146 Days Norco free and needing surgery...I'm scared!!!

[SJS49]

Hi guys. I am 146 days clean of Norco...I ended up in the ER on Thursday night with the all too familiar endometriosis pain that has been haunting me for the past 10 years. Turns out, I have two chocolate cysts that are kinda big on my right ovary and have to be removed. The ER doctor ordered Morphine for me in the ER and when the nurse came in with it, I refused it (which I have done several times in this situation). I do not like the "high" feeling that Morphine gives me and it makes me panicky. I took a couple ibuprofen but it didn't do much. They gave me a Norco 10/325 in the ER before they took me for my transvaginal ultrasound so I could get through it. When they were discharging me, they gave me a script for 30 Norco 10/325, which I refused and told them I didn't want to even take the script home with me. I have to go in Wednesday morning to have the two cysts removed before they burst, and I have had the same surgery a couple times several years ago, and I know it hurts, and I know that I will need the pain pills for a couple days after the surgery (hopefully it doesn't take as long to recover from the surgery this time as it did last time), but I am scared. I am scared to take them because I don't want to go through the withdrawal again, and I don't want to take them because I have done so good and haven't put a Norco in my system for 146 days. I'm depressed and disappointed in my body for having this disease and for the doctors around here that do nothing about it, although there is no cure, I'm certain they can do something to make it a little better. I have already done the birth control pills, which did nothing, and the Lupron Depot (a form of chemotherapy that is HORRIBLE for your body) three times for 9 months each and it only helped a little when I was doing the treatment. If I end up having to take the stupid pain pills, will it put me back into withdrawal when I stop taking them again, or has my body gone long enough where a couple days should be fine and I can still feel like my awesome self that I feel like now?

[Itsmebkitty]

There are other options for pain management besides opiates. My doctor put me on cymbalta and neurontin after surgery and I can't tell you how much it worked! Also there are some really good pills -NSAIDS that help with woman pains! Talk to your doctor and be upfront. Best wishes!!

[VICourageous]

Hi Girl,
I am so sorry to hear about all of this. The female pain is what got me hooked for so many yrs. I have had a few in & out things done with my Heart and had to take a few pills at the hospital, but took none home. YOU have studied alot about Addiction since you came on here. I think you will be just fine, but do what needs to be done for your safety. I have a Dr in this town that I used to see now & then, he now is a Addiction Dr. He claims that if I ever need any surgery or pain relief that I should get patches of some sort. Taking pills the other way for me can lead me down the wrong road. So far, I am lucky to be Pill free, but you never know what  can happen on down the road, regarding surgery. Take them as-needed and for a very short time. Drink tons of fluids to keep the toxins flushed out. I wish all the best. Ask about what they might have in Patches.
Bless & God be with!!!!

[SJS49]

Thank you Sarah. You are right. Surgery in itself scares me. I went to see my doctor yesterday after work because I am freaking myself out (gotta love having a panic disorder). He gave me 5 Ativan to take last night, and today if I need them because I'm having a panic attack about surgery. He said they can give me versed when I get prepped for surgery in the morning so that I don't panic and stuff and to keep my heart rate under control while I wait to go into surgery. They did that last time I had surgery too, and I was glad they did. I'm definitely psyching myself up over this. He said that he is going to give me a script for 30 5/325 Norco per my request to not have the 10/325 and if I don't use them all, I don't use them all, and if I still need more, then he will prescribe more. I'm hoping that I don't need that many. And I'm so glad that you guys are here to help me do this. I freak out way too much over surgery because I always get afraid that I won't wake up. I haven't taken Ativan in about 6 months, so I am not able to take it at work and function as it makes me really sleepy and "empty headed" feeling, but I will be able to rest and relax and get a good night sleep before my surgery. I'm not a big fan of the way Ativan makes me feel and how I "forget" some stuff while taking it, but at least I never got addicted to it, so it's easy to take and leave. Thank you so much for being here for me. It really helps to talk (or type) this out on here. My fiance talked me down a little last night as did my doctor so I'm not as scared today, but I know myself and I know that after I get off work, I will worry until I am in the hospital. It is a pretty simple little surgery and they do it laproscopy so at least I get to go home after I have the surgery. I also told my doctor that I absolutely under no circumstanced want DILAUDID after my surgery. They gave that to me after my last surgery and I could not handle it at all. It was WAY too strong! So, I'm hoping that the nurses will respect that.

