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Avatar universal

Holy cow! This is beyond torture

Truly sorry for the back to back posts but this is beyond anything I ever expected.  My mind is going crazy, body is on fire and I hurt all over and I'm guessing this is the only way out.  Holy cow... I never expected to feel this bad. I think I could handle the physical wd's...it's the mental wd's that are pure torture.  Hoping someone has some guidance for me. Right now I don't think I have what it's going to take but will give it my best.
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4522800 tn?1470325834
I just responded in your other post.
If you can, try to stick to one post right now. It gets too hard to follow. We will see if you come back with a new issues. OK?
Thanks
Vickie
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Hi.....well I often say this is 1/3 phyical and 2/3 mental you have to be ready to fight it out on both fronts...try to keep a positive attitude it makes the difference between being uncomfortable and suffering.....suffering is a choice  pick up a case of gatoraid and force the fluids  try not to watch the clock.....just turn on the telly or the radio and get your mind off how lousy you feel.....I have said this a million times  ''but you just got to be ok without being ok for a wile''  this to shale pass....just know this all that your going threw is going to be worth it to not be chained to a pill bottle....keep posting for support
...............................Gnarly.......................
Helpful - 0
2107676 tn?1388973859
What is going on in your mind?  Are you anxious about what's to come or are you craving?   Maybe both?
Helpful - 0
10287982 tn?1443815735
Hey!

I have some help! I totally understand how you're suffering mentally. That is how the cunning, baffling and powerful addiction is trying to manipulate you into relapsing. Do not pick up. No matter what. You will feel better.

When you were five or six, did you ever have a nightmare and wake up convinced you were in terrible danger? That is precisely the chemical reaction that addiction produces during withdrawal. You need to keep telling yourself: my brain is under an onslaught of stress hormones. I am not in my right mind. This will pass. This will pass. Reality is absolutely nothing like you are feeling, and you will come back, providing you just don't pick up no matter what.

Stick up for your inner six year old for a change. Tell your addiction, thanks for sharing but no thanks. Be gone, before someone drops a house on you! (Wizard of Oz reference never hurts....)

If you feel the inner courage missing, fake it! It's the only way! And, as soon as you can, find a meeting. Your addiction wants you alone, where you are most vulnerable. Fight! Fight for your life!
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Thanks for all the replies and supportive words. This is going to be a much bigger fight than I thought.
Helpful - 0
7163794 tn?1457366813
COMMUNITY LEADER
When I needed to get "out" of my head is when I put the earbuds in and blasted music....positive, upbeat, music which did help. I also found a meditation cd that helped.  Watching funny comedians which forced me to laugh (laughed and cried b/c I felt so ******!!!) but it did help!  I couldn't lay down, couldn't get up, just wanted to curl up in a ball....of which I did many times.  I screamed into my pillow....I talked to myself, alot,.....but honestly, I found music helped the most!  Sitting in the sun also helped with mood.  Taking the Vit C emergen C packs high in Vit C helps also.  My kids made me a basket of **** to do while I was down and sick of which drove me insane b/c I would start something, even as trivial as coloring and then would go beserk and put it down!  Just hold tight while on this roller coaster b/c it will end, I promise......BUT DON'T EVER FORGET IT!
Helpful - 0
15290316 tn?1447023108
Hey. How are you doing? Still hanging in there? Feel free to post tonight. We're here for you. Because you're still in the beginning stages, you may not sleep very well for the next couple of days.  I have insomnia, so I'm on here all hours of the night if you need someone to talk to. :)
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Oakieaddicted I just sent you a pm
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Hi to everyone.  It's day 2 and 4:10am in Oklahoma and I cant sleep.  My skin feels like its on fire, my body hurts all over and my mind is going crazy.  All of this and i have to go to work in a few hours.  How in the world am I going to get through this?

I know I dont have a choice but to go through this torture but the minutes seem like hours and the days seem like months.  I cant lay down and it takes all the energy I have just to get up off the couch or out of bed.  

How long do the physical symps last?  From what I've read is 3-5 days.  Is that right?


Helpful - 0
10287982 tn?1443815735
That's right. You should start to turn a corner on day 4. Might still feel symptoms in waves for a few more days, but not as bad. Look at it this way: is this awful enough never to endure again?
Helpful - 0
4522800 tn?1470325834
I know this is easier said then done!!!  BUT try to re-direct yourself from thinking about this..Just take it min by min and day by day and real soon you will be way behind a week and up perking like a coffee pot!
Well, maybe not as perking as you did get, but it will be way better clean and with it, then not!!

Did you ever read what we all said in the post minutes/hour before this one that was put up after?

Just hang in, you will get better and better, but try NOT to ride on it in your Head!

