Opiate Withdraw....I'm DYING here!

[Baridon]

This is soooooooo rediculous.... I was a heavy heavy opiate user on and off for 10 years, went on Suboxone for about 4-6 months, and tappered myself off for about 3-4 days off of the Suboxone and I FEEL TERRIBLE!! Diarreah, yawning, sneezing, no fever anymore, eyes watering, fatigue, depressed, and the worst part- my LEGS feel like thier in a vise grip and being squeezed to the breaking point. I have to do breathing exercises in order to simply STAND UP.
I've been off opiates for 6 months, and Suboxone (basically OPIATES) for a little over 2 WEEKS now and I STILL can't shake this!! I'm DYING here!! :( Any ideas on my LEG PAINS? Oh my Lord they are killing me 24/7!! :_( This is so hard... I can't believe I got myself into this....So stupid....

[Svengolly74]

Hope this helps becuase it got me off the ****. this is what you need to get.  Get some OTC analgestic like asprin or acetaminophen.  first generation sedating antihistamine like diphenhydramine (Benadryl) or meclizine (Dramamine II).  Get a 2 week supply of Loperamide Hydrocloride (Immodium AD).  It's structurlly related to the opioid meperidine but does not cross the blood-brain barrier.  It acts on opiate receptors in the intestines and stops spasma and therefore diarreah.  Take a doubble dose as your body will not be effected by single doses like take 8MG per dose.

Get with your DR about getting some Clonidine for blood pressure and some Klonopin for the anxiety.

[Baridon]

I have to admit....in my profile it says I'm from WI, but I'm actually close to the boarder (Mexico). I went to Mexico, picked up 10 5mg Vicodens...I took 6 today. I have 4 more. And I will admit that I WILL take the last 4 in the morning. I'm literally teary eyed right now because I am such a selfish person and I forgot that if I would have got caught for having 5 Vicodens at the boarder, I would have LOST MY FINANCIAL AID, went in default and would have lost ALL my dreams that I share with my wife. I can't believe even the thought of that and I didn't even THINK about it!! I am a very honest person and I will tell you that I have been clean (other than today) for almost 40 days from very hard drugs, but I will take the last 4 Vicodens when I wake up and I don't think I'll have w/d's at all because of the last dose. Like I was saying, I JUST WANTED TO FEEL NORMAL FOR ONE DAY....And here I am, depressed, feeling selfish, realizing I almost lost my LIFE dreams, a hypocrite, I'm at a loss gnarly_1. It's not my body- it's my MIND. I was having non-stop dreams of taking pills and I gave in. I'm sorry. I feel like a fake everyone. But I can tell you this with all of my heart- I WILL NOT EVER DO THAT AGAIN!! I'm just so......Damn this addiction.... I'm sorry if I let anybody down. I can't believe myself..

[gnarly_1]

HEY DUDE your an addict until you start treating the disease you going to use every time you crave or at lest a lot of the time the detox is just the beginning it is ez to get clean but tuff to stay clean hook up with some form of aftercare theres lots of stuff out there we always recamend N/A or A/A because its free its every where and it has worked for many of our members including myself so pick yourself up dust your self off and get pluged in ....the soner the better as addicts we need to change the very way we think and react to outside triggers this is all tough at meetings 1 day isent going to throw you into withdrawalsls but it will destroy your confidence to do this remember this is a battle one or lost in ones own mind
good luck and God bless........Gnarly  

[Baridon]

Hey everyone,
So because I'm recieving my masters and am on "summer break" and because I had the day off- I RELAPSED!!!! I CAN'T BELIEVE MYSELF!!!! I took 5 Vicodens....Got too high, thought I would puke and now I just feel ashamed and pissed at myself. I don't believe I'm going to go through w/d's but I do feel like the "urge" is going to keep coming until my mind is strong enough. I'm so embarrassed. I'm such a loser. I just wanted to FEEL better for ONE DAY. I had the day off from work and (like I said before) I'm on summer break for a few more weeks.....So I did it......
GOD....I am so sorry everyone. I'm a hypocrite....An idiot...And an addict. I don't know what else to say. I'm such an idiot.... -Baridon-

[harry501]

Stay well away from tramadol. That is very decent advice. *** for tat! Well done for the days you've lasted and the very best of luck to you in the future.

