You're going to be more than just tired in the coming days. From what you've said, you sound like you're really back in the 40mg per day comfort zone (if you're lucky), but have broken the cardinal rule of tapering: the lower the taper, the slower. You've done just the opposite, with punishing cuts in the last three days. I realize that you did so because your supply was limited. Getting enough of the stuff is one of the biggest challenges of tapering.
I don't want to alarm you, but I think you're about to feel a lot worse than you do now to the point where lack of energy is not your chief concern. Have you ever experienced opiate withdrawal? Based on your posts here, I'd suggest you not make any committments for the next 5 or 6 days. There is an amino acid that will help you regain your mental and physical energy level after acute withdrawal is over. But it will only increase your anxiety if you use it during acute withdrawal. If you like, I can send you a recipe for handling acute withdrawal and, once it's over, recovering your energy and relieving depression. Remember, you've basically gone from 40mg a day to cold turkey. This recipe will not let you hotwire yourself to skip the withdrawal process, but it will help you get through the experience. If interested, write me at ***@****.
Have to agree with Thomas, the lower the slower rule on tapperring is vital. While your better going off at 40mg than 120mg a day but your still gonna feel like ****. If you are committed and you can get more I would suggest going back on your tapper schedule and keep reducing the dose - just swallow whole, not crush/snort. Or you can just tough it out. It will really stink and the next 5-6 days are gonna be bad, but it won't kill you, if you are committed you will make it.
You'll be amazed at how life is without. nod
Hi, I have been right where you are. I know exactly how you feel. I'm a mom to 3 kids and I was snorting 3 80mg. Oxy's for over a year and before that was taking up to 30 Vic's a day. To answer your question a sponsor is someone from a 12 step program who loves drugs as much as you and I do but has learned how to live a good life without them. Believe it or not it is true. I also live in Florida and know of a good addictionologist but he's on the east coast. I also would look at people and say how do they function? Why are they happy, are they really happy? They are all probably taking pills or drinking or coke, something...I thought it wasn't possible to live life without some sort of substance to help. I forgot that I used to function perfectly well before I found the pills. I got so heavy into my dependance on the pills that I continued to take them during my last pregnancy and purposely went cold turkey before a scheduled c-section so the baby wouldn't go into withdrawal. She did anyway but the nurses just thought she had gas. Of course I was on demerol after the section so I vaguely remember being concerned for her. Now that I'm clean things come back to me and I feel like it was a bad dream. My daughter just turned four Dec. 26 and because God must have felt really sorry for me he has allowed her to be an incredible miracle in my life.
If I could I would come over to your house right now and take your 3 year old while you get help. I can not emphasize enough to you that it only gets worse if you keep using. It also is almost impossible to take care of your family and detox at home. Maybe if its done really slowly like the others said, but, I just couldn't ever do that. I was to enslaved to the drugs and I needed it like I needed air. I didn't stop because I wanted to, I stopped for my kids. I would have lost them to HRS if I kept going. It doesn't matter why you stop it only matters that you try. I stopped for my kids but somewhere along the line with the help of God, a twelve step program, and alot of soul searching I found out I was staying stopped for me. I never want to face that humiliation and helplessness again. The good news is Dec. 23 I got one year clean. Life is pretty good and I no longer wonder how others live without drugs. Actually I notice people who are on them. Please please email me @ ***@****. I can't give you a magic cure but I can tell you what I did and do to stay clean. I'll say a prayer for you.
After the night from hell. I gave in to 1 hydro today. Someone offered me 3 20mgs of Oxys, but I declined. Yeh for me! I too live in North East Florida. My daughter is with a friend of mine for a couple of days. I have a persciption for 1mg of clonidine, have not had it filled yet. I have read where that would help. I drank 2 gallons of OJ yesterday and lots of vitamins. Legs are just jumping, and still no energy. I am looking outside thinking that I should take a walk, maybe it would push this **** out of my system faster. I did get info on the Rapid detox today, They want, hope you are sitting down. $7,000 for the program. Well I just keep telling myself that I will persevere. I have to do this for my kids and myself. I think back to when I loved to go white water rafting, horseback riding, camping etc. Now I just stay inside, going out to get groceries, and those damn pills. Tired of chasing them down. Thanks for the posts....They are keeping me going..
Welcome to the forum and congratulations on your recovery. It would be really helpful for a lot of us on the forum if you could tell us all about your recovery, and most important how you manage to STAY clean. I think that is the big worry for many of us, how the heck to stay that way once we get there. Again - congrats - you did it - I'm so happy for you. Love/Peace, Lisabet
You sound determined Jontyra......keep reminding yourself thru this hard w/d'ing period, that their kids want their Mom back.
I'm certain the clonidine would dramatically help you thru some of the hardest w/d's. Remember this hard physical withdrawalling period is finite in time; with each shitty day that passes, that is one less shitty one you will have to go thru!!!
I came off a pretty hefty Oxycodone habit of 4-5 years myself, and now am in my 5th month off percs.....and loving it.
My wife has told her doctor, that she has her old husband back; which of course in turn means my two lit'l ones have their daddy back.
Great job on passing up the Oxy!!!
All the activities that you USED TO ENJOY, will become activities that you ARE ENJOYING again.
Percs No More