I freaked out

[Vecci4u]

So for the last 2 days I have taken a 1 norco... Today I ran out.... My body was screaming for it.... I called my pharmacy... Nope sorry you got 5 more days!!!!  They always fill a couple days early not this time.... My mind starts running ok transfer to a mom and pop place , and I did!!!! I met the pharmacist a couple weeks ago nice guy , don't know what will happen...

I had tapered from 12 to 7 for the week prior I am a mess, cant concentrate at work... Took off Monday, today told boss would be in and out today and tomorrow(made up a excuse) god I feel like crap... And I know the worst is to come ;(

[Bkitty]

When I went to tell my husband that I was an addict his response was " Oh I knew that". Its funny how we think we are hiding this secret but yet again its so obvious. I understand the trust issue. I dont know if you are open to this but husband and I saw a therapist together and it literally changed our lives and saved this marriage. I had to prove to him that I can be trusted. I had to show him I had to be held accountable for my acions. Secrets keep us sick. You dont have to run anymore. Hang in there. I promise it will all be OK.Its not easy. But its also not as bad as you think it is either. Forgive yourself. You are human and you have a disease. This is reality. You have to accept that. Did you cancel your script??? The one that you are supposed to pick up in a few days?? Its time sweetie, Its time to be done with this. You know what I mean? (((hugs)))~Bkitty

[Vecci4u]

No need I just got red flagged by my wife. Just posted, the secret came out... She found out, game over....

I guess divine intervention made sure I ran into every roadblock this time....

This is going to take significant time to repair with my wife, as trust is lost.... And has been for some time... ThIs comming off chatting with a coworker she found out about a half a year ago...

I feel like such scum

[Fireby29]

Vecci, the first step to being free from this, and it might be the hardest thing you ever do, is to call your doctor and both pharmacies and tell them to red flag you as a abuser/addict.  No narcs.

You will feel liberated at the same time, and be scoring the first victory for yourself.  If you keep the option to refill open, this will never end.  I went through the same thing, and I did not get on a proper recovery path until I cut off ALL supply.  You can do it, make the calls.

Bryan

[selfinduced]

It is what it is, just go with it and do whatever you can to bring comfort. This may be the motivation ya needed (sorry). Hunker down , remember attitude is EVERYTHING. Rememeber all the times you detoxed and didn't even know it. Tell yourself you have the flu and treat the symptoms as they present. Once you get thru this, you won't want those nasty pills. Hang in...

[Vecci4u]

Thanks self,

I have no option right now.... It's just me and my mind and my body pleading for a pill.... Just one...... Just one.... That's all it wants.,,.

I cannot live like this, this is pure hell. I saw a post one time on here, it must of been removed to just suck this up and we should all stop whining... I have been through a lot..... Years of using opiates and comming off is hell... Sorry all reading that are thinking about it.... But you have to know this truth of our consequences.... Pure hell

[selfinduced]

Oh Man, I feel for you, I truly do. PLEASE, get the thomas recipe, take some hot, hot baths, make some sleepy time tea and give yourself time to get past these acute w/d's. Don't go get the script. It's pay now or pay later. No way around it. To get over ya gotta get through. We are here to lean on. Your kid does need you. Stop this madness. I am not judging, just see myself in you and being pill free is ...well, no words to describe it. Stay storng mentally and just surrender to the physical crap....it will pass soon.

[Vecci4u]

That's cvs sorry auto correct,.... The doc nurse never called. Either because I left message I wanted to talk about my dose and they don't want to deal with it, or they are not in,....

Who knows I won't answer even if they do, I can't even muster up enough to bs with them right now

[Vecci4u]

Hi guys complete hell...... It's day 2, I have all the classic symptoms... I have no energy, all flu symptoms... Staying hydrated and immodium... My mind is not in the right place right now...

If a pill was in front of me I would take it , no questions asked.... I gotta hope by Tuesday the symptoms subside and I can function..... I can't keep running out of work like this... I have people groups to depend ona child who wants her daddy and a wife who is worried why I am so sick... If only everyone knew.... I know the pills put me here , but I am in the throws of wd right now

I called my dr office this morning to have someone call me... I was gonna make up excuse I want a diff med, doubt they would of done it anyway, as CBS called them one time to say I was overusing. I am surprised more haven't, or that my doctor for years has believed my bs

Thanks guys so good to get some of that out with no one to talk to

[gratefulogan]

I myself have never actually gotten drugs from a dr. but I do think they give these things out far too liberally. at the very least they should come with a HUGE warning label.

i think some people would rather deal with a little pain right now compared to having these pills completely wreck their lives.

