Thinking Sister-in-law Is Addicted.........

[BP0629]

Hi, we recently moved & now live close to my in-laws (yee-ha). I have been on Ambien and Xanax prescriptions for quite sometime but only use as needed. (a 1 month supply of either can last me 3-6 months). My sis-in-law however runs out of Xanax 2 wks after getting script & SOMEHOW has her dr giving her 2 scripts a month for Ambien. 1 she pays for and the other the insurance pays a portion of. Being I don't take it often, I notice if it disappears quicker than it should. Shortly after getting my Ambien filled last month I was short 14 pills in less than 2 weeks & I personally hadn't taken any. My hubby & I sat her up & started counting my pills & charting what was there when I left for work vs. whats there when I return. For instance I left this morning with 36 and returned home to 33....with 2 taken by her on Monday. My hubby is at work & is livid!!!! He wants to rip her a new one when he gets home & I think we should discuss it like adults. I know we can't help her unless she wants to be helped...but she has a problem (and i know i'm leaving out tons of details of her RX addiction & how she dr hops) but I need some advise on how you think we should approach this issue. Hubby gets off work in less than 2 hours and I'm afraid its going to hit the fan when he gets here...any advise....????

[worried878]

yep...to above post...that is all i can say is "YEP"  turns a wonderful person into a total lying manipulating pile of human being if it goes too far....trying to be patient and help..but if they do not want help can be a frustrating and impossible task...i would talk to her like mentioned..like adults,,,feel her out..if she denies and lies,  then u have a tough road..if she breaks down and admits it..asks for help then she is help-able right now...dont know u guys personal situation and how close u r...she does need ur help and support tho if she is willing to accept it..sometimes that is all it takes/someone to care

[neaclow]

WOW..I have to say (pardon my honest here) I've done this before (stolen a pill here and there outta desperation I mean) hahaha...when addicted a person, who is so beautiful in reality...can become downright nasty and do things they wouldn't normally do......

I agree with confrontation..however be suave.  Don't thrust yourself at her face screaming and slashing around as that'll only make her mad, and make her want more.

If she's unresponsive or hostile...leave it be for awhile and try again.  It literally took a YEAR of on and off confrontation (which is to long but I'm abnormally hard headed) for my husband to make an impact on me!!

GOOD LUCK!

[ochooked]

Unless confronted directly with irrefutable evidence she will lie - that is what addicts do.  You are going to have to either hide your pills or better yet, take them with you when you go to work.  Helping her may involve talking to the doctors whose names you find on the prescription bottles you find of hers -  it is called "tough love".  You bet - it is time for some 'adult' conversation but be prepared for a lot of BS --- again, what addicts do best when confronted.  She will most likely turn on the tears, anything she can do to manipulate and continue her drug abuse.  All the best in dealing with this nightmare.

[cattalina]

Absolutely lock your medications up where she can't get to them. You guys can try talking to her, but unless she is willing to admit to a problem she'll likely continue to lie or just 'yes' you to death. You're definitely right, there's no point in yelling at her cuz she won't hear it anyways. You can try and get her to acknowledge a problem thru conversation, but for most of us addicts it takes something big to happen to get us to see it. Good luck!

[scaredmom330]

I agree with you, you all need to sit down and discuss it like adults. But keep in mind, she is addicted to them, she will lie, steal or do whatever it takes to get her hands on them. you need to lock up your medication where she can't get to them, or gve them to hubby and let him be responsible for them. I know this is gonna be real hard for you. but it is for her own good./ she may even get mad and move or not come over anymore, that can be seen as a blessing too. lol take care and keep us posted, good luck



Karen