My AA Meeting Last Night-Not Great

[bettie1976]

So last night I went to the meeting closest to my house, a 2 mile drive if that. I sat down and saw my (ok now bear with me) my 2nd ex husbands ex girlfriend (she got to put up with his $hit after I kicked him out).  When he broke up with her she stole all my daughters xmas presents he had for her and just basically pissed me off. She F'd with my kid man. Ya know? Yea yea, forgive and all that but she got her 18 month coin last night and yet Ive seen her runnin around town with her ex tweaker boyfriend. Im not going to judge and thats not what Im getting at here, just giving you some background. She still talks to my ex online and I felt SO uncomfortable talking about my stuff there because I know shell go and run her mouth to him and we have an 8 year old together. Granted, he could never get custody b/c he's never done a thing for her and shes been with me always since she was born but right now shes with him and his parents in another state for vacation. Plus he'd never want custody. But SINCE Ive had one child stolen from me, I was very quiet at the meeting. So was my bf when I told him the deal. So we found new meetings in a new town (which kinda sucks but oh well) and thats that. But how do ya like that? Small town of 20,000 people and people TALK TALK TALK! Im not ashamed of going into treatment to help myself but I dont want my ex to know about it, ya know? I dont trust many people right now.

[mom2rachie]

My sponsor tells me to pray for those who are geting on my nerves also.......I HATE it but I do it.
It does help lift the resentment some.  You should look at those people as people who are sick witha horrible disease because that's what addictionn is and even though you don't have to be-friend them, take pity on them because they probably will never find true peace and happiness and you can so you're much better off.  It's hard to be angry and grateful at the same time.....

[bettie1976]

thanks!

[dfr3]

hi i feel for you!!! i have been going to AA meetings for 10 years a believe me i have had my share of cr-p!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  but when your child is involved the mother bear claws come out.  recently i had my dad take something from my kids [his grandkids] and i tell you i was livid.  i have no relationship with him over it, and i was going thru cancer treatment at the time, like i needed this!!! my sponsor always tells me to pray for him and i do, {i don't mean it} but i pray, she sais if i pray for him for two weeks  my anger and hatred for him will go away.  i have tryed this with other people and i never seem to get passed week one.  but i will try this time.  people expecially family can really su-k!!
i was told GOD puts people in our life to learn a lesson. I wish i knew everything already.
hang in there things will get better, if misery likes company you have got a lot, just on this site  ha ha

lol jill

[bettie1976]

Thanks for the feedback. I talked to my ex and casually asked him if he talked to her anymore. His words were "no, I dont have time for fat-a$$ drama bs". So Im gonna keep on going. We went to a meeting in the next town last night and (boing!) only 5 people showed up (including the speaker and the chair person). BOOORRRRIIIINNGG, Im just hoping my man got something out of it.

[retiredrn]

yrs ago I went to a AA mtg, the next day I'm at work and my client goes, oh, weren't you at the mtg last nite, in front of everyone, no anonomynity(sp?) at all, so I can definately relate to small towns.

[mom2rachie]

BUT.... I don't blame you.  I never went to meetings in the town I lived in.  I knew too many people that went in on a monday after a bad weekend of drinking and then started back up with the **** on thursday so I thought it best to find a whole other area for my support.  Besides, seeing her there will only lead you to have a major resentment and be closed off to any messages you might need to hear there.

[mom2rachie]

I was taught by my sponsor that you share about your issues (not personal) as it relates to alcoholism or drug use or what the speaker shared and save the very personal issues for your sponsor or support group.

[Two222]

You did the right thing by going to another meeting. I've always recommended N/A. i really don't think anyone can stay clean without it, but their are people there who are interested in other things besides helping others say clean. Some are there to socialize, some are their for power trips, some are there for the coffee (and thats okay), and even though is anonymous, people can have big mouths and still blab about what they hear. Lucky for me I live in Las Vegas, where we have about 3,000 meetings going on all over the valley everyday, and so I don't have to run into many people I know.