hello friends. i am back yet again

[kme17]

I am completely losing my battle? I am going to pick myself back up and give this another go. Will you help me ... Again?

[buddycrunch]

Forgot to mention, i went to a psychologist on 2nd week, he scribed gabapentin for pain and cravings.

[buddycrunch]

Glad to hear you are feling ok at this time, the next few days will probably be rough.  Gather your comfort things.

Get something for the stomach and diarrea, plenty of very soft tp
expect the sweats and chills, so towels and warm soft clothing
bannanas
Lots of fluids, many on here reccomend 'ensure'
some mindless humor stuff to watch, keep yourself distracted with not to stressful stuff
sleep aids like, meletonin, diphenhydramine, 5htp
several members here reccomend suppliments or 'thomas recipe'

Ask away, everybody wants this yo work as comfortable as can be for you.  

PS:  Good job on day two!

[selfinduced]

Hang in there ok? Day 3 is a biggie. Get thru tomorrow and your well on your way. Keep posting symptoms, fears, joy, hurdles. We will lift you. Now is your time to dig deep and make it happen. Support is on the way...

[kme17]

I and on day 2. Feeling ok. Vote tons of things to help ease symptom. Prayed to family above and I feel like all is working. I am doing ok at this min. I will pray its stays this good! Thanks everyone. I am sure I will be posting a ton very soon.

[Fireby29]

Hi kme, welcome back and congrats on giving it a go again.  Never give up.  I do have a question for you, and it was very important for my getting clean:

What are you doing different this time?

For me, I was relapse central until I realized the basics you have heard before I am sure.  Tell your secret, cut ALL sources of narcs, and get aftercare.  First I did none of it, then I did some, and finally, 120 plus days ago, I did all of it.  Just a thought.

Bryan

[buddycrunch]

Fighting addiction and pain, Sometimes I feel like we (us on this website) are in a little life raft out in the middle of an ocean full of sharks.  Some of us have been out there for a long time and getting hungry.   Just got to hang on when the waves get rough so you don't fall out of the boat.

[buddycrunch]

Welcome back.   Please join our circle. We are happy and willing to listen and share our thoughts with you. There are so many features of this website, be consummed by it, it really helps.

Many times per day, I share my various moods on here.

[Pat1956100]

Hi kme and welcome back.
I recently returned myself.
Buddy is just kidding and you will get to know him and love him lol.

Make sure you are eating as healthy as you can and taking good care of yourself.  Don't forget the imodium.

I am sure we will chat over the next few days at least.

Pat

[kme17]

However I am trying to keep a positive mind. I remember I was RX opana a couple yrs ago and I would eat all 60 in 3 days sometime. I would be vicious, ants, depressed, .. basically all the withdrawl symptoms. But I didn't know I was going thru wd. So since I know it is just that now I have made it worse then what it was before I knew. I m about 13 hrs in. So I don't feel horrible yet. I am hoping that since I have to put of a front this time I can fake it until I make it. Thanks everyone who is posting for me. Old and new! I'm sure tomorrow I will be here more and day 3 even more. Day 3 and 4 I expect to want to cave bad. You all have helped me they that point more then once. I know u will all help me again! And for this I love u guys!

[Undertow71]

Yes for me the depression gets worse each time,letting myself down and my loved ones.they just can't comprehend.only another addict truely understands.
      But to be honest i don't really care,if someone asks i tell the truth,if they cannot handle it or accept ? no skin off my back,they do not walk my path.
   I used to have low self asteem,and what others thought of me would crush my world.It took years to change that.And you know what i found? The family that means most to me are the ones that forgive me and have patience for me,because they know ho i am as a person and i am .wonderful,helpfull.caring.and understanding,giving and forgiving,But at the same time i only help those thaty help themselves and do not tolerate people judging me or treating me less than i treat them.
and for the most part i get that in return making it much easier to handle it when i have a slip.
    But my main support lately has come from right here.

[Sonrissa]

Our minds always make things worse than they actually are! Try hard not to worry or anticipate what may or may not happen! Just relax and take this as it comes! You can do this! We will support you through every step! Take care!

[gnarly_1]

HI try not to let fear into the equation it is always worst in our heads then it turns out to be also dont read anything into it take it one day at a time it will be what it will be not much you can do but keep a postive attitude about yourself that will help more then you know keep posting for support we all want to see you get well.........Gnarly

[kme17]

Yes stay busy! I know that's where I get cought up. The depression is a dousy and I just lay around. Figure out how to get out of work etc. I am so mad at myself cause I was thru the worst and had the easiest withdrawl I ever did. This time I know will prob be the worse. Since this monster addiction has gotten worse. I m off 5 days. Then back to work for 2 .. that's so I don't get bored after feeling like its about time to get up n moving. Then off for 4 more days. So I can rest up a bit. I am sooooo scared this time. More then usual. My husband don't know this time n I'm afraid to tell him even tho I know he won't leave me or ne thing crazy but he was look at me w that disappointed and distrusting look n I just can't take that right now

[Sonrissa]

Of course!

I'm so sorry, kme that you are back under these circumstances! I'm glad that you haven't given up! You can never lose if you don't stop trying!

[Undertow71]

Arn't rollercaster rides fun?Of course i never see anyone turned away here so i believe you are safe coming back,U need anything just hollar.
  That's why we are here.
I slipped and fell also.And after this time i will keep checking in regular to keep perspective on things.And have a better chance.
   But the reason i stopped coming after my last feel good med free moment is that i got a job,was doing side jobs and much more ,keeping myself way busy.The addictive mind is very crafty and can rationalize almost anything.
   I forgot to take a lil time each day to stay connected and it hurt me.
So just keep soming back.
   You can do this!!

[akitagurl12]

:) YOU CAN DO THIS!  
A random quote that helped me get started again (after tons of relapses) was this one...

"Don't be discouraged. It's often the last key in the bunch that opens the lock. "

Welcome Back!

[overeasy]

you bet.

[smiles4eva]

Always!