Aa
Lortab/Soma
Hello everyone... I used to be a member here a very long time ago and found myself in a relapse for a very long time now.. on off on off.. you know how it goes, same old story pretty much.. I am in day #3 now after taking some pills over the weekend and am heading to work in just a few hours... I will have to take this totally minute by minute I know but I need some encouragement at this point.. I know the people I used to talk to here a long time ago were very encouraging to me and I trust that they will be again even though I screwed up and relapsed. I am trying to get off this merry go round like so many others and it helps to talk to people who truly understand. Just a quick background. Started taking Lortab about 4 1/2 years ago here and there when I was told they would help to ease stress. After on again off again my use got up to about 8-9 per day until soma was added. The latest use over the last couple of years has been about 4-6 Lortab per day 10/500 and soma... until they ran out then I would do without til I could get more.. it seems so insane to read this and I wonder ove and over how I ever got here... but looking back isn't gonna change anything and I am going to have to start moving forward.
Well, I made it through work, grocery store and now home relaxing. Hoping to get a decent nights sleep. Thanks again for the support today.
Check in when you get a chance. I made it through work on day 4 with the help of wonderful people here who didn't even know me. I was so touched that total strangers would reach out to me. I am off work right now on extended leave so I post here as often as I can, hoping that I can help.
Stay positive and focused. You can do it!
Hugs,
Minn
Stay positive and focused. You can do it!
Hugs,
Minn
Wish me luck.. I am headed to work.. just gonna take this night one minute at a time if necessary but I don't have a choice ... probably best that I don't have a choice.. this way I am forced to get out of the house and do something physical... I will check back in later tonight when I get home... thanks again to everyone...
Ok.. so you both totally know where I am coming from then.. I too had my kids naturally and never even thought of taking anything stronger than like tylenol or advil for any pain.. but then there was a MAJOR family crisis right before my 33rd birthday that about broke me emotionally... when that first pill was offered as a stress reliever I should have known better with all the genetic predispositions in my dad's family history.. but alas, I caved and that's when this horibble journey began... I look back now at two very difficult pregnancies and two induced labors that were very painful and think to myself.. if I could get through that how in the world could I cave over something that now looking back seemed so ridiculous... and I know from working in the mental health profession for so many years that the brain is a funny thing.. people handle all sorts of life changes in different ways.. I used to be the person that would hit my knees Bible in hand when these things would happen and that was my support.. that is where I think alot of my shame lies is that I have depended on a substance now where I used to depend on God ... and for that I am truly ashamed because I know the power He has is much greater than a pill could ever be... I just have to get back to that mentality again where my dependance lies where it ought to be and not where it has been for the last 4+ years... thank you all for your kind words... the support from others really does help ALOT...
Yes I know the drill all too well unfortunately... and I know it takes a period of time... so I know all the steps to take to do this again... and yes I have tried anti depressants before.. never seemed to help much.. I just stick to my vitamin regimen and some aminos for energy... I have found that taking st. john's wart seems to help with my anxiety and depression somewhat so if I take that on a regular basis that seems to help as much or more than the anti depressants I have tried.. I used to work in the mental health profession so believe me I know all the steps and what to do it's just getting over the hump to do them ya know? I'll get there.. but like everyone else it just takes time... thanks again for your comments.. they are much appreciated...
I understand. I was probably addicted to food and doomed from the outset! :)
I figured you you had heard it before..figured would not hurt to post it again. I am almost 90 days clean this time and about 8 weeks the time before. I am determined this is my last rodeo for the pills. Working on the ciggies now! I think that will be even harder. Addiction is in my family (alcohol). I never had that problem..hated it and most drugs. I tried my share in college and walked away like it never happened. But these opiates...man they grab hold and stick like superglue. At 60, I may need them later (hope not) but not now and hopefully not ever. Stay strong...keep the faith and keep coming back!!
I figured you you had heard it before..figured would not hurt to post it again. I am almost 90 days clean this time and about 8 weeks the time before. I am determined this is my last rodeo for the pills. Working on the ciggies now! I think that will be even harder. Addiction is in my family (alcohol). I never had that problem..hated it and most drugs. I tried my share in college and walked away like it never happened. But these opiates...man they grab hold and stick like superglue. At 60, I may need them later (hope not) but not now and hopefully not ever. Stay strong...keep the faith and keep coming back!!
