My son is detoxing from almost 1 month of heroin use

[Adoremyson]

Hi All,
I'm new to this forum but have been lurking for a few days and have been impressed by the support and compassion offered here.

I thought I was trying to educate myself for my sweet niece, 25 yrs old, ~5 yr Heroin habit, and now living on the streets after 1 failed 28-day in-patient detox and rehab 2 months ago. This has been devastating to my sister, my mom and I. Nobody has heard from her for several weeks. (My sister was about to go over the edge, so finally ended up starting on anti-depressants and anti-anxiety drugs. I dislike anything pharmaceutical, but I know it was better than the alternative for her.)

However, now I have another interest in being here. I just learned that after 1 year clean and making huge progress in his life, my 20-yr old son relapsed on Heroin for almost a month and just called to share this with me, and ask if he could come home and quit cold turkey, with my help. I would have never ever though this would happen, and it's devastating news, but I am happy that he caught himself and resolved with every fiber of his being to quit, because today he graduated from technical training, top of his class, interviewed with several companies yesterday, and has opportunities for great jobs ahead. He has every reason in the world to get off asap, so I know he's highly motivated. He's already been offered one job but is holding out for the best. He just has to get clean fast... but the right way, so he is really healthy mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually.

He will be starting tomorrow, using in the morning, working a few hours, then 3-1/3 hour bus and car ride to my house. I've been frantically trying to read up on every way to be ready to help him through this naturally, if possible. He has been doing research as well.

My question for the forum is, does anyone have any experience with someone withdrawing after only 3-1/2 weeks of smoking lower doses of Heroin? I am hoping to hear that the w/d will be less painful and shorter..?

Any other suggestions for getting through this are welcome as well. I know about all the physical issues, I actually think the depression might be the hardest though?

Thanks for any and all comments, and all the best to all of you. This is a hard road for everyone. But there is light at the end of the tunnel and I pray that everyone gets to that light!  Namaste.

[Pat1956100]

Hi there and welcome
I think you are awesome and that your son is very lucky to have you as parents.  It is wonderful that he can be so open and honest with you.  I'm sure he doesn't want to disappoint you so being accountable to you will help him in the long run.
I can understand him wanting to be with you.  Withdrawals are very scary and some compassion from you will help with the depression especially.
Please let us know if we can help in any way and tell your son to come on and chat with us if he feels up to it.  There's always questions and concerns going through this.

Hugs
Pat

[weaver71]

My meetings encouraged me to go, even when I had to sit by the door, in case I had to hurl. It was good for reminding them of what it is like, and it was good to wake up, or regain my consciousness, surrounded by support who gets it. From my experience, the sooner he goes to meetings the better.

[Adoremyson]

Thank you all so much for the advice and support! He will be here tonight, just starting w/d. I'm going to the store to get supplies, so thanks so much for the tip on the Thomas recipe. I will look at that right away.

Definitely understand about the healing that is needed after the w/d. We both know about the depression, etc. so meetings will be important. I'm wondering how soon can he start going... like on day 6 of w/d maybe?

God bless you all for the help you give. I hope someday I can help other moms in this situation.

[weaver71]

It is impossible to say if his detox will be easier. Addiction is progressive, when we start to use again, our brain picks up as if we never stopped using. His brain has memory of how it responded to drugs before, so it can go right back into that state quickly, no matter how long one has been clean. Heroin physical detox is about a week, but the reasons we used and the mental detox take some time and work to build a strong relapse prevention plans and coping skills. Quitting drugs is the first step in a loooong process, it is often described as the easy part. Staying clean, as he just learned, is the hard part. He won't be physically ill for a long time, though the real healing only begins, after that.

[jifmoc]

Hey there. Okay, firstly a big YAY on the AA/NA for him and the alanon for you. Honestly, that is the biggest route to success...for all of you. There is no way I'd be clean (for me, vicodin) w/o being part of the program. So good for you.

Yes, good call on saying no to subs. That is yet another drug he will need to withdraw from so better just getting it done in a couple of weeks. To answer that question, there is no way to know if it will be a "better" detox. Just plan on the usual physical symptoms (sweating, shaking, nausea, vomiting, insomnia etc.) Look up the Thomas recipe on here and tell him to get the stuff on there before he comes to you. Again, the detox will be a mere blip compared to his whole life, where he needs to learn to live w/o drugs. That's where the focus needs to be. Take it from us who have been there!

You wrote:
." The only thing that scares me is I heard an addict say they scored their next hit from someone at a meeting.... my husband is also concerned about him being immersed in that environment, and says why can't he get involved with people who are busy advancing their lives who have nothing to do with drugs, and keep his mind busy with productive, non-drug-related things? "

I can see how as non-addicts you both would think that. But oh boy, it doesn't work that way. Your hubbie needs alanon, too. He seems to not understand addiction. If a fulfilling, productive life was the answer to drug addiction, there would be no addicts. Phillip Seymour Hoffman would still be alive. So would John Belushi. You get the point. Don't be worried about scoring at meetings. I have never experienced anything like that, neither has anyone I know. I suppose it could happen but that's like don't go on an airplane, it could crash. Same concept.

Btw, for your niece, I'm sure it's so scary not knowing where she is. I cannot tell you how many folks I met at meetings who were in her situation and it was their "bottom" and it made them WANT to get they got help. So, you never know what could be the best thing for someone. No matter how exciting a job opportunity is or a relationship or whatever, the addiction will come first if not properly arrested. We do that by getting major support. I have absolutely zero external reason to abuse painkillers. Great, loving family, money, education, absolutely no addiction in my family, yet l'm an addict. As they say it's "cunning, baffling and powerful."

Your openmindedness will be a GREAT asset to you. So good for you. As you've prob read, folks post constantly, so post as much as you want. There is so much knowledge on here. It just will come in a few hours:)