[selfinduced]

What a brilliant idea!!!! I don't think unless you have gone through w/d, you can appreciate the soul and physical wrecking experience it brings.....

[gratefulogan]

sort of off topic.. but i think they should make dr's go through wd one time before they can write narcotic opioid scripts. sort of like how a cop has to be tased before they can tase anyone else..

all that aside, why not just stop now while your ahead? hell if you have to wait 5 days anyway you will be through the worst of it already! if you get another script you will just end up doing it again, and again..

so just buckle up and try to ride it out. at the end you will find it much more rewarding being sober. imagine being able to LIVE LIFE without having to run into little 5 day bouts with this crap every month..

[selfinduced]

How ya making out?

[Vecci4u]

God bless you Mary

[mary577]

I hope before the five days are up, you are around the bend, and can see things more clearly and will want to stay off of them.   Got my fingers crossed for you.

[Vecci4u]

I think your right... Soul searching is going to happen a lot these next 5 days

[Bkitty]

I have to say, by keeping that script you will only be setting yourself up to keep riding on this merry go round. Id hate to see that happen after you go thru 5 days and this stuff will be out of your system by then. You need to do some really deep soul searching and try and figure out what it is you want. Im having to do that now,, after being 253days clean,,I find myself back at the beginning trying to figure that out. As addicts, we know what we need to do. We have to stop running at some point right?((hugs))~Bkitty

[Vecci4u]

Bkitty I know your right.... I guess I am just so scared and it's a crutch I know something is waiting and is what I'm holding onto....

I don't even know if that makes any sense... It's just all I can keep as hope... As sad as that is

[Bkitty]

In 5 days from now you will be thru the worst of all this! Id cancel the script. It will be hard to start tapering when you have not had anything for 5 days,, whats the point? If you want to quit, now is the oppurtunity to do so once and for all. Do you see what I mean?~Bkitty

[Vecci4u]

So made it through day 1... I feel like crap.... I spent hours away from the office, made up excuses.... Not that that's new when wd it's a given. So I changed my script from Walgreens to a local mom and pop

The guy is super nice he knows me by name, and called me to tell me the same thing Walgreens said you got 5 days more... Maybe this transfer when I panicked was a blessing in disguise ... Walgreens could give 2 craps about you.... This guy will know my name know my face ... I won't be able to bs my way through different Walgreens.... O I hope tomorrow feels better

[Vecci4u]

Thanks guys, I planned on keep tapering... I know the mom and pop place will see early refill to, my hope was the bs we do in the thick of things to let me slide on cash.... Yuck

I so want to quit.... I guess just so scared... Just a awful feeling and point to be at day 1

[On2better]

Plan on being sick with the flu for the next 4 days and make the jump for good! I'm on day 9 and feeling like myself again. It really doesn't take long. Just let it run it's course like you would with the flu.  Good luck, keep posting! You have a lot of support here.

[waterLilly7]

my suggestion is to jump off now. Keep reaing the forum posts and you will see it only gegts worse from here. Do you want to quit now before everything falls apart?

Please, read the forum well. If I would have read the forum in the very beginning I would have stopped. I am now at day 28 and feeling good.

hugs,
Lily

[mary577]

Hang in there...you can do this.   I think the idea of withdrawal is about 20 times worse than the reality.   The fear of withdrawal is what kept me taking these pills longer....much longer.    The idea of running out caused severe anxiety.    When someone stole my pills a couple of times, I panicked....afraid of going through withdrawal.    When I finally decided no more....that was the first step.   You have to make up your mind...no more.

I'm an old gray haired lady....and withdrawal didn't kill me, so I know you can do it.   I knew I'd feel bad...okay....really bad for a few days.   What is a few days out of the rest of your life, in order to get healthy again?   And that is what we need to focus on.....the pills are ruining our health.   There is nothing good that can come from them when they are taken long term like many of us took them.  

If you can get through today....and tomorrow, you have the weekend to get
through the worst.    You may not feel like a million bucks, but you will start to feel better every day.

Come on....hang in there!

[IBKleen]

If you are using insurance to pay for the meds you will get caught refilling early at another pharmacy. Do you have intensions of stopping after this refill?