I didn't take anything stronger than an aspirin until I had knee surgery when I was in my mid-thirties. Even then they made me feel queasy so I didn't take many of them and threw the rest away. I had both of my children naturally and didn't take anything afterward. In my early '40's I started having bad pain in my neck and shoulders and getting bad headaches. After a couple years, was diagnosed with degenerating vertebrae, a compressed disc (now two), bone spurs, and calcification of the nerves in my neck. Lovely. So, I began pain management. For a while I was able to take the meds as prescribed, sometimes even less. However, after some time it began to take more and more meds to get the same relief. I finally quit cold turkey in November, 2011.
It will take time (I know it is frustrating when people say that) yet it will get better. Littlebit's post is spot on.
You can do this. I'm rooting for you :)
It will take time (I know it is frustrating when people say that) yet it will get better. Littlebit's post is spot on.
You can do this. I'm rooting for you :)
Thanks for the post. I have actually read that one.. possibly on your original post. Even though I have been back on the pills for a while I would still catch myself here reading over the last couple of years and checking out what everyone was doing. I have quit before for a very long period of time and I know it is possible to do it again. And I know it takes alot of time and I also know that most of us in these early days just long for the normal selves we used to be. You are right. I didn't get here over night and I am not gonna get back to me over night either. Oh how I know this ALL TOO WELL... I told someone close to me the other day if there was anything about my life I could go back and change, this would be it. I would never have picked up that first pill offered to me. But as we all know this is not gonna happen so this is just one of those live and learn things I suppose. I am still young and so are my kids .. I am thankful that I have not wasted decades on this rollercoaster like some people I know and that is a positive that helps me think differently. I do know someone who was doing this for years and years and eventually died from liver failure. So I also think about her alot as I know she might still be here had it not been for the pill addiction. These things certainly are no respector of persons. I know that all too well too.. this addiction can hit anyone at anytime. I used to hear professionals say that statistically if you are not addicted to anything in your late teens to twenties then chances are you won't ever have an addiction problem. Boy were they wrong, in my case anyway... people need to be more educated on what these things can do to you .. they suck you in and you feel like a slave to them ... it truly is no way to live.... I just want to be ME again... and I know that will happen but only with time. Thanks for the comments, the encouragement really does help...
R u doing any kind of aftercare?Like said above u have to give urself a longer period of no relapses to get ur energy back&get ur body to produce the endorphins u need for real happiness.Have u thought of maybe trying an anti depressant(a seratonin re uptake to boost the production faster for lack of a better way to say it).Ir sure helped me.
Sorry your back in this mess again, your not alone. We all think once we are detoxing that we will NEVER take another pill again. Next thing ya know we are tempted, have cravings, encounter medical problems and before we know it BAM! You know the drill and we are here for support. Time to just hit the pavement and let the healing begin. You'll be in fighting shape again before you know it!
You have to give your body time to reset and right itself. You did not get here in one day and will not reset in one day. I know we want immediate fixes, but the reality is that is not possible. When I posted much the same, this is the first response I got and it did help me understand. Hope it helps you! glad you are back!
You have to remember how opiates work, and why you feel depressed etc. when you quit taking them and after you are over the withdrawals and often why we keep craving long after the physical withdrawals are over.
Opiates bound to the opioid receptors in your brain and body. They release their artificial endorphins to them, and block the bodies natural endorphins. After a while the neurons that produce the body's natural endorphins disappear. There is no need for them so they just don't rejuvenate like they would normally.
When you stop taking the opiates, they leave your opioid receptors bare, and they are calling out for your body's natural endorphins, but there isn't any there at first. You body has to repopulate the neurons that make them, and this takes time.
Endorphins like dopamine control your moods, anxiety, sadness, anger, happiness, pain etc.
You will slowly get your "old self" back as these neurons repopulate and begin increasing their endorphins production. After being off the opiates for a month, they should be about 45-50% of normal, and be back to normal within a year.
