Methadone is NOT a lifesaver people!!

[Sweetness91]

I get so infuriated when I read a post by someone who is talking about trying to get off methadone and in comes a commenter who sings it's praises and acts like its holy water. Those are the ones who have obviously not had it affect their body negatively yet, or affect their life I a negative way. So let me tell you what you can expect, should you decide that methadone is going to save your life.....

When I was put on methadone 8 years ago, I too, thought it was a "wonder drug"....I didn't have to take much to be pain free, of course I knew nothing about a drugs half-life at that time either. (No wonder it worked so well at first...half-life of methadone, up to 60 hrs...half-life of Vicodin, approx. 4-5 hrs..) So I started out at 20 mgs a day and did fine...for about 3 months. Then it was increased. And again it only helped a few months and had to be increased...again and again.

During the time I was on it, I had chronic bronchitis, and pneumonia at least once a year (at the ripe old age of 32) and landed in the hospital for days with the pneumonia. I also suffered from double hernias, because I didn't realize how far I was pushing my body, so had surgery to repair those. Then a few years ago, became very ill with stomach issues. Ended up having exploratory surgery to find that I had a collapsed lung, peritonitis and that my appendix had ruptured. All for methadone. Great huh?? The surgeon told me that my colon was bigger than a softball, and normal size should be about the size of a tennis ball...another great effect of the opiate. He also told me if I stayed on the course I was on, that I would NOT live to 60. That absolutely scared the hell out of me...but yet I stayed on it another 3 years because I was afraid of living w/o it and afraid of the withdrawal. But let me say, the exploratory surgery recovery was far worse than I'm experiencing now.

Now lets talk about how it affects you mentally....at first, nothing can touch you...oh yeah, because it "saved your life"....but soon....very soon...it grabs ahold of all your emotions and feelings and hides them away to where YOU can't even find them. Then you start leaving the house less and less. But that's ok, still got the methadone right? THEN, you don't leave the house at all...unless you absolutely have to! You stay up all night and sleep til noon or later every day, then when you do roll yourself out of bed, you plop your a$$ in front of the tv all day, because surely the house will clean itself...but even if it doesn't, who cares??  Then your family starts to wonder what's happened to the person they once knew...and they start begging you to bring that person back...but once again, who cares?

And THEN, that moment of clarity...that moment when you realize how different things are than they were before the methadone...and how different they COULD be...that moment when you realize just how jealous you are of ppl who get out and live their lives to the fullest.  And you know it's just within reach....but ohhhh the terrible withdrawals you would have to go thru to be like them.

I'm here to tell you, it's not as terrible as it sounds. Sure, everyone gets on here and moans n groans about the w/d's, but this is like our bit€hfest page...it makes some feel better to just SAY how bad they feel, but it really is like a bad case of the flu, an extended flu, but the flu! You sat in front of the tv all day while you were on methadone, why not sit there while you're getting off it and recover?

I know I tend to ramble, and write books, lol, but it really does irritate me when someone tries to push methadone here...this is for ppl wanting to get OFF the crap. It is not ok to sing praises of a "wonderful drug" to someone who is stating they want off drugs!!  Sorry ppl...just had to vent!

[gnarly_1]

If your slamming a needle in your arm every day methadone is better then that but it should never replace pills.....I was originally dragged in  with a last resort sota pain management I think the doctor new I was abusing by then after 10 yrs of pain pill use he put me on methadone and steroid shots when the steroids dident work anymore and where causing scare tishue hi simply kicked me to the street at 90 mg I couldent find another doctor to per scribe it to me so I went to the clinic as a last resort I stayed at the clinic for 5 more years uping my dose several time finally I got out of the insanity and tapered off.....after using methadone almose 8yrs I find nothing good in it .....I even found a heroin addict once told me he would rather kick heroin 3 times then methadone once it is truly an evil drug bottom line is if your not slamming a needle in your arm you dont need it I hope people head the warning from all of us.............................Gnarly  

[HookLineandSinker68]

Methadone is a killer.. On it 8 days, high as a kite/ if you want your free high, it's great. But looking to get your life back, this is horrid awful. Your get your life stuck with one of the most powerful and hard to get off of drugs...40 mgs for 8 days stopped went into withdrawals 4 days later. Read about it, watch methadonia documentary. That will give you your answers.  

[VICourageous]

Hi again very interesting comments gang since I am new to this site. I started doing drugs when I was 14yrs off and on until I came clean at 56 I had walked away from all drugs without even knowing what a withdraw was until I stated taking pain pills from dr. when I took the methedone for the first time 12 yrs ago I was so afraid of the withdraws I cried out for 10 yrs lost. When I came clean I wanted that evil drug gone for a very long time. I now have a little bit of mixed feelings but for me it is a evil drug........ I like what evreryone says no matter what they feel like at the time. It will be good to look back at what we say as time goes on but most of us share our recovery.
God Bless us all give it away stay clean its great
vvicidaho

[Sweetness91]

I'll do that Pat...I made a couple calls and couldn't find anything out so I'm going to try again tomorrow...really need to ease my mind a little. I dont know...I just keep thinking that could've been my father or grandfather.

Hopefully a good nights sleep will come to me tonight...Mr. Sandman...bring me a dream...where ARE you!! Lol.

And you are oh so right about the emotions coming back...full force in my case. I've been speaking my mind alot more lately...I'm not sure if its a good thing or not. I will say I've been somewhat of a doormat over the last ten years because I just didn't care really...I wouldn't say sh*t if I had a mouth full of it...but I'm not so silent anymore though! Maybe it'll get me somewhere...who knows. But either way, I kinda like being able to tell it like it is. :)

[Pat1956100]

Please let us know when you find out and I am praying it is good news.  Thanks for letting me get some therapy on your thread lol.

Weaver, I was such a mess when I first found this site.  I was so terrified and people were so wonderful to me (still are).  They put up with my madness and have helped me through so many emotions and setbacks.  We do have to understand everyone who is going through the same.  I hate how I still react so quickly and then cool off quickly.  Our emotions do come back but we still have to learn how to control them.  I am lucky people have been so forgiving of mine.  Sometimes it's good though in the real world.  I'm not getting walked all over, like I did when I was on pills.  I just couldn't be bothered to deal with things.  It is nice to feel again.

[toothfairie]

weaver, i've done the same thing.....gone back and looked at my posts couple months ago....wow.....what a mess i was....still am to a degree, but soooo much better!  still crazy but in a good way!  lol  and you're right, progress not perfection!