Reality Sets In!!!!!!!

[Jayden44]

STILL HAVENT  SLEPT SINCE YESTERDAY STARTED DRINKING AND DOING COKE ROUND 8PM LAST NITE IM SO DAME DEPRESSED AND ASHAMED OF MYSELF OF DOING THIS EVERY WEEK TRYNA ESCAPE BUT ALL IS DOING IS HURTING ME AND MY POCKETS

[Allscrewdup]

Hey Jayden your not alone man, I too grew up at a young age, I had three kids and a house payment when I was 21, I worked 7 days a week for years to survive, I still get overwhelmed and I'm 47 now, still have a lot of people depending on me for a paycheck, and I used for along time because I never thought I could do it all without some help, I know it's hard for somebody your age to understand but the decisions you make now are going to affect you the rest of your life, and they are going to affect your kids the rest of their lives. I thought I would use drugs the rest of my life but I finally got to a point where you are now, And your still young, change your life now before you really get in trouble man. You can do it.

[minn66]

Jayden, I just wanted to welcome you. I am glad you found us and posted. This affects people from all walks of life and all over the world. We are here to support and help you. You can stop this.

Pills helped mask a lot of things in my life. It won't be easy. I sense, though, that you are ready. First, get those contacts out of your phone. Second, is there any way you can take a few days off work with the "flu?" Take some time to get some rest and focus on getting better. I ended up having to take time off because like my daughter said, I'm no good to anyone dead.

We are here for you. This forum has helped me get through many a rough day. Someone will be here to support and help you. I believe you can do this and I will definitely be praying for and thinking of you.

Peace and blessings,

Minn

[Jayden44]

I started my adult life at a young age with the living situations (no father) and being raised by a single mother and being the oldest out of 3.I always did alot for my family but they seemed not to noticed or show me attention love, support, and etc i moved out when i was 17 been on my own since for the last 2 years i been living with my girlfriend and 2 kids i had my first son at 19 and my youngest 6 months ago i work 8-12 hours a day 4-5 days out the week im the only income at the house so everythings is on me i barely have time for anything on my days off i gotta run around do groceries take the kids to the doctors appointments and etc. my girlfriend use to get high till she had my youngest but she always tells me to stop but it aint enough i guess cause i still do it. I would love to go to a rehab to get clean but would not be able to cause i need to work. I feel that im to young to feel this way i have a lot on my plate. AND COKE AINT GONNA MAKE IT BETTER!!!!!! but i still do it i need change

[IwillDoThis]

We'll be here to support you - whether we grew up around it or discovered things on our own we can make a choice to chuck the past and start again.  Every day holds the promise of a new life if you let it.  

My dad was a raging alcoholic so I've always been so careful around alcohol that I wasn't thinking of all the other things I could pick up and usually did at some point.

The past is the past, you are so young you have your whole life ahead.  Jayden you can do this if you really want it.  Do you have any support around you?  Have you ever thought of going to an NA meeting - they are free and all over the country - just a thought.

[Jayden44]

Thanks for the support T i really need it i dnt get it as much or at all

[Jayden44]

My mom was big on drinking so it was always around i started drinking at a early age when i was 13 i tried smoking weed but wasant to big on it , it got me to paranoid i would only smoke when im at home or at a friends house at 14-15 i will drink EnJ (dark liquior) before house partys then it became an every weekend thing through out my 4yrs in highschool when i was 18 i tried an e-pill and i was hooked on that for like 5-7 months till i had a bad trip and till this day it does not give me a good feeling i dont to that anymore when i was 19 i was so stressed out at the time and felt so lost and depressed from them pills i tried coke to escape and for a diffrent high and been doing it since but now when i do it, i dnt even get high like that is like i do it and just start thinking bout all my problems coke has destroyed my life it made me loose someone real close to me from being high on it and making a wrong CHOICE that till this day it effects me coke has killed my confindence my personality and soul. IM DONE with it i need to get it right asap!!!!

[Teri9498]

  Hey Jayden.....I just wanted to send you my support.....my husband also used to do coke years ago and lost everything because of it......he was just starting to go pro cross country motorcycle racing ....lost all that .....he finally had enough, joined the military, and got clean from the coke......then it was the pills years later....now he's completely clean and much more happy.......if you want this bad enough you CAN do it!!...we will be here to support you!!!   Take care............Teri  :)

[Jayden44]

IM DONE I CAINT DO IT ANYMORE IS DRIVING ME CRAZY I SWARE IS LIKE I KNOW THE OUTCOME AND I STILL DO IT I FEEL SO WEAK MINDED IM SO TIRED OF BEING DEPRESSED DAY IN AND DAY OUT IM LETTING MYSELF DOWN ONCE AGAIN BY PUTTING THAT CRAP UP MY NOSE I GOT A DARK DENT IN MY NOSE I HOPE I DNT HAVE TO GET SURGERY I WOULNT BE ABLE TO AFFORD IT I CAINT BELIEVE WHAT I HAVE DONE TO MYSELF I WAS A ACTIVE PERSON PLAYED FOOTBALL IN HIGH SCHOOL LOVED BEING OUTSIDE NOW ALL I DO IS WORK THRU OUT THE WEEK AND ON MY DAYS OFF IS DRINK AND SNIFF.. THANKS FOR YOUR COMMENT THIS MY FIRST TIME ON HERE I NEED SOME HELP SUPPORT SOMETHING SO I CAN GET IT RIGHT

[IwillDoThis]

Just know that when you are ready and you really want to stop - when you know this is no longer working for you and you want to be sober more than your want the drug - we'll be here to support you.

There are lots of people who have been where you are and who have made the choice to stop.  When you are completely fed up with all that is your life right now - make the brave decision to try something new.

I know you are scared - it's ok.  Stick around!