Today I'm clean

[corey411]

Hi Everyone, Wanted to let everyone know that I'm OK. I have been answering a few posts and keeping in touch with a few of you PM and have been lurking and just trying to focus on my recovery. I'm somewhere in week 4 and have been going to NA everyday except once. The meetings really help but some of the members are very hardcore. Kinda like NA should have a ZI added to it. But I've been honest, willing and open-minded(an NA thing). It's really hard stuff. I have been finding out alot about myself and things that I need to work on.

Funny thing, I don't really stress about length of cleantime anymore. It was always so hard going back to day 1. I would be near 4 months if not for a week long relapse. Thing is that I had 4 months before, and 3 months twice and 2 months a few times before that. The thing that I realize that is different now is that even when I have a year, if I take 365 days and analyze everyone of them the most important day that I will ever have clean is TODAY. Sometimes it will be a good easy day and sometimes it will feel like I have a month again. My process right now is just trying to sort out how to better manage my life so that I can cope with those not so good days. My thoughts and prayers have remained with all of you fighting this battle. GBU, Corey

[aloneandempty185]

Glad to hear the good news. Keep up the fight!

[worried878]

Glad u r hanging in there!

[corey411]

So good to hear from all of you. Thank you for your support. I'm doing OK. Actualy have real good moments but the anxiety is rougher this time than ever before. I have been taking Clonopin for a couple years for panic attacks...only a small amount and actually not everyday...only when I have a panic attack and sometimes to help sleep. I'm starting on Celexa with the goal of...hopefully stopping the Clonopin once the Celexa kicks in and hopefully controls my anxiety. I think the Clonopin is messing with my sleep. This is probably why the anxiety is worse so I'm telling myself just to bite the bullet...anything is better than how I felt 3 1/2 weeks ago. NA meetings really help. I just got back from one and everytime I go I just walk out feeling grounded. There's so many of us out there.I've been keeping tabs on the forum and know alot of you have also been struggling. Lady, Gizzy and Sad, You guys have been in my prayers. Keep pushing forward. Make recovery a one way street. God Bless All, Corey

[avisg]

Corey,
I Am glad to see you.I am glad you are back on track .What did you decided to do about aftercare?

[monkeyonmyback68]

You sound so good and I am so Proud of you =) Great Job and I hope the NA meetings keep going good for you . I am so Happy for you :)

[gizzy32]

sounds like your working hard at this, your doing great. glad that you are attending N/A, it's a great support group.

[lostdreams]

Keep up the good work Corey, Your doing and excellent job. GBU

[Decisions]

Corey , you sound good and at peace.
Glad for you,.. stay stong.
!d

[sadinmichigan]

I am so glad that your doing good..and you are so right..today is the only day that matters..it's so good to see you around still..you are a wonderful insightful person..thanks for posting..Love Lisa

[worried878]

NA can be hard core...after going there i was shocked at some of the stories...so sad...but did make me realize where this can all lead...AA is a bit lighter and our AA groups are a mixture of pill heads and alkies...so we blend...all really the same in the addiction arena...

[newmanagment]

corey, ya know ya my shawtie!!! i got mad love for ya, and you makin the meetings has made me a proud man! keep at it, an you are sooo right, TODAY is the day that matters!!! much love hon....

[ladyboop]

So good to see you post. I am so happy for you girl... Keep up the good work. We all know that it can be very hard work.. As you know, I have had a hard time as well. been on the Sub 5 days now.. Don't like it at all. Looking forward to getting off of it myself. I also am going to go to meetings. I think it will be a big help in stay clean.. I am so proud of you.. Thanks for posting. I have thought about you, Just been to sick to ask about you..lol..lol...


   Lady

[joann1975]

Congrats! It is great to hear from you....I am glad NA is working out so well for you. I am proud of you!
Love ya,
JoAnn