Cheering YOU on All the Way.
Bless
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Hey  congrats on day 2  your doing the deal....I always recamend renting a bunch of movies it will give you something to do wile your up all night most people dont sleep for a wile....try to take a hot soak right b/4 bed use epsom salt in it...a hot soak will help with the body aches and it will also calm your nerves....as you can see it is often the mental ''mindscrew'' that is the biggest issue  as soon as your up to it get out to a N/A meeting....there you will have some where to share where the people will understand  this is a critical part of recovery and the support you get there is priceless keep posting for support where all here for you  may God be with you
.............................................Gnarly.............................................
Helpful - 0
1198664 tn?1368647812
The worse you feel now the bigger your relief moment will feel. You should be close to feel something good. My first WD it was around three days, when I eventually moved from pills to H it was on day 7 before I felt it.
It will be short live tho just as a warning. Like someone said its like waves. And you will still feel like garbage for a few weeks at least. Just not that intense body burning mind bending stuff. It's weird but whenever I had my ahhhhhh finally some relief moment I was watching/listening to music on my TV.  Then it was back to feel bad, but just not as bad.
Best move obviously is just to roll with it. Or end up like me jumping to H, something I swore I would never do. I make good money and live in the subs. Trust me it gets ALL of us.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Is it normal to feel insanely weak? My arms are like jelly and I'm used to working out every morning. I'm not a big guy...5"11 and weigh 210lbs and work out every morning. I have absolutely NO energy and would be luck to lift 50lbs right now. Legs feel weak, body is cold and my mi d could not be more hazy. This is just nuts.
Helpful - 0
1198664 tn?1368647812
Lol your specs are exactly mine. 5'11 and WAS 210 in my first WD. Now I'm up in weight quite a bit from pill abuse.
Perfectly normal. Everything you are feeling is spot on man. I was probably even worse than you my first time through. The mental portion for me was almost unbearable I sunk into a compete depressed/anxiety state that I didn't think I would ever get out of. But just wait. That first REAL laugh and smile, the one that you haven't felt in a long time will be coming soon. When it does it will few like the first time you have ever laughed in your life!  I promise everything you are felling is normal and will stop. Weakness will last a few weeks tho. Maybe a little longer. But not as bad as now. Now you are in hell. No two ways about it.
Helpful - 0
1 Comments
I totally agree on the first time you find something really funny. It's a great feeling. Once you get out of the fog, the genuine laughs are great. Even music seems to sound better. That day is coming for you really soon Okie.
Avatar universal
I really appreciate all these responses letting me know that what I'm feeling is normal. Had I known this is what I would go through I would have never taken that first pill. This WD process is not worth the few hours of feeling good that a pill brings. Then a few hours later you have to take another and so on.

To be honest...today seems slightly easier than yesterday for some reason. I do feel like crap but maybe not as bad as yesterday. The mental aspect is going to be my biggest battle.
Helpful - 0
15290316 tn?1447023108
How's it going tonight Okie? Thinking of you!
Helpful - 0
4522800 tn?1470325834
Oh, Yes! I was just Singing and Singing out loud all the Time..lol

YOU have been turning little corners all the time here. The mental is a bit down the road, but it is not at all like the physical. It takes some time for all those Brain Chems to adjust back from the removal of these Stims. It is just getting used to living life with some pain or not wanting to get high for this or that reason. Whatever the reason here, this is what has to Change. We have to Re-learn & Learn all over again and change many, many Behaviors too.

For me it was not just the pain pills. I was used to using just for the heck of it, or at a party and everyone was doing this. Environment!!! I could always walk away and come back again, until those opiates got a Big hold on me. Methadone was my worst enemy here in the long run. SO it is just living Life and dealing with our life without using a substance to Alter our Mind or Brain Chems. This is the part that will wave in & out too. YOU will be just fine. ALWAYS...Try to keep busy and re-direct your thinking. We call it Stinken-Thinken! I just know YOU are going to come around really soon and fast here..Just hang tight and hold that Patience.
Bless
Vickie
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Holy cow what's going on with my legs. When I try to lay down and rest my legs want to take off and run a marathon and my muscles spasm. Please tell me this is a normal part of WD.
Helpful - 0
13565897 tn?1430515982
yep called RLS ( restless leg syndrome) and very hard to control the are some OTC meds from a company called Hylands check them out if it gets bad.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
restless legs...if that is what you have....thats the worst...strikes when youare trying to relax...can drive you insane....but it does pass
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Magnesium supplements did wonders for my rls. I'm sure many will agree with that too! And I would cover my legs in icy hot along with a hot heating pad. seems like a lot of work but once it all kicks in you will feel nice. at least your legs lol good luck
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
  I surprisingly have been through this more times then I could count and for me it wasn't the physical WD that got the best of me, it ***** ya but with regular meds and time I could feel it getting better, so I could see the light and knew I'd come through that.
  BUT it's the seemingly endless mental suffering that was endless, and that is where I gave in. It was all too much try and lead a normal life when everyday I felt anxious, depressed, hopeless that the damage I had done to my brain was all to much, I felt defeated like there was no way out that I didn't have a say anymore in how I was feeling. I'd try and laugh but it was never genuine, I thought I was done BC who wants to live like that !!!
  I can't stress to you enough how important it is to incorporate a therapist for the remainder of your healing. I want to be blunt BC I wish someone had told me this, You can not will not succeed without someone there to help you pick up the pieces of your soul this drug takes. Also you need to have a doc on hand hand that can prescribe anti-depressants anti anxiety ....whatever BC believe this what your going through now is the easiest part.
Helpful - 0
1198664 tn?1368647812
It's normal. Restless legs it's called.
Weird thing is I have NEVER gotten it. Probably shouldn't say that out loud because most people get it. How you doing today?
Helpful - 0
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