Lord Jesus, is this real.

[hiding288]

I apologize, I feel myself caving.  I dont know if I can keep this fight up.  Im so tired.  Im tired of having to keep rubbing down, ace bandages on my legg, taking all these different capsules, and pills round the clock, drinking ensure, baths, then hot showers, praying (which I cant help), drinking this, taking that, exercising, Im tired, and sore, achy, to even keep this **** up!  Im sick of it!!!! I have just about had it.  Cant take it.  Im not stateing this for anyone to try and chestise me, or not even for pity, I just need to share how Im feeling.  Its okay, if you dont say anything, because the truth is......whatever I say, or you say, it is not going to change the way Im feeling, or take away the pains, or depression.  Nothing seems to help completely anyhow.  The way this feels, the neverending days, the countless thoughts, how in the **** can you see later being better?  I dont see it.  So Im starting to feel like, maybe Im taking myself through this whole agonizing torture just to end up back where I was.  Im sorry, Im just absolutely outdone with this ****.  I cant believe this ****.  If you arent crazy, you *** sure will be soon, having to deal with this ****.  Im bout ready to just die already!!!

[patricia08061986]

One of the best things I did was making an account on here everyone's word are truly makin
Me hold on and do thing and also makes me know I'm not alone

Love Patricia
From nh

[overopiates]

U r on the worst day.please dont give up.I would say I couldnt taper but if u can thats an option from the begining but u r getting through the worst of it and at this point it may be a litttle redundant to go back to pills.mid way through the 4th day I noticed a big difference and it eased up from there.YOU WILL FEEL BETTER I PROMISE.

[vicki595]

Yes, you need to ask your doctor about cold turkey being safe in pregnancy. We never advocate it on this forum due to the danger. Be safe,and good luck!

[butterfly99]

Dont give up i was taking 20 to thirty of hydrocodone a day and withdrweled only three days and felt beeter then ever. I did rlapse cause i let my mind take over. I think that is sometimes what we fight the most. The thought not the aches and pain. I was on that for 21/2 years. now im pregnant and tapered finalley to three and hoping cold turkeying will be safe enough since im doing it for two people now...........Dont give up keep control And keep praying he will be the only to give us strength. Dont give in. Keep kicking those thoughts out.

[phillip28]

I will be honest with you...I am only on day 3 and feel like death would be better BUT I am not living foe just me...I have 2 daughters and a wife that I don't want to have them bury a junkie and to me that's what I was/am....I don't know how far you have come but don't QUIT....man I am in misery and I have not gone 72 hours to give up...I am sure u haven't either

[Bkitty]

You know,, I too reached this point in my withdrawal. Exactly where you are. When this happened to me,,I literally threw my hands in the air and yelled "OK God! I get it!! I cant take it anymore! I surrender to you and this addiction!! Please please comfort me. I need you so bad!! Ineed to feel your love and comfort" I layed there on the floor balling my eyes out and then after about 5minutes,,,a calming peace washed over me. Maybe you could try something like that since you are praying all the time? Just a silly thought. That was probably the lowest point Ive ever been. It was at that time that I started climbing out of the hole. Right when I was at my darkest most intimate moment with myself, God and this addiction,,,somehow a glimmer of light shined. I pray that you will see that glimmer soon. (((hugs)))~Bkitty

[Sonrissa]

I'm just saying take a few deep breaths or a walk and seriously think this through! The last thing you want to do is make decision and then come here tomorrow devastated! You will be supported no matter what you do! Just don't make a rash or emotional decision! Let's talk about it! The things you are feeling now will pass, and may pass very soon! Try to be calm! We are here for support!

[vicki595]

There IS a way to taper properly even if you personally don't know what it is.
It's never fair to make blanket statements. This is about choices and options. It's pretty obvious that CT is bringing her to her knees...so maybe an option is in order. An option that could work...

[waterLilly7]

there is no way to "taper properly" to avoid symptoms. I tapered for two miserable months. It prolongs the agony. If you must do it to save your job, then yes, but if you can go CT, that is the way. Once you are on day 5 with no pills it is the same as if you tapered for months.

hang in there friend, it gets better. I know you feel now like it won't ever end, but it surely will, and please don't aplologize for praying to God, most people here do, and God helped pull me through it, and you too. Keep prayng, please.

Don't give up now, you are almost over the hump. Come out in the light with me please, stay the course,

hugs,
Lily

[vicki595]

I know what you mean and sometimes I just wonder about the wisdom of going cold turkey vs tapering. This is one of the reasons why; it brings us to the edge just when we need the most strength.

Then, feeling this way, we sometimes resort to taking pills just for a little relief from the madness and THEN beat the crap out of ourselves because we "failed"...

BS

You know what I would do?  I'd go back to a dose to get myself comfortable and then taper off properly. It helps if there's someone to help you stay on track and I promise you, you will not feel like this if you taper.

All the best and I'm sorry you're so miserable, believe me.

[Fireby29]

Sorry it's going so rough for ya.  I won't fill you with stuff you do not wanna hear.  Just don't give up.  

Bryan

[Sonrissa]

Ok, so what will happen if you start taking pills again! You will feel comfortable for a little while, and then what? Do you go on taking pills forever? What brought you to quit in the first place? You will have to start all over again! You come so far and I would hate to see you have to start this again! But, I do understand!

Take some really deep breaths!! Maybe go for a little walk and think hard about what a relapse would mean! Again, examine why you sought to quit in the first place!! Take care! We are here to listen to you!!