Aa
Aa
A
A
A
Close
Avatar universal

Hydrocodone Addiction....I think!

So...I must be an addict....I keep telling myself that I am going to stop taking the damn things and day after day I continue!  So does that make me an addict?  I have been talking Lorcet 10/650 for about 7 months....3-5 a day.  I have even posted here before!  Can I take a moment to tell you some things please...I have no one to talk to and my husband seems like it is a matter of "just dont take them".  
I am a nurse.  This time last year I worked 3 jobs and went to school fulltime...I loved myself...my kids...my life...i  was independent....pretty...confindent....and loved waking up...

NOW-I hate myself...I sleep alot...I dont work...Me marriage is failing....I seem to lack any motivation to do anything.  I do think life would be better if I was not here, but I would NEVER hurt myself!  I feel like the world is on my shoulders....I have loser, i hate myself, and many other things going through my head throughout the day.  I cry alot.  I am ill all the time..I dont wanna get out and go ANYWHERE~~  My husband said its the pills.
I dont take them for pain.  1 1/2 years ago I found out that my husband used "coke" on an occasional basis and It completely took me by surprise...I got very depressed.  U see this man was great to me.  I never thought he was a liar or decietful.  and to think that he had been lying to me killed me!!  So, I covered up my pain and hurt and thoughts by taking Lorcets.  THere is more to what he done but I am not going to type it all.  REgardless....It brought me down BIG TIME!

BACK TO THE PRESENT--I wanna stop taking this things...I want my life back...I cant go to rehab..i have 2 sons.  I wanna taper but it never seems to work!  I get more.  How do I pick myself up out of this lonely dark tunnel and get my life back?  I need my confindence back...my smile...my independence...a job....energy....my own thoughts!  maybe once i get these things back...i can leave him and be on my own...that way i dont have to listen to him ***** because i want do coke!!!   (i dont like it at all, but he does, and I refuse to do it----so he wines like a baby---husband arent suppose to get their wives to do drugs are they??????)

Please please someone, anyone talk to me!
18 Responses
Sort by: Helpful Oldest Newest
Avatar universal
msgeorgia you're story and symptms are exactly like mine, switch sex's though....i was taking about 3-5 to day for about 8 months to a year....it sucks, i know...im now on an extremely low dose of methadone becaues i cant afford to detox right now with work nad school....i wound recommend methadone, as i am going to have a long Xmas break getting off it, but its better than me paying 5 bucks a pop on the street runing legal risks...check my profile out if u want to talk about anything id be glad, as me and you have about the same tolerance/level of addiction...
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
So I ended up taking 3 today anyway.  Its better than the 4 1/2 I have been taking for a couple of days.  I actually had a great day.  Tomorrow I am going to try 1 maybe 1 1/2.  Thanks for all the support!  Goodnight
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
How long have you been taking them??  You said 2 a day right?  Congratulations on beating ur cancer.  My husbands gmother is going through it right now, so I know a little bit of how you are feeling.  Good idea to send hydro with hubby.  I hope he sticks to it.  My husband kept forgetting until I just stopped asking him.  
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I am  a brain cancer survivor. started taking hydrocodone after I stopped chemo. I took chemo for 15 months, felt like **** going through it and when i stopped I felt even worse. So I started taking 2 pills a day 10-325 hydro. I wasn't consistent with it. But have foud myself pretty consistant for a couple months now. I'll miss a day here and there but I have noticed it has become pretty routine. My plan is to stop tommorrow, seeing as how I already took them today. Sending the pills off with my hisband tommorrow. I do need to take them about 3 days a month for my cycle. Really bad since chemo. So I  am used to feeling like ****, this has been a nice break but maybe a heads up on what I should expect? And my other question is, is this a high dose I have been taking? Thanks for your help
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
So it is 4:17 here in GA.  I have taken 10 mg today.  I feel better today, only because I think I have finally made up my mind to stop taking.  I told my husband just a minute ago "I feel depressed in a way but I feel good"  He looked at me kinda funny...  I said "that didnt sound right did it" "but Hey that is how I feel"  LOL.....
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Yes I can get some.  My husbands mother actually takes them at night.  I think I may have about 5 here in my home.  I know how to start recovery and I know it is the best thing, but how do I continue and stick with it?  Starting and saying I am going to quit is the easiest part to me.....Especially tonight when we have supper, that used to be the best time for me.  Made food taste AWESOME  LOL....But not anymore, they barely affect me....make me feel like **** mostly!  I know I am rambling....thanks  
Helpful - 0
222369 tn?1274474635
Your words are a lot like many on here. We are addicts, and you must first and foremost release the guilt you have been harboring and turn it into positive energy for recovery. There's some information on my profile that may be helpful..just click the blue Ga Guy link to the left of this post. Clonidine will be very very helpful when you begin to go into withdrawals. Is there any way you can get some?
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
How long have you been taking the Vics?  The Lorcets done the same to me.  At first I liked it, but then they started not working.  So I would take me and eventually get sick.  My skin felt bad, kinda wet and cakelike.  Then I would get the feeling for like 20 minutes and get sleepy.  God I hate them so bad!  Congratulations on your recovery from alcohol.  If you beat that God knows you can beat this.  Look at me.  I am giving advice when just 2 hours ago, I was the one needing it.  WOW!  My friend came over trying to get me to go shopping, but I just dont feel up to it yet.  

