Im just lost and depressed

[takingback]

After a major surgery on my shoulder, I was prescribed percocets, soma, and tramadol.  I have been taking for 3yrs now.  Im so tired of it.  I notice that it has my mind into mush.  This is my 3rd time trying to quit in the last 2-3 months.  I have always done c/t.  This time I have gotten myself done to some days only 3 percs, and 1-2 soma, and some days 5 percs, and 1-2 soma.  I have most of the things from the thomas recipe, and I also take those things as well.  Is that harmful while still taking the percs?  Or will this help at all once I decide to just stop taking the narcotics?  I hope that it will be helpful.  I am also wondering if the fact that I am now on Vytorin for my high cholesterol, and possibly in perimenopause, is that why I find myself so depressed?  I do not work, so just idle time on my hands, and I have soooo many other life problems right now that it only adds to the depression, and makes me want to use more.  How do I get out of this horrible agony.

I want me back, I want my mind back.  It just feels like I will never be able to get thru this.  With the issue of the percs, it is 90 percent mentatl for me at this point, mentally I take them to try to escape the depression, and not feel.  I have some anxiety everytime I think about my problems, and I just want it to go away, so I use.  This is so hard. I need help.

[10356]

Hi takingback. I'm glad you found us :) the cycle we get into with the drugs furthers our depression and anxiety. they had you on a combo that would lead to all you describe.. You are down to a reasonable amount to jump.. all the preparation will pay off the only thing you need now is confidence that you can beat this addiction and a positive outlook.. taking your life back is a very powerful feeling.. the difference once past the wd is like night and day. at least for myself. I also worked on my past so I was able to move forward. The problems I had while using were so magnified as active addiction forces us to keep looking within, once clean it frees us to see outside ourself's. the clarity it brings is amazing and it lends to working out what has us down.. You can do this You can take your life back ya just got to get the Courage up the Confidence that you can do it. I wish you the very best. lesa

[Iwantanewlifenow]

I suffer from depression and severe anxiety, too...So I do know how you feel.Plus my life situation is not very good at the moment..Though I took the pills as prescribed..I'd be lying if I didn't say I enjoyed the sense of relief and not caring they gave me. I'm not even sure how much they are really helping with the physical pain. I have to deal with my home situation..but I want to do it when I'm of a clear mind.