I was very drawn to your comments this morning. I am struggling here myself by self-medicating on percs. I have been taking anywhere from one half to two a day (10-mgs) for nothing more than to put me in a different "state of mind". This has been going on for two years at least. It used to be good, but no longer-yet, I have to try and talk myself out of taking these every single day. Some times it is only the smallest piece of one I almost feel a war going on between my mind and my spirit. Like Animal House with the devil on one shoulder and the angel on the other saying ...go ahead and do it, then the other says..you don't need this. Ugh-I have been doing some major soul searching and reading this past year of books by Marianne Williamson such as A Return to Love based on a Course in Miracles which is phenominal. Also read Joel Osteen's latest book which gives me a warm feeling all over. I am trying to lean into God for the will and strength to turn my back on this stupid "addiction" or "habit" whatever the heck it is-I am not liking myself one bit these days. Funny thing, while reading the book A New Earth recently, I found myself not even thinking about percs...went for one week without a one. There was something that spoke to me in his writing. I seemed to have a better understanding of the power of the mind over our actions, and how to soften to the Holy Spirit inside me. This may sound very strange to some of you, but I know others will be able to relate-I hope :)
So, the conclusion is...I believe...that we are just a prayer away from getting our lives back.
There was a look of peace and joy in these people's eyes...i also saw that look in this x-junkie's eyes at an NA meeting...young girl..had been thru the mill..saved and so content...i remembered her look as i dont attend that particular meeting anymore...but her eyes stay with me.....and it was that same peace and contentment i saw in these people...i am catholic and do attend church....perhaps i am missing something...or perhaps i just have to find it inside myself
sweetie, you are definately not nuts. I went to church out of a desperation for more meaning to my lfe because I was an alcoholic and had been for many years but headed for suicide because I couln't see any future for me besides drinking and I was sick of it but it was my life and I coudn't stop. When I went to church that day they scared the **** out of me so I left and got drunk but there was something there that i wanted, it was the pure joy these people possessed. So I went back a week or two later and went up for prayer, these two ladies whom I have never seen before started praying a prayer of salvation with me and then one lady asked me if I was an alcoholic!! There was no way she could know that, that's when I knew God was real and He cared for me. They prayed a prayer of deliverance over me and that prayer along with my desire to give it up changed my life forever. I left that church a free woman, I have never felt anything like it.
When I got home I couldn't stand the smell of alcohol, it made me nauseous. My husband couldn't believe it and neither could I but God touched me that day and no matter what anyone says, God really does heal !! Just have a desire to learn and He will teach you. I am so glad no one can take that away from me.That's a true story!
I dont think so either...being catholic, the whole thing was kinda strange to me...but i felt the Presence there...I really did...I may be going kucoo...dont really care but i found it very peaceful and very in touch with my higher power...for me that is God...i know for some it is not....very peaceful
The Lord can do anything, maybe he intervined.
I don' think you are nuts.
I don't think you are nuts!! LOL
If it works, that is great. I hope the pain stays away for you and the cravings too!!