So hang in there, you will feel better and better as the months roll by.
Try keep busy and keep your mind focused on positive things instead of dwelling on the depression, anxiety, etc. that are only temporary and will disappear as your endorphins return to normal.
You have to remember how opiates work, and why you feel depressed etc. when you quit taking them and after you are over the withdrawals and often why we keep craving long after the physical withdrawals are over.
Opiates bound to the opioid receptors in your brain and body. They release their artificial endorphins to them, and block the bodies natural endorphins. After a while the neurons that produce the body's natural endorphins disappear. There is no need for them so they just don't rejuvenate like they would normally.
When you stop taking the opiates, they leave your opioid receptors bare, and they are calling out for your body's natural endorphins, but there isn't any there at first. You body has to repopulate the neurons that make them, and this takes time.
Endorphins like dopamine control your moods, anxiety, sadness, anger, happiness, pain etc.
You will slowly get your "old self" back as these neurons repopulate and begin increasing their endorphins production. After being off the opiates for a month, they should be about 45-50% of normal, and be back to normal within a year.
So hang in there, you will feel better and better as the months roll by.
Try keep busy and keep your mind focused on positive things instead of dwelling on the depression, anxiety, etc. that are only temporary and will disappear as your endorphins return to normal.
Thank you. And you are right I do already know all the info as I have been through this before. I am taking my vitamins every day and yes I am familiar with the Thomas Recipe. Surprisingly I am not having as much of the physical issues right now. I quit a few weeks ago and except for a few days of slip ups over the last 3 weeks I haven't been on them. The energy and the depression is what gets me every time. I have 2 very spirited sons that are always FULL of energy.. lol.. so as long as I was supermom I was on top of the world. It seems like no matter what I do vitamin wise or change eating habits or excercise or whatever my energy level just stays totally bottomed out. That's where I lose it every time. I know from 4+ years now that the pills were a false sense of the energy I once had. I went through 33 years of life barely even taking a tylenol for an ache or pain. Even when my kids were born, my dr asked me with my first son if I wanted a script for percocet to take home from the hospital and I shot him down always leary of becoming addicted to something. I spent my first 33 years of life afraid of addiction since it's rampant in my family and now here I find myself at 37 dependant on a pill... guess my fears all those years were totally warranted huh? I guess I need to get a grip on the mental part of it all. Knowing that it is a false sense of energy and not what my brain should be producing on it's own. I was such an energized mom before the pills, why is it that I can't seem to see myself ever being that way again? I know that it's different for everyone.. some people feel better within days and others don't feel better for months or years.. but I am so afraid that if I am one of the ones that it takes forever to feel normal again, how much of life am I gonna miss by lying around and feeling like a slug?
Hi and welcome (again)! ;)
I quit cold turkey from about the same amount of hydrocodone as you. I don't know if you are familiar with the Thomas recipe, but there are several supplements and vitamins listed that really do help. The main one is Immodium for tummy troubles. It also helps with other withdrawal symptoms. You probably already know this too, but drink lots of fluids like Gatorade or something similar to replenish nutrients that come out.
You are well on your way with 3 days in. The worst of the physical withdrawal should be over in the next couple of days.
Be thinking about what you will do differently this time. The definition of insanity is to do the same thing over and over, expecting different results. I would recommend some kind of aftercare once you feel up to going. There are even phone and online meetings.
Please keep posting and we'll help you any way we can.
I quit cold turkey from about the same amount of hydrocodone as you. I don't know if you are familiar with the Thomas recipe, but there are several supplements and vitamins listed that really do help. The main one is Immodium for tummy troubles. It also helps with other withdrawal symptoms. You probably already know this too, but drink lots of fluids like Gatorade or something similar to replenish nutrients that come out.
You are well on your way with 3 days in. The worst of the physical withdrawal should be over in the next couple of days.
Be thinking about what you will do differently this time. The definition of insanity is to do the same thing over and over, expecting different results. I would recommend some kind of aftercare once you feel up to going. There are even phone and online meetings.
Please keep posting and we'll help you any way we can.
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