
try  not to pick up the guilt and shame that often go with it....get up dust yourself off and move forward with this thing....you need to plug into some form of aftercare ....I know we beat this drum a lot but it is the only known long term cure to addiction it dosent guarantee you wont relapse but it gives you a fighting chance not to...the statistic show that only 10% of the people will make it to a yr clean without aftercare it shouldn't be considered optional it will help you relearn the very way you think we all need to as addicts get your self set up for success this next time around...try putting as much effort into aftercare as you did into active addiction and I think you will find your solution here good luck and God bless.....Gnarly    

[gizzy32]

What caused the slip up? Relapses happen, but they don't have to. Can you break off your contacts for getting them? Hope your staying clean, "just for today". Keep posting, we are here for support

[Spentshells]

I slipped up today :(

Got a hold of 10 today and ended up taking 2. I am so disgusted with myself right now! I got so mad at myself and flushed the rest....

So again, I'm starting day 1

[Addict63]

Congrats on your 1 week clean!! I've recently been through what you're going through and "longest week" is a great description.

You mention: "The last thing I wanna do is get dependant on something to fall asleep."
You are so right on that statement also. Keep your sleeper unmolested if possible. Try not to use anything.

Along with Opiates, I had been on Ambien for a year. It turned out the Opiate cold turkey WD was nothing compared to the Ambien WD. It was amazingly painful, tedious and nightmarish withdrawal. The Ambien mfg never mentions how bad the WDs really are. It took me 4 months to taper off of Ambien. I discovered the hard way that when we take something for sleep we borrow sleep from our future. Paybacks are tough.

If you do decide to use something for sleep, Melatonin is about the only substance that doesn't really cause rebound insomnia, as far as I know. There are also lots of different herbal sleep aids that contain Chamomile and Valerian Root. I liked Yogi Tea, which has a small amount of Valerian along with a bunch of other relaxing herbals. Good for short term use.  Valerian uses the brain's GABA receptors; the same receptors as Benzos. I'd stay away from large amounts of valerian to avoid rebound insomnia, even in short term use.

again, congrats and keep on keeping on!  

[gizzy32]

Way to go on a week clean and glad to hear most of the physical w/d's are over. Sleep and energy always seem to take longer, but it will come, getting clean is a big adjustment to our bodies. Keep your guard up and keep getting support. Congrats again:)