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Avatar universal

Hey guys

I saw my surgeon today and burst into tears telling him I am a drug addict and he laughed at me. I am a police officer and cant be on drugs when I go back to work in 3-4 months. He  quit laughing at me and said " You just had two major surgerys in five months and the last one was as bad as getting hit buy a forklift!, (I WAS ONLY REALLY ON A CONTINOUS BASIS USING  OXYCOTIN AND OXYCODONE FOR ABOUT 3 MONTHS FOR PAIN NOT TO GET BUZZED, NEVER ANY CRAVINGS OR HEY I JUST WANT ONE, I GUESS IN THE THREE MONTHS I AVERAGED MAYBE 60MG A DAY, I RELIZED I WAS ADDICTED WHEN MY FOOT FELT OKAY ENOUGH NOT TO EVEN BOTHER THINKING ABOUT THEM, A HOUR OR TWO THEN I STARTED SHAKING AND ANXIETY AND I FELT LIKE HELL, I TOOK A OXYCOTIN AND FELT PRETTY GOOD STILL MINOR ANXIETY AND SHAKING...THEN I THOUGHT OF **** I AM ADDICTED ) you were on alot of meds, okay first off addicts dont admit to being addicted to there doctor and no one who has ever left my office became one, stop being a ***** and listen to me. Your doing one oxycodone 5mg pill every 6 hours??? down from 10mg every 4, plus oxycotin 10mg 2 times a day. Of course your sick and cant sleep, your system is out of whack and your scaring yourself to death. I will help you wean! Chill out." I felt better almost instantly. He put me on this every six hours (1) 5mg pill, the next 6 hours (2) 5mg pills the next six hours (1) 5mg pill. the next six hours (2) 5mg pills...for 7 days then I repeat these steps every 7 hours for 7 days. then 8 hours so on. I hope this works and I gave my mother all my pills. I dont get cravings and if a miracle cure for oxycodone was found I still wouldnt take them in fact looking at the pills make me sick in my stomach. I hate myself for not sucking up the pain in the beginning and am glad I told on myself before its to late, and if this wont work...I am going to inpatient rehab! I will not let this ruin me and if I am sick for three months while tapering then good, if I do get a craving later in life or a day after I am clean of the little white devils RENEMBER THIS ****! My only fear is going into full withdraw I am TERRIFIED of just the thought of it. I dont mind not sleeping, a LITTLE anxiety, trembling, a mild non stop headache 24-7 is fine with me, hell a good bout of diarrea cleans you out, I prefer to vomit actually. But deep depression noooo way, and aches and pains I can live with that, just the MIND part of the withdraw scares me.
4 Responses
Avatar universal
Did you consider tapering?  It seems like you have the willpower to do that and you would be in control. My taper lasted 3 weeks and I was good after that...over 14 months ago.  My situation was similar to yours...it happens to many, many people; dependent w/o realizing.

Take Care...you'll be OK.

Guy
486507 tn?1237242081
wtg on wanting to stop, you deff. sound like you have the want to and thats huge in itself. I wish you the best of luck and remember GOOD PEOPLE can get caught by the power of a pill.
739175 tn?1286940430
You can calm down and don't freak out. Your body has become dependent on the OC. After a duration of about 2 weeks your body has created a need for the OC just like if you don't eat you get hunger pains until you eat. Its your bodies way of saying hey i need this. The slow taper will still have WD but not as intense as if you go CT. Just like the rest of us you got a taste for it and now you have to train your body to reject that. I will tell you it won't feel great and a slow taper will take some time you just have to get the right mindset don't let them get the best of you. check out the thomas recipe in the health pages things like exercise get the endorphins going, amino's & vitamins, hot baths, and posting here when you get the urge or have a question. There are a lot of good people here who have a lot of knowledge on the subject. just remember it happens to the best of us and to anyone on them for an extended period.

If ya need anything let me know

good luck and god bless

joe aka slapperman
401095 tn?1351391770
and u have no prior addictions in the past?  just seems u just relived wds from ur past n ur post...and u r right...people r afraid of the wrong part of this whole thing/the physical part..scare themselves into a hole so deep they can not get out of it..and the whole time/the fear is over nuttin worse than a really bad flu in most cases..the real hard part/for me and many/is the dead gum depression that follows later..and the lack of nrg...exercise helped me out of this hole as i was literally working and melting into the couch...i know u feel less afraid..and follow that plan he gave u..but dont make the mistake of thinking u r not addicted/cos it sounded like u r...being a,lil bit afraid can be a good thing..just not when the fear paralyzes u...and that fear takes u deeper into the darkness that u were afraid of in the first place
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