Why Do We Take Them?

[steveQTtime]

I was just wondering how we all got started..

I went to the doctor after a off raod accident.
found out that I have had a bad dics L4/L5 for a long time.
started out with the norm 4 to 6 a day! that was my prescription wow, and 4 somas a day. wow.

My DR said on Fri. that if you are in servere PAIN it is tough to be an addict.. you are using for the pain....
I only had slight pain and was still using.. I still have pain that is my problem!!

IS THEIR A DIFF. BETWEEN   DEPENDENCY AND PHYSICAL ADDICTION??

GOOD LUCK TODAY

ST

[chemmonster7]

I think alot of take them at first because we trust our docs I know alot of others started other ways but docs are guilty they get you hook and then cut you off I started with just 1 script by the end I left w/12 they just keep adding stuff I also think addiction depends on your personality I do believe ther are those that can control it i am not one of them wish I was!

[The Hobbit]

Grandma never found out. Grandma is too high to care anyway :)
My grandma has been on 4 a day for about 5 years. She's really old now and she would give them to me if I asked. She's like that. She gave me a few once because I had a headache! imagine how happy I was. Vicodin is the only thing that keeps her happy these days since she's pretty immobilized. She went without for a week last week and went through no withdrawal.

[gipsee]

Like you.... nothing "felt" anything to me for a very long time.   I was emotionless.  

Things are getting better.

[CRIMINAL]

at age 13 i expirimented with weed,acid n mushroms then after a few years i did exstasy and crack n got a habbit..then found oxycontin and eventualy was snorting over 300mgs a day (i think i was self medicating cuz of my bipolar). then one day my best friend had herion and i let him shoot me up (cuz i didnt know how) and after that i stoppd the oxycontin cuz i was INSTANTLY hooked to the syringe AND the heroin..now its 9years later and im on a methodone clinic i was on 120mg a day but am down to 70mg now

[bugsy89734]

keep up the good work crim!!!!stay strong and gradually,,well maybe pill free some day,,bugzz

[gipsee]

I started w/these 5 years ago.  Did two a day never ran out early, never craved more.   Then I had three surgeires 3 years in a row.  The last one was a doozie... so there I began to do more but was Rx'd more.

I never Dr. Shopped, or ran out.. just kept taking them continually as prescribed.

Last six months or so started w/anxiety.  Wham... was Rx Xanax, that worked out ok for a bit...then just started feeling crappy all the time.  Dr. Gave me Lexapro... that was horrible.  So I started doing some soul searching, noticing the behavior of others around me who are Rx'd the script for Vics or Oxys ... running out, etc., made up my mind to quit.

I wanted out...

[matine]

Yes. I was getting a buzz for a long time, then one day it did not matter how many I took, nothing. But I had to keep taking them otherwise...w/d. A vicious cycle.

[blb6263]

Vicious, indeed.  The buzz was gone, but I sensed what was going to happen if I quit taking them altogether.  So I carried on.  Until last week.

I feel more...  what... ummmm...  crisp.  Things feel "real".  Frankly, I hadn't noticed that they weren't feeling "real" until after the fog lifted.

Good luck to you, too!

[blb6263]

Well, I quit drinking.  About a year and a half later, my daughter got her tonsils out and they gave her a prescription for liquid lortab for the pain.  Due to an honest mistake, it was refilled twice!  She wasn't in much pain and hated the way it made her feel, so two bottles of liquid lortab sat in my fridge for months.  Finally, one night, I drank some of it, just to see what it felt like - hoping for a buzz (wihtout alcohol).  That was it.  I loved the high.  I felt very energetic and happy.  I drank both bottles within a few weeks.  I dabbled around with tussionex, vicodin, etc. till I found 10 mg Lortab and a regular (illegal) supply.  That was a long time ago.  Now I've been spending money I don't have to get more and more pills, which haven't made me feel euphoric in a long time.

[DanielleLeigh]

Did your grandmother ever find out that you were stealing her pills? Just curious. lol

-Danielle

[fishmeal]

That's how I'm feeling a little... unfogged, (day 3 without), but geeze I am thinking about that script that is waiting for me... just 1 little pill and everything would be OK.

[blb6263]

I didn't notice that I wasn't feeling until I started feeling again.  Yeah, I'm thinking about the pills too.  But there toward the end I couldn't find the amount to take to make me feel "right".  I would get a headache, take more.  I haven't felt the really great feeling from them in a long time.  I couldn't adjust to even feel right.  I can't explain it.  I took what I'm sure was too much for me a couple of times just trying to get feeling decnt, but it wasn't happening.  So I'm trying to remember that to keep me focused on the quitting for now.  

[CRIMINAL]

you NEVER get that 1st high again no matter how much you take but that dont stop us from trying and thinking "if i just take enough il get that high again" but nothing could be further from the truth. many times iv gone as far as spending 100.00 or more on heroin just to get ONE high (i know thats stupid..and im not proud of it) but even spending all that money i still didnt get that high like i did when i first started using..its just a waste of money..im just glad iv got 6 days clean now n gona save $$$

[mema3]

Hey - there was someone on here who laid out Dependancy vs addiction quite succintly -

You are dependent if you are taking them for legit reasons - and don't feel the need to abuse them.  You are an addict if you will lie, cheat, steal,doctor shop - do whatever it takes to get your hands on them. You are addicted if a month supply is gone in a week.  Or two.

Now maybe it is the guilt or the stigma that comes with "pain meds", but I really couldn't understand the difference.  I know that happened b/c of my last doctor experience who is just anti pain med.  Did I get to the point of abuse - Darn close - as I would feel panic if I came to the point of where there were too few pills left in my bottle.  I would say that my tolerence for the meds grew - and my doc prescribed more.  I don't like that!  Does that make me an addict - by definition no - but in my mind - I believe I am.

I don't know if this helps - but when I read this definition from an earlier post - it made sense.  I just have to get over the catholic guilt that just seems to compound the crappy feeling I get over all of this!

[matine]

Yes there is a diff. If you can hold  the line and consume just for pain, then you are dependent on them. Other-hand, u b tak'n dem fur ze buzz, z are hooked.

[The Hobbit]

I'm 26, and about 3 years ago I heard about this stuff in college. I had moved from England in 2001, and vicodin is unheard of over there. We can't get hold of it because it's not prescribed (I could be wrong).

Anyway, after hearing about it and then seeing a vial of my grandmas pills, I decided to try one. Nothing happened. I tried this a few times and nothing happened. I thought that they were pretty **** really. Then one day I just decided to take two and WOW! It felt like the sun was shining in my soul. I was instantly hooked. So every Tuesday for French class I would get 4 pills, two for me and two for my friend, and we would get high once a week. Once a week became the weekends too, and suddenly, two pills didn't do it for me anymore and I cut my friend out of the deal because it meant more for me!! (Typically selfish drug addict eh!!) This became 3 a day and before you knew it, I was craving them daily. So, unlike most people, mine was not a prescribed addiction. Curiosity and collegiate temptation aided my discovery of the M357.