You are a recovering addict from crack and nerve pills.... you know what you need to do.
It's a matter of taking the step, and stopping. It sounds like you have the desire to quit, but you're scared of the pain. A lot of us have been there, and I can tell you from personal experience, 90% of it is in your head.
Once you get yourself clean, you'll see what I'm talking about.
You know what needs to be done. Are you willing to do it?
you just have to quit! You already know about the battle being that you have quit other things-However, I see that you are bouncing around on drugs but the thing is you are still doing a drug of some sort-you just have to put them all down. We all have to do it someday one way or another! I figured that out while satting in jail charged with 3 felonies--I thought to mysel " This was the end result the whole time, I just didnt have to pick to do it in here, but either way w/ds were the end result" and just the thought of " I could have donr this in the confort of my own home" In the end we drug usage ends for us all just dont let it be your end