Hi and welcome!! Congratulations on Day 6!!!!
For me it got better everyday after day 5.... and it took a few months of that happening until I realized that I finally did feel better!!! It is different for everyone though... Are you doing any kind of aftercare to help you through this? It is so important to start learning new ways to live and deal with life. That is what has helped me from going back to using!! You really will feel better!!! Keep hanging in there and keep on posting!!! ♡
The complete lack of energy was the longest lasting symptom for me. Everyone is different. While I would feel better each day, the fatigue was bad for about 10-12 days for me. It might sound odd, but the only thing that helped was getting up and going for walks.
Thank you so much for the encouragement, it is greatly appreciated!! I am not currently doing any aftercare because nobody besides my husband knows what I am currently dealing with. I have a wonderful family but lets just say they are not so supportive when it comes to this kind of thing. Today I physically feel a little better but the mental aspect is becoming a problem. Trying to justify in my head why it wasn't so bad what I was doing.
That is my biggest problem also as I have a full time job & 2 kids highly active in competitive sports. I am trying to push through but by the time 7:30-8pm hits I can no longer fake it.
I don't think you'll have as long of a problem with the fatigue as I did based on the different med I was on. You should start feeling better soon. It may or may not help you, but thinking "i made it to day 6, I don't want to have to start over" kept me focused on not taking anything. I didn't want to have to start over knowing I would have to go thru it again. Do you have a friend you can trust enough to tell about this so you can have someone give you a boost when needed?
My husband has been incredibly loving and supportive. I have found this time with someone to hold me accountable it has been much easier to not go back to using. I am taking your advice and celebrating every day clean and reminding myself that I don't want to start over again. Tonight at 9:00pm it will be 1 week since I took my last pill
Hi Heated - I'm in the exact same boat. Only my husband knows and for my norco abuse - I even hid most of that from him for two years. I confessed everything to my husband two weeks ago. I'm now one week off norco and tramadol, but I have a couple others that I'm almost off (weening).
I just posted about finding a meeting or support but I must have it anonymous.
Yesterday was my first walk. It felt wonderful..sun was shining. It was a short walk but it definitely helped with fatigue. Add that to my continued baths at night and I finally slept last night. We need to get out and force ourselves to exercise even if we don't feel up to it. We need natural endorphins back in our brain after pills.
Stay in touch! Until we get into meetings we need this online group more than ever!!
I agree, I always read about everyones experience on these forums but never thought posting about myself would help. I was wrong! Even though my husband has been great, he has never been through this and I find it has helped to get advice from others who can relate to what I am going through. I also did the tramadol, not for the feeling but to keep from getting sick. I have yet to work up to taking a walk, although it is on my agenda, but I did do some housework last night and found that it did lighten my mood a little. The hot baths have been a big help! Physically I am feeling better today, still waking up with a slight headache but nothing that tylenol and a coffee won't fix. Mentally, I am struggling a little.
Hi heated, I just wanted to add that the difference between STAYING clean and coming back here saying you relapsed is aftercare. All the supportive hubbies and good thoughts in the world won't keep you clean. All of us have tried and tried and tried to get clean before using our own thinking. It never worked. Staying clean is about getting out of your comfort zone. Look where staying in our comfort zone lead us. Remember, this a progressive disease. It gets worse left untreated. Untreated means not addressing the addict brain. Putting down the drugs is only the first step. We need, at the beginning, daily support from other addicts and people that have come before us. It is said that you should go to a meeting as often as you used drugs. So, that means every day for most of us.
I don't even know where to begin with meetings! How do I find one? Do I just go? Do I need to call before?? I'm so lost in all of this. I am realizing more & more that the physical sickness is not the hardest part about this. I think that the biggest obstacle that I face with the meetings is that I am ashamed. I don't know how I let myself become this.....
I think I need to elaborate and please no one take offense to this, I have had my eyes opened. My thinking was always that drug addicts were uneducated, low income, bad upbringing, just people with no future in general. I don't mean to offend anyone with that, just trying to be honest. I now have a great understanding that it can happen to anyone. The sincere advice and encouragement I have received on here has been a great help!! I'm now on the other end of the same thinking I once had and let me tell you it is severely humbling!
Haha! No offense taken. It can happen to anyone and until I ended up an addict I thought the same as you. I was the perfect kid, the star student, the overachiever. I used on my way up the corporate ladder and I have a very stressful job. I'm an executive at my company. I look like the model couple in a nice house. Everything looks perfect on the outside. I am an addict. I thought I could beat if by using recreationally (pills just like a couple glasses of wine). We trick ourselves since we can be successful that we are different.
