Vicodin Abuse Depression

[mymaui]

I have been addicted to Vicodin for several years. I take about 30 a day and cannot function normally without them. When I am out I have severe depression and very serious thoughts of suicide just to end the suffering. I don't wish to discuss this with my HMO doctor as I feel he is not competent to handle it. In patient treatment may jeopardize my job. Is there some type of out patient treatment I can seek that can help me wean off this terrible state I have gotten myself into? I am suffering and need assistance ASAP. Thanks

[mymaui]

I'm rock bottom. None left- day 2. Don't know what to do. I just want to go to sleep forever...

[IBKleen]

You are NOT a failure. You just need some support and direction. If you don't have that at home, then use what you can here.

So, where are you now? How many left, etc.....

[mymaui]

Thanks for the response. My family is aware but are the type of folks that do not like to talk/get involved with the negatives of life (if you ignore it it might just go away on it's own...). My father takes Vicodin for pain and I have helped myself to his medication for years. He knows and has suggested I get help and left it at that. My Husband is useless. I do not want to burden my children with this so I have tried to keep them out of it as much as possible. I have lost my source and have no idea how to taper off without access to the drug. I feel like a failure and I am embarrassed discussing this. Not sure what my options are at this point...

[allaboutmary]

You are not alone. This forum is a great place to start. You can detox at home. It will be horrible, no way around that. Unless you try to taper, allthough I was not successful at tapering, some people are. Depression is a normal side effect of withdrawal.  Can you take some time off work to detox?  Keep reading and posting on this forum. There are so many wonderful people here that will try to help you.  Tell us more about your situation. Do you have any support system (wife, husband, family)?  

[Summer123]

I think there is outpatient treatment for detox.  If you can taper, it may help.  I would see a doctor about the depression.  You may need an antidpressant for a  little while.  Cold turkey gets the withdrawal symptoms over with quicker, but I don't know about on your high a dosage.  Stick around as there will be others to help you.

[IBKleen]

Hello and Welcome!

You can do a google search, or check your local phone book for outpatient facilities in your area. Is that what you mean?

Or, you can taper at home with a schedule.

If you don't trust talking with your doctor, you may want to find a new one. If you don't get honest with your current doctor, he will always be available to get more scripts. that is why it is recommended that you tell him/her.

Take care and good luck.