Last 10/325 mg 2 hours ago

[oxypain101]

Hi,

I just took my last pill this morning at 8:30am.  My horror story started 16 months ago when i blew out my back.  I was prescribed hydro 10/325 every 6 hours as needed for back and leg pain.  6 months later the hydro stopped working and i was prescribed oxy 10/325 every six hours.  To make a long story short i reached 10-12 pills a day for the past 12 months.  I know I have a problem and a few months ago i tried to stop but i could not make it past day 2.  I am scared and feel lonely even though i am part of a family of 5.  I dont know what to do for I have run out of pills and feel like i will never make it thru the withdrawal process.  Can somebody please help me and give me an idea of what i can expect the next 5 days???  just a small timeline of when things will get better will help.  Does the Thomas recipe work??  please any help will be appreciated.  I have a family and I am scared to death.  PLEASE

[oxypain101]

Smalltownmom,  I just read your entire blog.  WOW you really had it bad.  How are you feeling now at 34 days?  Is your energy back full force.  That the major problem i am dealing with at day 7.  i finally fell asleep last night at 12 and woke up at 5, so i was happy with 5 hours.  my mood is upbeat and i am starting to relax more at work.  i think the hot baths and work helped me get thru this week.  I really hope everybody sticks to the plan.  I am so ashamed of myself for all that has happened.  At what day did you notice your energy come back.  I know its a crazy question and everyone is different.  Any input would be appreciated.

Thanks,
SZ

[oxypain101]

Smalltownmom,  I just read your entire blog.  WOW you really had it bad.  How are you feeling now at 34 days?  Is your energy back full force.  That the major problem i am dealing with at day 7.  i finally fell asleep last night at 12 and woke up at 5, so i was happy with 5 hours.  my mood is upbeat and i am starting to relax more at work.  i think the hot baths and work helped me get thru this week.  I really hope everybody sticks to the plan.  I am so ashamed of myself for all that has happened.  At what day did you notice your energy come back.  I know its a crazy question and everyone is different.  Any input would be appreciated.

Thanks,
SZ

[Smalltownmom]

Yay for one week! Time goes by slow but it goes by! Good luck at your meeting tonight. It helps a lot of people. Don't be afraid. Everyone there has been where you are. :)

[oxypain101]

Here we go day 7!  Made it 1 week :)

[oxypain101]

Hey dude,

Just laying on my couch.  Feeling good and low anxiety, but havine a hard tI me falling asleep.  Going to my first meeting tomm.  I am very nervous and feel I might back out of it.  I wonder if my determination will get me thru this addiction without meetings?  I don't know dude.  Watching Pearl Harbor.  

[gnarly_1]

Hey dude  just stopping by to see how your doing...I hope your at a meeting this is the next critical step in recovery.... if you have questions about them please ask   we have a lot of members here who belong to both N/A as well as A/A .....I promise you you will be glad you went please dont  skip this....with a progam of recovery this could be your last detox...those that go to meeting tend to stay clean
..............................................Gnarly........................................

[gnarly_1]

Hey Dude congrats on day 6 the phyical withdrawals  should start to get a lot better  your doing great ....as I have said b/4 this is 1/3 phyical and 2/3rds mental...I am not trying to down play how hard the phyical part is but rather prepare you for the mental mindscrew .....the mindscrew is what drives you to use again....aftercare is a critical part of recovery...the statistics show that less then 10% will make it without aftercare time to start hitting the meetings....I know it is out of most peoples comfort zone and  most are scard to go to there first meeting  you dont need to speak  just go and lissen...with time you will start to realize the similarity in all addicts and that your not alone...it will also give you some place to share where the people will understand  get to a meeting and please post to break the fear for others that are still on the fence about going
...........................................Gnarly............................................

[oxypain101]

Bella,

I almost can't believe I made it this far.  Seems like a million miles away.  Even my wife says I look diff and my eyes are bright white.  Energy is low, but I keep as busy as I can even if I'm tired.  Really happy with day 6 :)  tomorrow will be a week :)  10 days my next goal.  Take care and thanks

[BellaJake]

First....Way to go!!!!!! DAY 6!!!! It was when I saw those improvements that I knew I was on my way. And meetings sound like the perfect next step if you are thinking about pills. Just remind yourself....those thoughts will pass but remind yourself what you don't want to go back to!  You are kicking butt!

[oxypain101]

Day 6!  Slept from 9pm-2am and 3 am til 6am :) feel myself getting better.  Talk it over with my family and today I will look for a local N/A metting.  I don't want this feeling of accomplishment to fade.  I do think of the pills and that's scary.  