We are NOT different..and you are not alone. Yes, jifmoc - need aftercare, but petrifying. I will figure a way.
Heated - the mental hitting me hard too. It's a daily process. We can do it!! (But we need meetings :))
Aww hell, heated, we ALL thought that drug addicts were low class gross outs BEFORE we became one ourselves. I'm educated and had a very loving backround and so are most of the folks that I know in my meetings. I'm in LA, and we have famous actors, head of studios etc. here. There are so so many people in meetings that I aspire to be like, it's incredible.
Yes, just look up either AA or NA for your area. Pick a meeting and GO. Trust me, there is nothing you can say that will freak anyone out. Every single one of us were beginners once too when meetings felt like the Twilight Zone. That changes quickly.
So you...and Katie...GO. Let us know how it goes, okay?
Hey. Congrats on the week. That takes some real effort and struggle. Your physical symptoms are on the down hill, but your brain is not going to be satisfied for a while. Taking really good vitamins, hot baths, some activity (slow walking) will all help. I am not a doctor, but those are what seems to help. If you would like an outlet, there's free support meetings... Different from AA and NA, called SMART recovery. There are on line forms and mtgs. No one would know. It will help you learn about how and when. Help you stay safe
I just want to say thank you to all of you! You have been extremely helpful, nice and supportive. I have a few questions that maybe you can help me with. I've read that xanax can help with the night problems, is this true or is this just a way to prolong my wd's? Also, I have chronic migraines and always am prescribed a narcotic for the pain, what do I do? I have had a discussion with my husband that when this happens he will keep control of them and give them to me as prescribed. Is this a realistic expectation?
Heated, well of course xanax would help you sleep because it's a benzo. But, xanax is THE most addictive benzo there is. You really really don't want another problem and I've been told that xanax wds make opiate wds looks like a picnic. You are already a week in. Sleep is the last thing to come back. You just need to be patient and remember that by numbing ourselves for years we were gonna have to pay the piper eventually. So, this is it. The more clean time I accrued the more I realized that for every single thing that ailed me, mentally or physically, I looked for what pill I could take. I forgot that most people out there don't do that.
You can try melatonin and/or magnesium but at a week or so clean you are still in detox and should not have high expectations for feeling all better. You will, it's just very slow. Patience is rough for addicts; we want it now.
Re: the migraines. Again, the more clean time you get and support you receive you will find that many people that have pain, chronic pain even, that have found that their pain levels have improved since getting off opiates. There is a rebound effect that happens when we are on opiates for so long. Give yourself time to see what is really going on w/ yourself after you've been clean for a while. Opiates mask everything, so you may find you are healthy than you think.
Hi I get migrains also the drug that I use in imatrex it is nonaddictive and really helps most ins will only pay for 9 a month it is expensive but one usually does the trick ask your doctor for it you dont want to have to do this over.................Gnarly.................................
Hey there - don't take Xanax if you can help it. Doctors give it out too easily, but it does help with the nights. I'm currently addicted to Xanax and trying to ween (going surprisingly well tapering), but I regret starting this drug ..soooo much!!. It began with the huge stressful job..situation issue..doc gave me a few. I had the same doc put me on 3 months of ambien and that threw me into full blown panic attacks. Ambien has similar chem makeup of Xanax. So I also hate ambien.
My advice similar to others..try Epsom baths right before you go to bed. Take couple ibuprofen and maybe some Benadry. If nights keep being problem then doc can prescribe but stay away from ambien class and benzos.
There are many people who can take a couple Xanax and never get addicted, but coming off what you are ..you are more vulnerable to falling into new bad habit that can then become an awful addiction. Xanax truly *****!
There are many forums that will say to get a few Xanax and it helps in beginning but this forum more conservative which is best if you can avoid the benzos. They serve a valid medical purpose for those with panic attacks but at max a few pills a month not the scripts I got to take daily for years. Grr!
Hang in there! Keep us posted on headaches, nights and overall how you are doing!
I'm on day 9 and 8 (hydro/trams).. I don't know about you but after repeatedly trying and failing this is the longest. Mentally still struggling but my brain has moments of such clarity that it's amazing!
Just have to take one hour at a time..one day at a time..no pills!! (The reflex to reach for my bag to get meds is driving me crazy but also reminder that I got through it - not a slave to meds).
