bah

[toejam_muncher]

i used to write a lot. i used to have a lot to write about. not that i was ever really good at it...but it seems like the rare occasions i write now, it's usually about my addiction. i really feel like my mind is turning to mush sometimes. i can't seem to find a way convince myself to quit. it seems like such a great idea and i know i NEED to...but when the urge comes it seems like it completely consumes me. what do you do when you're tired of being addicted? i've quit in the past. the worst thing is that i know when i quit again the urge will never really go away. this time it may be worse since i'm older. anyway...i guess i'm just rambling because i have no where else to vent these sorts of thoughts.

[windowsca]

Hi again!  Glad to see a post from you finally.  Was today a little better?

[toejam_muncher]

you know when i quit smoking...they had nicorette gum. at least when i chewed that,  i could trick myself into thinking it took most of the urge away. thanks for your responses. i really hope that one day i'll be able to stop. it's the thought that i gave this up for nearly 10 years and the addiction never really went away. i guess it's good though. next time i'll know that there isn't a "just this once"

anyway...sometimes it really does feel as though parts of me keep falling off because of my addiction. i suppose it's good that i've become aware of it...but it doesn't make things any easier. this forum helps because there are people here who do get sober and stay that way. i admire those people. that's why i come here. it helps to know someone's done it so obviously it isn't going to be the end of the world.

[peaceinknowing]

No matter how down and out you feel throughout your road to recovery, you will always find a sense of peace when you're able to sit down and post something here on the forums. I know it seems like there's nowhere to turn through all of this, so I'm glad you're able to at least post here and let us know what your thoughts are. Things are tough, especially when you're battling an addiction that doesn't seem to wanna let go of all of us. It can be done, and we can do this.

[windowsca]

Here T, try thinking about this instead ~

Consult not your fears but your hopes and your dreams. Think not about your frustrations, but about your unfulfilled potential. Concern yourself not with what you tried and failed in, but with what it is still possible for you to do. - Pope John XXIII

Sweetie, you haven't tried the right thing yet, but it's out there.  So many people get through this, simply by giving it one more try.  I bet I have some ideas you haven't tried yet.  Let's just see, one more time, O.K.?

[windowsca]

Hi there, you sound like you are not doing well at all.  I think we need to talk through this a bit.  What are you doing, how much have you taken?