EVERYONE ELSE---How long after the taper does the withdrawals start??  Will I hallucinate or anything?  
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I have started getting a nasty headache the last couple of days and I'm wondering if anyone thinks this a direct or rebound? effect from taking about 3 10/325 vics a day?  I am extremely careful not to take any other products with Tylenol in them but I have taken regular aspirin and ibuprofen because the headaches hurt so much.  It seems to be centered behind the eyes and in the temples.  Dehydration?  Anyway, bottom line is I was in extreme good health until a few months ago when I started up with these pills and now I am all screwed up.  It is absolutely amazing how easy they are to obtain. Of course that doesn't mean anything.  All drugs can be obtained if you want them bad enough.  The will to be sober has to be from inside and not from any outside control.  I am not quite ready to let go of the drugs yet but it's gettting closer and I'll tell ya I ain't lookin forward to the withdrawl.  I hope the detox drugs work!!!! PS - has anyone heard of Tramadol for detox purposes?
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I am a professional who was managed to become hooked on vicodin.  Right now I am taking about 3 10mg a day but they are not working like they used to.  Now i need more to get that dreamy feeling and they are starting to make me sick.  I have gone through withdrawl from the Vic and it is hell; sweating, chills, headaches, extreme depression, soreness in the limbs.  These are all normal withdrawl symptoms and one of the reasons I started taking the Vic again - withdrawl is painful and depressing!!  Please note also that I am a recovering alcoholic who has not had a drink in almost 10 years and i still managed to get myself into this mess.  I read of  a doctor this morning who helps addicts detox with buepernorphine (sp?) and he is less than an hour away from me.  Thank God for this doctor.  I am planning on going to see him so i can detox.  Funny thing - I thought I was smart enough to handle Vicodin.  What a joke!!! No one is smarter than the drug.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
thanks for yours and ALL the posts from everyone!!!  I have taken 1/2 today.  God I hope I dont take anymore....I dont even want them!!!!  I do believe it has brought on depression.  I have never felt this way!  EVER!  I didnt mean to come off as saying that he is NOT supportive, just not as supportive as I would like.  I want him to take them with him to work, but he forgets.  I want him to ask me about it.. but he dont.  I want him to seem concerned, but he dont.  He just says "i am going to flush them"  "just dont take em"....Its hard though....I am scared of the withdrawals...When I dont take them all the lies and deception from him way heavy on my mind!  Why am I so sensitive to it?  It wasnt THAT bad...Not as though he cheated or anything!  Oh well...I am trying...God how i am trying!  Its like I am so lonely or something!  I hate this!!!!
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
georgea,

if you dont quit, things will probably get worse.

for everyone involved.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I hear you,