[dominosarah]

You are in overload right now so you need to take a step back and simplify this a bit.  Never ever underestimate the games our brain can play when dealing with these pills.  Get your friend to hold the pills for you.  We will all probably be faced with this at some point and that is why we have a plan in place just in case.  Dont let yourself suffer thru the pain of surgery.  Healing slows down.  Take the meds if you need them.  Dont worry about the wd's now.   You wont be on them for very long.  Let your doctor know you want the least amount of pills.  You need to get your medical issues taken care of.  Worrying about all the what if's is just going to drive you nuts so try and calm that pretty little head of yours down.  We will be here to see you thru this~

[SJS49]

Thank you you guys for your answer. I'm not really worried about abusing them or anything like that. I'm hoping that I won't really need to take them, I'm just wondering if I do have to take some of them, if I will be put back in withdrawal, even if I take them as prescribed, or less than prescribed and have someone else hold them. I never took them recreationally, but I know my body was dependent on them as evidenced by the withdrawal I had for 5 days. I just really really don't want to go through the withdrawal again. My group that I go to is not NA or AA, in my town it is just a little group of 6 people and we call ourselves "life recovery." We can call each other day or night, but they aren't really "sponsors." This is the first group I've ever been to, so I'm not really sure how the whole sponsor thing works. I have a friend that can hold the pills for me anyway, but as I said, I'm not worried about that aspect...Just wondering if anyone has been off the pills for a while and then had to take them again for a medical emergency, not for fun or just to take them, but like for surgery like me, and whether or not your mind just picks back up on them like you never quit taking them so you withdrawal again or ?? I'm not interested in abusing the pills, I'm not really even interested in taking them or I would have taken the script from the doctor. I wanted to to get rid of this horrendous pain, but I am now terrified of the damn things.  I'm also afraid that I will experience a "high" feeling as a lot of you guys talk about, which is why people like the pills so much I guess. I DO NOT LIKE THE HIGH FEELING and I'm afraid I'll get that also. It makes me very panicky. The reason that I took the Norcos and never wanted to switch to anything else is because it didn't make me feel like that, but if they give me something like Percocet, that makes me feel high and I get panic attacks from it and I can't stand that feeling. I'm afraid that enough time has gone by from quitting them that either they will make me feel like (which I find is far from euphoric!!) or they will give me percocet and I don't want to feel that feeling. I can't stand that I have had this stupid endometriosis for so long, and I can't stand that there is no cure for it and that is has to cause me repeated pain and surgeries and lost time from work. I've already lost two jobs due to being taken off work by the doctors and put on disability and 10 years of being on stupid pain pills because of this. I'm sorry for ranting, but I'm worried about the pill issues and I'm just so fed up with having crappy quality of life and feeling like I'm in labor for two weeks out of the month with chronic fatigue. I was so proud of myself for getting off the pain pills, I thought I would have a better life, but truth be told, I don't. I was told by my doctor last month that this is the semi-equivilant of cancer. Living with this is horrible!!!!

[jifmoc]

In NA there is a pamphlet that deals with taking meds when medically necessary. You may be able to find it online. I'm not sure what recovery you are in, but in AA, NA etc, we discuss that with our sponsors, and typically, the sponsor holds the meds and gives them out when necessary. That way, you're safe from abusing them and retriggering your addiction. I certainly would advise you to not be the one in charge of the script. Sorry, you're going through that. Hope you feel better.

[Tazfixmelord]

If u have to take it. Take the lowest dose possible. And if u don't need it throw them away. Im so sorry u got so far and have to go back to that demon. Stay blessed

[SJS49]

I will definitely take your advice, but I'm worried about if my brain will just pick up pill vibe and I'll get withdrawals again, or worse, I'll feel that "euphoric" high feeling that I HATE!! I don't see how people can like that feeling!