[oxypain101]

i have a question.  is it possible i damaged my liver the past 16 months taking oxycodone?  now i am starting to worry about that after reading some threads?  Or, would that take years of use?

[Frogger76]

Keep on trucking my friend, your doing awesome!!!

[oxypain101]

thanks Frogger

[gnarly_1]

Hey Dude.....congrats on day 5......the energy crash is different for everybody alot has to do with your age  the 20 somethings bounce back in 2 weeks  the 30s a few more  anything over 40 it can be a wile  you will feel a lot better in 30 days  you didnt become a addict over night and like wise recovery takes time  as for the meetings  I have been clean years and still hit 3 to 4 a weeks  there is no cure for addiction  it is a disease and like any disease you need to treat it  the meetings are only a hour long and will give you some place safe to share where the people will understand  with time and working the steps you will loose the desire to use...rry to step out of your comfortzone and get to a meeting it will be worth your time
........................................Gnarly..........................

[oxypain101]

Btw I can't believe I made it to Monday morning.  This is an amazing accomplishment :)  hope time really starts to move and I make it to 10 days safe and healthy.  Thank all

[oxypain101]

Yes the physical part is almost completely gone.  Just have no energy.  When will my energy come back?  I am so scared to go to N/A meeting, but I know I have too.  How long will it have to go to meetings?  

[gnarly_1]

Hey Dude  your should be turning the corner any time now....the phyical will be behind you but the ''mental mindscrew'' starts to be a ishue....time to google a N/A meeting near you keep posting for support
..........................................Gnarly.................................................

[Smalltownmom]

It's all down hill from here man! You're totally kicking this craps butt. So happy for you!

[oxypain101]

Day 5 :)

Actually slept 6 total hours last night.  Broken but I will take it.

[Smalltownmom]

You can't beat Brady and Gronk. Dream team! I just hope they don't lose tonight. The backlash will be nasty. Pats don't care though. Move to the next. I felt the same way about my kids. I don't remember some things and I beat myself up over it but guess what. You have the rest of your life to do the right thing. Be the best Dad ever. I've done more things with my kids the past two weeks Ive done in years. We were dancing like nut cases yesterday. Kids loved it! Keep it up. They will all be happier!

[oxypain101]

I also like the patriots.  Hard not too.  Yes sport have really helped me the pass 4 days.  I plan on winning this fight.  Kids woke up this morning as they were playing I looked at them and realized what a disservice I been doing to them.  That's sad when you realize you been a fake *SS father for the past 16 months.  That hurts the most.  Oh I will be watch cubs game and patriots/Colts game tonight.  Have Brady and gronk on my fantasy team :)

[Smalltownmom]

Oxy you are right on track! Our minds are our worst enemy in this process. Don't let it get the best of you! Do something to get your mind off it. Watch a movie, read on here. That's what I did. Nat geo, history and discovery channels have been my best friends. I love that stuff. But definitely do something to keep your mind busy. You like sports I see so watch the sports channel. Awesome football game on tonight! Pats vs Colts. I'm a Pats fan (don't hate lol) I'm a New Englander and Love it! How did the soccer game go yesterday?

[oxypain101]

Here we go day 4.  Only slept 4 hour last night.  Woke up at 2:30 and been awake ever since.  Aches and pains seem to be gone.  I will see how this day goes, but things have def peaked.  Anxiety is def high and my mind can't stop thinking.  Sure the craving for 1 pill is there, but I do a decent job of shutting it down immediately.  I just want to feel normal.  

[oxypain101]

Puppies

Thanks for the words of encouragement.  Soaked for about 2 hours and almost done watching my cubs lose tonight.  It's ok.  They lost the first game to the cardinals.  They will get them tomm.  They still have the 9th but it's 4-1.  Oh they just hit a Homer make that 4-2 :)  as I type this messages.  Feeling much better tomm day 4.  Peace to all and thank you all.  Kill the oxy killer :)

[Trixie_007]

I just wanted to say that you are a true warrior! To take on CT withdrawals and work no less is awesome. You are super strong for doing it! I went off 180mg a day of Oxy cold turkey in August and called in sick for four days. I can just tell by reading your posts that your are going to kick this crap and make it your b*tch in the end. Lol. I'm thinking you've already passed the peak of the physical part. I think another hot bath will help with the shakes. Put on some music while you're in the tub and have a good soak in there until the ball game starts. During the bad spells of WD's, I always liked to listen to my Playlist that reminded me of the good times I had before Oxycontin entered my life. It always motivated me to get back to those good old days and push through.

So tonight, I suggest tub/good tunes and then baseball.