I believe it is the drug!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I was happy, energetic all the above
than the pills just turn on you
boom out of the blue, I could not stant the mornings
I had to take a pill just to function, it has brought on immense depression!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I am a retired nurse.  IT IS THE DRUG please reak the posts if you can not taper look into suboxone or c/t when your sons are on maybe fall break?
use the cover story for them that you have the flu and set up play dates for them, babbysitters or relatives?
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Welcome MsGeorgia and thanks for sharing your story. Look at you life before the drugs, where you seem to have endless energy to carry 3 jobs and school, and now your down for the count and you have major problems with your health and family. You are going to have to wait to deal with those things until you get back on your feet. You said you used because of your husband to numb the pain but it numbs all your senses too. Deal with your husband later, but get well first and your not to far into your addiction that you cant come out better than before you used. If you are going to come off the pills and detox at home, you are going to need a few things that are listed in this site to to help with withdrawal's which are like a cold or flu and that is what you tell everyone so you can get some time off from work if you need it and within a weeks time you will feel better physically. Than you must deal with your emotionals that got you here in the first place, and you may need some help with that. Only when you are strong enough, deal with your husband and the issues. There are plenty of people here who want to help.  
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
good morning mrs. georgia,

well i am the wife of an addict, i dont do drugs but my hubby is on day 6 of cold turkey from lortabs. He was taking 15 a day for a year. I suspected sometimes but when i confronted him he said he wasnt so i believed him.

I wont pretend to know what your going through only can tell you what my hubby is going through. Keep in mind he's cold turkey ok. And ignore my bad spelling please.

Shakes, severe leg cramps, nervousness, fever, vomating, diehere, sweats, can not sleep, flu like symptons.

1st 3 days were really bad not going to lie, leg cramps seem to be the worst, after day 2 i went and bought him a sleep aid with non pain med, and that helped alot. He was able to rest at night. Kinda have to push yourself to get up in the morning, i know it's hard with no support at home, my hubby told me yesterday i dont think i would have made it without you. So maybe we can be your support. When you first get up maybe you could log in and talk with us. My hubby only wanted to do cold turkey, he said he would not come off one thing and on to another so it was hard. But if you will just repeat to yourself

god doesnt give us nothing we cant handle, every min u can.

I'm not an active member in church and im not about to preach to no one, but i promised god if he could just get my hubby through this i would make my life right and i intend on keeping that promise.

Like others have said you can not worry about your hubby right now only yourself, you have 2 children to take care of and they are your first priority right now. Im sorry your hubby can not support you but i will i promise.
Helpful - 0
199177 tn?1490498534
well give it time more people will respond. Yes sweating is very normal,as is sleeplessness.
Avis
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I was hoping to get more people to talk to...lol...I wanted to say that yesterday I kinda tapered a bit....is sweating a withdrawal...I also had terrible (i do mean terrible) dreams last night of my husband cheating.  I also heard plastic bags being messed with, kids in the background, loud noises in my ear and some other weird sounds....am i hallucinating (audily)?????Weird!
Helpful - 0
199177 tn?1490498534
Welcome!!!!!!
Well first and formost , This is your life and the great thing about that it you can choose to change it for the better. If you want more out of life then you are getting right now then you CAN get more. It however is going to take work . Right now you need to just work on you dont worry about hubby right now. The first thing you are going to have to desided is do you want to try another taper or just CT it.
We are here to support and help.
Avis
Helpful - 0
Have an Answer?

You are reading content posted in the Addiction: Substance Abuse Community

Top Addiction Answerers
495284 tn?1333894042
City of Dominatrix, MN
Avatar universal
phoenix, AZ
Learn About Top Answerers
Didn't find the answer you were looking for?
Ask a question
Popular Resources
Is treating glaucoma with marijuana all hype, or can hemp actually help?
If you think marijuana has no ill effects on your health, this article from Missouri Medicine may make you think again.
Julia Aharonov, DO, reveals the quickest way to beat drug withdrawal.
Tricks to help you quit for good.
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
Herpes spreads by oral, vaginal and anal sex.