Ok, so I had a small victory last night!!! After reading what all of you said about taking xanax, I trashed them and decided to try going to sleep on my own. I succeeded!!! It took me about an hour but I finally got there and got a decent night sleep!! YAY! This is the first time in YEARS that I have went to sleep without medicinal assistance! I also was on Ambien for years, due to the fact that I can't shut my brain off in order to fall asleep. After one night of being, ummmmm, intimate with my husband and no recollection of it in the morning, I got off of it.
Here's the double edge sword for me and what started my addiction to Lortab/Norcos: I have only one kidney. After I lost my kidney about 8 years ago, I was told that ibuprofen was absolutely out of the question, even medicines with a ibuprofen like generic. So because Tylenol is as worthless as taking a piece of cardboard, they started giving me the narcotics for everything. But at the same time, I can remember a time when I had 3-4 bottles of Lortab in my medicine cabinet that I never touched and actually expired because I just used them when they were truly needed.
I think you are all right though, because even though I feel like crap with the wd's, the pain/sickness I thought I was taking the pills for aren't really there!
P.S. Apparently a good nights sleep is good for my overall mood!!! :)
I understand about the reflex to grab for the bag. I kept mine in my purse and always kept that thing right by my side at all times. Its weird to not have to obsessively worry about my purse!!!
Yay!! Way to go. I found with my neck/back that I have had way less pain off hydros. I had read about pain meds screwing up our pain receptors and causing even worse pain, but didn't believe it. I now am feeling so much better off everything. And I'm hooked on baths to help with neck/back and my tension headaches.
Sorry you had to go through losing a kidney, but glad you are doing better and on your way to a much healthier life.
Have you looked into meetings? I found one, but haven't gone yet. I am going to try this weekend. Scared but need to take this next leap. Today was mentally a tough day and I know meetings will help.
Funny about our bags. How did our husbands not catch on? Lol. I took my bag with me even going from one room to another..iPad, bag and cell. I even took it up to sit right by my side of the bed. Now I am free of needing to know where pills are every minute of day. I'm dreaming about pills which is annoying but still feel so free.
Day 10 - no pills and about 40 baths later. :)
I hate to say it but my husband was slightly aware of what was going on. He was getting me a couple every weekend because he thought I was just doing them as a weekend thing. I was going behind his back during the week and getting them. After I was completely honest with him about how bad it was he was highly upset with me for lying to him. However, he has cut me completely off and WILL NOT get me anything, even in my moments of weakness when I feel I can't take it anymore. He always kind of hated that I did it because of my medical issues but I can be pretty persuasive when I need to be. I don't blame him, I even feel bad for putting him in this position to unknowlingly help with my addiction. He has been a great support through all of this and very encouraging.
I have done a little looking into meetings, I'm still working through my pride on going to one.
I had another good nights sleep last night and woke up this morning with no headache. I still have the sweats & chills slightly but they seem to be improving every day. The mental part is getting better everyday. I have a very active family, so not alot of time to sit with my own brain and make it worse. I have been involving myself in my childrens sports more which they seem happy about. I was always involved but I would never get out there and warm up with them or toss the ball around. Last night I took my daughter to her practice 45 minutes early and spent that time on the court with her. It felt good!!! Side note: my lack of doing anything physical was highly apparent last night when I went for a ball and managed to roll the sh*t out of my ankle!!!! LOL It does hurt but I don't find myself using it as an excuse for a pill. That excites me!!! I CAN DO THIS!!!! :)
Nice going!! Well, not the twisting your ankle part but getting out and getting active. Great!! Glad you didn't seriously hurt yourself. :)
My brain feels spazzing lately. I feel normal one minute and then almost manic the next then sort of depressed after realizing that I feel "off"...then back to normal. Have you felt like your brain isn't functioning the same? I notice it the most when I'm trying to just have a normal conversation with someone at work. Ugh..so annoying.
One more day...I have to say I can see why it is one day at a time. If I think too long term it is a bit overwhelming when I have days like today. At least it is Friday. I need a weekend.
My hubby hitting a resentful phase just last couple days. It is now hitting him that I hid the norcos for so long and he made comments about trusting me again. I lied and manipulated a lot..and he is realizing it more and more as he remembers different things. I feel bad but not much I can do now but be honest. He said he won't know if I decide to lie again. It's tough. :(
Glad you are doing well! Keep it up.
Hey guys, so I messed up royally and I need to vent about it! I ended up taking 2 pills last night due to an extreme migraine that I contribute to stress and too much overthinking. I am pissed at myself and completely regret it, this only furthered my determination to get away from this addiction. I am worried now that I will start the wd's all over again, I really hope I don't but if I do thats what I get for making a stupid decision! :(