Time flies when you're having fun! Cliche, but SO true! It's been 44 days since I did my taper and 40 days *totally* clean! It's been amazing!! After the sucky w/d's were over (ya know how that goes! LOL) I have been just amazed with life. I must say I have traded it for another addiction.....keeping my body healthy! :o) Great foods in my fridge all at my disposal, vitamins every day, running two online stores & a wonderful little side job just to get out of the house for sanity & I've been reconnecting CONSTANTLY with old friends that are awesome influences and people to have in my life. Even my relationship has improved so immensely!
My motto lately has been "Everything around us is made up of energy. To attract positive things in life, start by giving off positive energy. Remember..Like begets like!" It's SO true. Some wonderful things have been happening in my life just by giving out the "good" to whoever may need it. In turn it's been bleeding into other aspects of my life. I've had awesome opportunities for my business to grow and was just accepted into an annual artist festival (my first year applying..which is rare!!) that I'm gearing up for this August.
My dogs have gone from thinking I'm insane to being insanely in love with their "new" daddy.....and they've gotten used to me blaring music daily while I dance around the house, cleaning and taking care of everything (my god...my house has NEVER looked this good!!). LOL They're no longer plotting my demise....I think our mountain hikes did the trick! ;o)
Now don't get me wrong....there have been up and down days. If one of those rare down days start to creep in I just tell myself that it's only temporary and then I take a good look around my environment, my head, and all the great things I DO have to be grateful for. If that doesn't work I have a "Happy Music" playlist and I boost up my vitamin B complex. As I've stated in earlier posts......while you're in the lousy withdrawal stage, it's a perfect time to REALLY think about triggers and how you plan on coping with them WHEN they come up (because they will...that's just life). Your after-care is SO vital to being and STAYING clean!!
My biggest accomplishment.....I was actually faced with my DOC. It was offered to me by a family member when I mentioned my back was hurting. She doesnt' know about my issues (she's very old and prone to stressing about, well, anything she can stress about so as a family we decided not to tell her) ...anyway...she pulled out those little white pills I used to love so much. Without so much as a thought I said "No....I have healthier things that will help & I'd rather not put that in my body". Can I just tell you how AMAZING that felt?! Right then I realized how much control I have over my choices. I was able to say "no" to the one thing in my life that once had the biggest control over me and I took it back! I get tingles just thinking about it and can't help but smile.
Sorry for this long post, but I just hope that maybe someone in their earlier stages will read this and pray that it might get them through whatever it is they might be going through. LIFE IS WONDERFUL! You can't truly live it unless you are in control and not some substance. We all have it in us to make our life the life we DESERVE. Not to sound all religious-y or whatever, but....we are all miracles...simply put. How can we deserve anything less than an amazingly wonderful life? Everyone of you is my thoughts whether I know you are not. I send blessings out to everyone daily that whoever may be struggling, like I once did, will get through their hard time and come out the other side and truly see how awesome they are and that they truly deserve a clean and happy life. Anyway....I'll stop now. I hope you all are doing great!! Much love....