To REGNOLD, that is fantastic news. keep it up. Guys like you will hopefully be the inspiration I need to quit my habit.

Thank you.

[tgtiffany]

Glad to hear that you are doing pretty good and found that tylenol helps! haha.  You're so used to taking such hard drugs you don't usually give tylenol a chance at all!  Keep smiling :D

[regnold]

hey eveyone, well i have made it 9 days, stiill not sure if i want to quit, even though i just went thur hell.i feel i cant start up again, but the mind games, and i am still have pain in my knees from surgery, but i cant stop thinking about it, any one going thur it too.thanks.

[MissMalibu]

I know about the dreams I just experienced them.  What is up with that.  I was just taking the pills and drugs in my dream, like it was no big deal.  But when I woke up I was in a panic and mini w/d's. The longtimers said it was a reminder of what I had done to my body,mind, soul and spirit when I was using and that they would go away.  But they seem so real I sometimes can't tell if it was a dream or if I really took the pill. Except for the fact that I have no pills and I am asleep.  Stay tough and the worst is past you. At least physically.  Things will get better.

[ImDONENoMore]

Definitely - you're being really smart staying away from it.  And sadly, there are still a ton of Dr.'s out there who don't know it and give this garbage out like candy.

Great decision - that's all I wanted to say.  :)

[Dane74]

Stay away from Tram, i was on that, and the WD's are worse than opiates!  YES, all my docs were my supplier, it's pretty sad.  I was going to the pain clinic and told him that i want off of all meds handed  him over 180 diluid to flush, and then he gave me a script for tram and klonopin, pretty pathetic huh???  As for SUB, it's a money maker for the docs, I have lost all trust in them.  Please, don't go to the doc, you will only leave there with a script, and you do not want that, Right?

[Baridon]

THANK YOU. I have a friend that I worked with that used to call me saying that his Dr. had him hooked on Tramadol. And I was looking it up (about 5 years ago) and it said NOTHING about addiction.
NOW (years later) I hear people are going through hell and back from w/d from it. Thank you for sharing that with me, last thing I need is 120 Tramadol's to put me back in "the spin cycle." -Baridon-

[ImDONENoMore]

Tramadol was the WORST drug I ever detoxed from.  Please, stay away from it.  I too thought it wasn't a big deal when I first started taking it - when compared to the other opiates I had been on.  And I couldn't have been more wrong.  It was the most horrible withdrawal of my life.

Just wanted to share that.  Good luck to you!

[Baridon]

Yea, I tried Tramadol but it was at a VERY bad point in my life. It was when I got out of the hospital where I was used to literally bottles of hydromorphone, then I went to my first doc, and she gave me Tramadol. I took like 90 in a week and didn't go back. Felt nothing because I was addicted to opiates! All I wanted was morphine in my veins lol.... But hey, maybe no I can ask for it. I'm just afraid to go back to my Dr. because he's going to want to give my Suboxone and I don't know if I'm strong enough to say no......God, y'all feel like your Dr. is your supplier sometimes? I'm purposly staying away from him so I won't get back on opiates.
Right now these stupid vivid dreams have to be the worst though. Waking up THINKING I just took pain meds, then realizing I feel like A@@ and I'm completly sober...........SUX :_(

[dkny_ny]

I love  post you got about haking off the devil.  Sound so true.  remember everyone bears a cross daily and some people have pains like this even not withdrawing.  im going through the exact same right now.  if it wasnt for my legs killing me i think it wouldnt be so bad.,  my doc prescribed tramadol which really did lessen the pain the only trade off was that on tramadol people lose like 20 pounds in a matter of weeks. i dont want to look like a stick figure either so i stopped taking them but they did help. read up on tramadol.  remember im suffering here also hang in there.

