Wow Heather, I was just reading thru this whole post & it amazes me!!!....you my girl have come soooooo far!!...this gives me real hope!!!....so HAPPY for u Hun!!! XXOO
Yep wow !!! You have come a long way ;))
WOW, just reading my first post...
Reminds me of a PLACE I never want to go again...Reminds me I am LOVED...and honestly I am GLAD I decided to post!! THANK YOU ALL for everything every kind word, I will NEVER forget this!!
LOVE YOU ALL
thank u everyone again it means so much 2 know ppl care i have an apt w the pcp mon @ 1045 n i have been w my best friend whose sober today n her hubby n baby so i could forget things n not dwell sorry i disappeared i had 2 go
thankyou everyone, im eating a lil better i picked up bananas, i swear the neighbors must think i dont know the difference between a gun n fire works!!, my dogs r freaking!! sorry, i couldnt find potassium i am taking multi vitamins i cant take time off just yet the schedule is made months in advance i am off mon-wed so just the weekend i wrk 3-4days a week 12 hrs a day.. my ac is out n its sooo hot in here!!!
Debbie is right! We are so much stronger than we know! I know you want this so badly. And, all I can tell you is that you'll feel so much better about yourself if you push through this! Don't worry about tomorrow or the 'unknown'. Just stay in the moment. Just make it through this single moment & the next. Baby steps when you feel like this. Breathe.
By the way, you're not a 'failure'. Far From it! You've got a lot of grit! Please, don't beat yourself up. That's part of the problem for a lot of us. Instead, try to list your positive qualities & think of the good things you've done in the past & what you might be able to do in the future as the clean 'new you'. Keep your eye on the prize, my friend! HOLD FAST!
HI again the crap your going threw is causeing your wds to be worse, try to find a safe place to go if you can, you cant sit around and worry makes it a hell of it worse, the methadone you have left I would split them up and ween off the rest, then your wds should get better, and find a safe place to be, john
Heather there is healing and hope Hun. Don't lose your hope. There is always hope. Can you go see your pasto? Are you keeping hydrated?
Are you eating? Drink Gatorade, ensure.
Our bodies can handle more than we think we can.
Keep moving forward. Don't give up.
All the emotions are normal with detox. All the suppressed emotions come flooding in. Pray, pray,pray....
Breathe , deep breathes, just to relax.
You are going to be fine. Did you try to set up any counseling yet?
GOD loves you and so do we. Did you call and talk to your friend?
We are here Hun. Keep posting, don't isolate.
Hugs and many prayers
Debbie
It sounds like you're being hit with this all at once. I feel for you. I've been having similar experiences (massive crap-storms hitting me one right after another.) YOU ARE NOT ALONE, HEATHER. Is there anyone clean around you that you can reach out to for help?
Have you been taking lots of hot, salt baths & taking Cal/mag/potassium for the RLS? My hat is so off to you for working through this. Is there any way you could take a little time off?
lack of sleep rls depression regret no motivation my job everything that has happened the past 90 days, being shot at, losing my fiance after 10 years im a train wreck but my parents r w God iv failed my whole life i want this so bad but i cant take this at the same time...
Hey Heather, I just read your status. How're you holding up? What's going on?
Whether you know it or not you've been doing TREMENDOUSLY. Keep moving forward. You don't want to have to go through this all over again! We're here..
Sorry been trying 2 keep busy, 2 nights in a row NO SLEEP RLS is driving me wild even with baths and showers!! My 4th was fun last night NOT so much!! I dont know how much longer I can do this!! I have to work this weekend I am an emotional train wreck! I dont know what to do I took 3 melatonin Robaxin (I know bad idea) tylonal and aleve all at diff times trying 2 relax and NOTHING!!! How long do I have to suffer!!! I hope i can hold on....sorry 4 the spelling
Heather??? Please check in Hun. How are you doing?
Sending hope, prayers. Encouragment,
Hugs
Debbie
Absolutely, 100% True. Detox is not for the meek. And you need unlimited sources of positive friends and family, and you will HAVE to get out of that neighborhood. No other way. If you don't take all of the advice, you won't detox.
I hope you don't think I'm being a *****...I'm trying being straight with you about this Methadone detox. If you are still taking Methadone, then the REAL withdrawal hasn't even started. After your completely LAST dose of Methadone, wait about one week. Then the true withdrawal symptoms will show their true colors. Drink the regular Ensure. Great advice. The other types are for gaining weight and/or muscle. And it doesn't matter if you're on 5 mg or 100 mg. It's going to be unpleasant. That's why you have to either do it all the way, or, if you are a true addict (like me) you will probably use when the going gets tough. I just hate that the clinics allow pill poppers to get on Methadone, which I've stated to them. They justify it by saying....'if it will prevent them from getting arrested, then that's why we allow it.' Can you run away to the mountains or a deserted island for 3 months?
Good Luck Heather. I'm just speaking from my own experiences. And there's nothing better than an opiate high. Had to say goodbye, but I think about her (opiate) every single day, even after years.
sorry you aren't feeling that great today. keep moving forward.
tomorrow will be a better day by faith.
are you staying hydrated and eating healthy foods? fruit that's great, did you eat some?
that's awesome that you slept, you will make some people envious.
praying for your healing,
Debbie
Today I was okay Went to bed at 12am and slept till 7 Which shocked me Then I took my zoloft and went back to bed till 11ish. I let the dogs out (5 pits) went grocery shopping and only bought fruit mayo and ketchup (SMH) I guess its bad to shop when ur nauseated!! Then back home and I passed out for another 2-3hrs!! I am so cold!! I am shaking all the time but in the evening I do get an appetite THANK GOD! I know I'm big but I have lost WAYYY to much weight to quickly!! Thanks for checking on me.. I've been depressed today!!
Heather we can't save people From themselves. He needs to take care of himself and do what he needs to do to receive help and healing. You need to focus on your recovery and your healing.
I am sorry you don't have your parents at such a young age. That's great you have some good friends . Your pastor will be a great help to you. So glad you attend, staying active there and clinging to the LORD will help you.
How are you feeling today?
Continued prayers and support,
Keep up the good work,
debbie
thats a withdrawl sign...it will b ok
I go to church and am joining small groups, My parents are both with God, but I have my best friend and her mom n husband. My pastor is a recovering addict hes so inspiring!! I am 95% moved in and yes he has tried to contact me from jail but cell phones can not take collect calls. I know i need 2 get away, but part of me feels so bad for him his child hood and his past caused him to be who he is now and his WHOLE world has given up on him, i didnt want to give up either, My friend at church said give it space and time and pray on it!! I am glad to hear that this is normal, Its shocking that it came on day 5/6 instead of later, esp as long as I have been using.. Now if it just goes ALL the way away!!!
yes it tends to come in waves, that is great you are at this point. the better waves will start to outweigh the bad ones.
do you have any aftercare set up? counseling, support groups, church, exercise to help prevent relapse? do you have a pastor you can counsel with?
fruits, veggies, proteins. drinking boost, ensure, protein shakes, multi vitamin all these will help rebuild your body. the exercise will help get your natural endrophins repopulating again.
have you moved your things into a new house?
has your old bf tried to contact you? it would be best to change your phone number.
GOD bless
Thats what happened yesterday I was like I am so done! Then this morning at 130ish i was back to being sick, now I feel fine...ish
Debbie,
Thank you it means a lot. Is it common for the symptoms to vanish almost completely by mid-late afternoon and reaapear in the morning?
Heather you are doing great. Drink Lots of fluids, healthy ones. Healthy foods, take an antihistamine. Keep on keepin on.
Sending Prayers,
Debbie