Aa
Aa
A
A
A
Close
280102 tn?1208877222

Just for today..

I'm feeling really manic today.  A couple little things went wrong already, and it looks like I've let them ruin my morning so far.  I know I have a choice tho, I know it's up to me whether or not I choose to allow God to work in my life today.  I know that only I can change my attitude.  It's just that sometimes it's like I'm constantly arguing with myself.  Thought race through my head like a fkn train, it's really exhausting and I'm pretty sure it's a big reason I used and kept using.  I made a decision to turn my will and my life over to God, and I need to put it in practice.  I need to get out of myself, and into my higher power, because I know He will do great things for me.  I've heard this so many times before, Believe and ye shall Receive, I guess I never really belived before unless I was in some kind trouble.  I never let God into my conscience mind.  I've decided to change that, not only to get clean, but because I want to be happy without drugs.  I want peace, serenity, I want to actually enjoy being Jennifer. I want to be able to be nice to myself, and to be at peace with my past.  I've seen people in this program that have what I want.  These people seem ok, and I want to be ok too.  Thanks for listening :)
6 Responses
Sort by: Helpful Oldest Newest
Avatar universal
one thing that is hard is patience they say "good things come to those who wait" and i know as an addict patience is not big.......you want it and you want it now.......
It will come remember this "the really good things in life are worth waiting for"..........
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I had horrible day myself yesterday.  Sooo many things went wrong.  I let it ruin my whole day and was crabby with those around me.  It stinks.  I have so many positive things from sub and it's normal to have setbacks I know.  But now that I'm of these pills I see soem negative parts of me back.  (the way I obsess about things - upset over little things etc).  I too need to just calmdown and let God help and change my outlook.
ANOTHER Jennifer too :)
Helpful - 0
338536 tn?1197554232
Today is your day to overcome, to stand up, to FIGHT.  It's all within you.  God put it there when you were but a twinkle in your parents' eyes.  It's time you found IT.  God may help, but He also wants to see how much you will help yourself.  So find your FIGHTING side within you and use it to beat the Hell out of the addictive side.  So bad the it'll think twice about coming back to visit.  I'm battling everyday, but I think I was born to fight.  I'm here with you and we'll beat this together.  I too live in H Town, Pill Mecca of the US.  I'm not far away and am directing prayers your way.  Love and Strength!
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I agree,,,very good post..
thanks
r2r
Helpful - 0
271792 tn?1334979657
You find find it. You have it within yourself.

Not every day is going to be a good day. That is just life. It is how we handle it that makes the difference.

Keep doing what you are doing.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Great post.... and I can relate to it word for word.  You have me thinking about some things I have pushed aside.  Thank you.

From another Jennifer...
Helpful - 0
Have an Answer?

You are reading content posted in the Addiction: Substance Abuse Community

Top Addiction Answerers
495284 tn?1333894042
City of Dominatrix, MN
Avatar universal
phoenix, AZ
Learn About Top Answerers
Didn't find the answer you were looking for?
Ask a question
Popular Resources
Is treating glaucoma with marijuana all hype, or can hemp actually help?
If you think marijuana has no ill effects on your health, this article from Missouri Medicine may make you think again.
Julia Aharonov, DO, reveals the quickest way to beat drug withdrawal.
Tricks to help you quit for good.
A list of national and international resources and hotlines to help connect you to needed health and medical services.
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.