Really Bad Anxiety

[loveandlight05]

I am not an anxious person. In all of my years self medicating with opiates, never once did I want to take an anti anxiety med. But since being arrested, I am nothing but a walking, talking ball of anxiety. I am anxious from the time I wake up until the time I go to bed. It is quite debilitating, actually. I never knew what it felt like to have a panic attack or not want to get out of bed in the morning because the fear is so overwhelming.

Obviously, this is circumstantial due to my arrest and pending legal issues. I have an appointment today with my therapist. I plan on asking him what to do about this issue. I feel like I am going to start unraveling if I don't ask for help before this gets worse. I know that the grand jury should be sending me a court date soon, and I can't think about anything else. I am overcomes with fear and regret all day every day.

I am still working. I am still teaching my students. I have not been fired or put on leave just yet. For a while, I felt like I could fight this. I want my job. I need it to support my family. I was going to fight. Now, I feel like it is inevitable, so why am I fighting? The anxiety is crushing my spirits. For a brief moment last week, I could see the forest through the trees. Now, I can't see anything past impending doom.

[gnarly_1]

HI ...well I got a good remedy for anxiety  it is called  ''lemon balm'' you get it at a vitmin shop it comes with a dropper one full dropper to a cup of camamel tea in about 1/2hr you will notice a difference give it a shot keep posting for support we all want to see you get threw this
..............................................Gnarly.........................................

[Sonrissa]

Hi Sweetie,  I just read your previous posts and learned of your story. First, my heart just breaks for you. I wish that I could physically reach you and give you a huge hug, and a shoulder to lean on. As I was reading, I kept thinking, there but for the grace of God go I. I hope that you will stay strong, and continue moving forward one step at a time.

As far as the anxiety, talking to your therapist is a good start. About the only other advice I can give you is to get outside in the fresh air as much as possible. When I detoxed, I had horrible anxiety and panic attacks. Most of us do, it's normal while detoxing, plus all of this other added stress that you have. The best thing for me was to walk outside in the fresh air. Even just short walks. It really helped to clear my head, and relax me. I would put on some headphones and listen to music, take deep breaths and just walk. I always felt better and calmer when I was done. Try it. I promise it will help.

I truly wish you the best. Take care of yourself. You are so worth it! You will get through this!

[lulu747]

Hi Love-

Yes, I would say that anxiety is probably the worst detox symptom there is.  You also have a lot going on situation wise so it's no wonder you're anxious.  I find that just saying to myself "Okay, so I feel anxious.  I'm not going to die from it."  really helps.  But the BEST things for anxiety are exercise and deep breathing.  Meditating alone is REALLY hard, especially when you are jittery anxious and your mind is going a mile a minute.  I started practicing yoga daily (rigorous yoga in the heat) once I was physically strong enough and it SAVED MY LIFE.  It was and remains, a huge part of my recovery.  Since I have been bed bound and unable to exercise or even drive to a mellow yoga class I've been using the link I will post below.  It is a Yoga Nidra specifically geared towards addiction and pain.  I hadn't slept for days when a friend sent it to me via FB and after using it I slept like a baby.  I plan to use it tonight, on the eve of my major surgery and know it will help me immensely.
I hope it helps you too.
Bless
Lu
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YUtbkEGv5NU&list=UUo6uPgM3J-n69u6iRPro5lw

[Pat1956100]

As previously stated anxiety is a part of withdrawal.  There are some great meditation videos on youtube for anxiety.
Just search meditation for anxiety and lots will come up.
Definitely talk to your therapist about it as well.

[PurrfectlyKrazy]

I agree with all the posters above and can't really add much.  Just remember...all of this is normal AND you also have a lot on your plate right now.  Take time every day to just breathe, try some relaxation techniques up to and including Yoga.  Warm soothing baths to calm the body.  Do you have that friend?  You know the one?  You can call any time day or night and they make you laugh even through the tears?  I have a friend like that and when I get a really, really bad anxiety attack I call her...by the time I'm done laughing the anxiety is gone.  So even if you don't have a friend like that maybe try some comedy...laughter really IS good medicine.

Take care!

[dominosarah]

Anxiety is very common during this period so ask your therapist about some deep breathing techniques.  Those can actually help.  Right now you are scared and the fear of the unknown is creating havoc in that brain of yours and rightfully so.  Do you have a lawyer?  

Just please keep fighting with everything you have.  You are worth it~

[Jinx_777]

i would utilize EVERY tool there is.
it will help your upcoming legal issues.  by going to meetings, seeing a psychiatrist, counseling,etc it shows you are working on you and the chances of relapse are smaller than those doing nothing.
this is especially important because of your position.  if you had to place a bet on one of 2 addicts in recovery, of course you would choose the one working the hardest on recovery.

talk to the doctor about your anxiety.  if they suggest a med, short term, so be it, but just know that taking anything will go against you.

you may feel like giving up right now, but you will regret it in the future.  do NOT give up.  this can effect the rest of your life, so fight and fight hard.

if you didn't feel any anxiety there would be something wrong with you.  what you are feeling is what anyone would feel under the circumstances.

hang in there and use every tool in the toolbox to get yourself back

[gnarly_1]

Hi...the anxzity was bad for me also   it is part of the withdrawal just give it some time and it should go away..I also use a therapist and a substance abuse counselor  but I was '''white knucklin'g'' it rather then living in recovery ...N/A treats the addiction and the addict long after the pills I suggest you try a few more meetings it gives you a place t vent as well as some structure in you life   the 12 steps will help you fix the train wreck our lives have become...you have to go out of your comfort zone but after a few meetings you will see your a lot like everyone there.......................Gnarly..................................

[loveandlight05]

I am new to being a patient of a therapist. I have seen counselors before, but never therapists or psychiatrists. It seems that most people are in one of two categories: anti therapist or pro therapist. I am still trying to figure out what works for me. All I know at this time is that I find the therapy to be therapeutic for me. I feel best after therapy sessions, and NA or AA is kind of making me feel worse right now. I think the individual has to choose which recovery path is best for them. Right now, I like the therapy choice.

[LeapYearGUY]

I can relate! Here's my suggestion: as a teacher, you have surely encountered the occasional unruly student, who acts like an unwanted guest that just won't quit? You need to treat your anxiety the same way you would a large obnoxious child. Be patient but know that you are the adult, and the anxiety is entirely a bad movie that can scare you to death if you let it. One of the greatest gifts of recovery is the unconditional right to live anchored firmly to the present. Yesterday's history—tomorrow's a mystery and with one foot in each, you'll only **** on today. Use recovery and communication, breathing and simple dumb faith (step 2) to treat your anxiety as it occurs. Smile, say, "thanks for sharing" now STFU.
One more thing: beware of well meaning mental health professionals and anxiety medicines. There's nothing wrong with your anxiety, you earned it just ask for help in managing it—without chemicals.