[Baridon]

Hello everyone and THANK YOU SO MUCH for your replies! I thought nobody would reply back so I hadn't checked until I got an email saying people replied. God bless you all for caring for someone whom you don't know, but know what they are going through..
First of all, my leg pain (that had lasted for WEEKS- bone crushing pain) nothing helped me :_(. I've taken so much opiates in my life that I just laugh at Tylonol, etc. at this point. Give me 18 30mg. IR Oxycodone and it would go away, but Tylonol? It didn't even cross my mind. MY LEGS ARE FEELING BETTER :). Maybe 75% better than last time I wrote this. Regardless- managable. Kinda. Here's something weird;
Has any of you DREAMED about opiates!?!? I'm having DREAMS that I'm taking opiates and I'm waking up craving them STILL! I never thought I would be having dreams about taking pills. Good lord.
The heated massager- yes, it helps when I can lay down- thank you SO much tgtiffany. BUT, don't keep your legs elevated- for some reason it makes them hurt more (and no blood supply. I learned that the hard way.
Tinabe40!!!!!! DON'T GO TO THE METHADONE CLINIC!!!! I had that opportunity and the state was going to pay for it for the rest of my life if I wanted but I turned them down. It was a hard thing to do, but methadone is never (ever ever) an answer to this. I hpoe you didn't go :/
And hi Gnarly! I haven't spoke with you in a while- I've had a couple conversations with you. I'm not sure what your asking in the first part, but I am very aware that a 4 day taper is not efficient enough for success, but it was all I had left (without paying a Dr. a lot of money not to mention for the Sub too in order to get more) so I used what I had.
I'm an addict (easy to say on a computer- probably impossible to say in person) so when I went on Suboxone I would hoard a few here and there and then take like 4 8Mg tablets at once to get high. Suboxone gets you just as high as herion (I was an addict to that too) and it's the same feeling. I "suppose" Sub does help (cold turkey is worse) but only at the beginning. If you go CT and just "get it over with" it only lasts about a week or so (I've done it a few times), but if you are given Suboxone all it does is make things linger for WAY too long and you end up like me in opiate withdraw for months, having dreams about taking drugs and feeling better and waging a war on your mental state seeing if you really DO have what it takes to quit completly.
I still have clouds following me everyday.. It was dark and gray for months but now it's just a chance of rain (or opiates). And I really hope I never (EVER) go back even though I have this craving....Oh man.....WHAT A BATTLE....Sometimes I want to go back on Suboxone because my Dr. says it's great for opiate withdraw- but I would just put myself right in the same spot and I don't know how many times I can be in this spin cycle. I'm going to check back in tonight, and keep checking in because I didn't know anyone even wrote me back. I thank you all for caring about me....This is a lonely addiction isn't it? -Baridon-

[gnarly_1]

HI WHATdose did you jump at it will make a big diffence in how long this will last also a 4 day taper is like no taper with sub.....sub has a 36hr 1/2 life so what was your dose b/4 the taper also???.........Gnarly

[kimrenee]

Hey Guy,

I am 55yrs. old I have been off the lortab for 93 days today. I can tell you one thing.  You need to be on those knees praying.  I will tell you, it is a test I believe of fighting the devil off our backs.  You just keep God first thru this, he will see you thru this.  I have to remember this daily myself.  Like many have said, the Lord and time, will see you thru.

I am still not back and still have alot of stuff going on myself.  BUT, I know I am way better than day one.  I have used alleve and tylenol, for the pain.  Keep the fluids going on also.  I am praying for all on here cause it is a LIVING HELL ON EARTH, going thru this stuff.

You are going to make it and be much stronger than you are right now.  Hang in there and God be with you always.  

Kim

[tgtiffany]

Have you tried a heated massager?  Lots have said that works.  Let us know what you have tried so we know what to tell you and not say the same things again!  

So glad that you decided to quit though :)  Remember that you will get through this, and these symptoms and feelings are NOT going to last forever okay :)  Keep smiling ;)

[tinabe40]

I wish I had some ideas for you, but all I know to do is to say hang in there. I'm have been thru this once before coming off of lortab use heavy, cold turkey, and just did it. I stayed in bed, and sick til I wasn't sick anymore...about 2 weeks. I am back on tabs again, and thinking of going to a methadone clinic in the morning for the first time, but I am scared because I thought it would be the answer to the horrible withdrawals only to read on this site the withdrawals from quitting methadone are just as bad. I'm sorry for you and the lot of us out here going thru this crap. I hear alot of fluids and vitamins are the answers..and some sort of otc muscle relaxers. All I know is good luck.