I was looking for some answers to "saving" my own family and I just need to ask you why don't you leave? I have been dealing with this for two years and I am depressed and can barely function in day to day life. I'm not the addict he is. I don't have to stay and hurt myself and my children. So why do we stay?
Missy & Alyssa
Please go to a Alon meeting, you don't have to say anything, nor pay anything, just sit and listen if you choose, you both might find some answers there,.......Alyssa was right, it is not your problems, but to learn how to deal with them if you choose to stay or leave ( your hubbies), I will gurantee these meeetings will help you, that is what they were base upon, finding ways to "help" ourselfs first, and then facing the reality of our journey in life has taken us, with the substance, and if anything, if you don't make a good choice now, how will you teach your children too?.....<please don't take that as being nasty, I have walked in the same shoes you have>
May happiness and peace of mind find you,
I am 39 I have a drug problem I have been fighting this war for too long . I
KEEP FIGHTING THE FIGHT YOU WILL WIN.
My husband has been smoking crack for about 7 years. We have been together for about 2 years. We have been fighting his addiction daily. He has never stayed off of the crack. He is in trouble with the law for bad checks. He has really been making an effort to stay clean. He has gone 10 days without smoking. He says he does not even crave it anymore and I have nothing to worry about that he is through with it. After smoking for so many years is it possible for someone just to stop like this or is he just fooling me and himself?
hello I need help too my husband has plenty of money so he's crack usage has never hit rock bottom he thinks he is a great husband because he pays all the bills and keeps food in the house i never want for anything except my "Husband" the one who promise to love and respect me!!!!! evertime he uses he has an excuse I'm always mad or I gave up on him when reality is he gave up on us and he's self I knew my husband had a problem with crack before i married him but he was clean then & together we was going to fight this addiction. But it has not worked out that way about a year after we was married he started again not everyday not even every week but when he did it was hundred of dollers even thousands and for hours he doesn't come home even all nite sometimes but to him it is "NO BIG DEAL" I'm sittting home going crazy thinking all the worst things and he comes home like he's been at work for 8 hrs i should be happy to see him and in a strange way i am because i know he's not dead somewhere but i have let my anger go so many times and for maybe a month or so he's clean being the best husband I'm really confused because I know leaving him is the right thing to do but when you marry it is for better and worse and doesn't that mean fighting with everthing you got to keep your vows when is it ever time to give up on your marriage?
Let me just start off with saying that i do smoke crack, im 19 years old and have been smoking for 2 years off and on. Me being in denile and obviosly being 19 years old, i dont have the money to support a 100 dollars of crack everynight. But what i do know is that even though people stop smoking crack left and right, there needs to be a reason for them to do that. I always seem to start smoking again when i feel lonely and deppressed, but every time i have stopped was because i had someone there to tell me the consequenses of my actions. The best thing that i can tell you Tammy, is that if your husband has not stopped for you, is either because you have not told him what could happen with your relationship or that he wont quiot untill you do leave him and he notices when he hits rock bottom what hes lossed. You may think that i dont know what i am talking about because of my age, bust trust me, its best for your relationship to set boundries and leave him. Either way its the best for both of you.
I know you probably did not realize this at the time but you posted a reply to a message from 2000, seven years ago. This has been a problem since our forum made some changes last week and many people have been doing the same thing. Please keep around though and check our active posts. Go to the top of page and click on forum and then click again on the Addiction forum in second paragraph.
Hello and welcome to the forum....
You mentioned you used N/A and Narconon........then you mention he really craves crack when he has been drinking...........
An addict has to obstain from all drugs and alcohol is a drug........what did you do at N/A and Narconon did you bother to even listen........
he needs 90 meetings in 90 days........talk to a drug counselor even inpatient drug rehab.........
Addiction is one of the worst diseases in our world today........and until people start treating it like a disease addiction will thrive for many years to come.......
I am 34 yrs old. I never seen Crack till last year when I met my boyfriend. It has completly ruined my life. I have been smoking for over 1 yr now... I have gone so far in debt & lost so much. He has been smoking 4 yrs & is the greatest person when not on it but he won't quit. I say every day that I am not doing it anymore.. I am so tired of making someone else money & I never have none... then he will take us right to it & once he lights up & give in... how can I stop this madness?? I am fine as long as I am not around it.... is there any help to this or is the only way to leave him????
From my experience with a crack head, I lived with one for 11 years, stole everything but the kitchen sink, i am sure there are people out there who can stop BUT they have to want it, from my experience crack heads will take you down with them everytime if you let them what i done after 11 years was tired of seeing my kids hurt and i kick is *** to the curb, he cried and pleaded with me "i dont have no place to live" well thats not my problem, what was my problem was my kids and not seeing them hurt no more, he chose to let his self get like this so he can live like this, we spent 1000.00 of on rehab 4 times aa, na ,ca, nothing why becuase he didnt want to quit he enjoyed the life of feeling 10ft tall and bullet proof. so fine you want that life live it by your self buddy well guess what happens, crack got control of him once again and now he has a perament place to live, where ya ask in the prison systems, he let it control him and now is doing time for 2 counts of arm robbery and theift over 10,000 so i hope he can be straighting up when he gt out in bout 20 years. all i can say is let him/her go.
Run away. Don't walk, run (fast).
If you think it's bad now, stick around someone who's still using and you'll be seeing worse. It will get worse. It ALWAYS gets worse.
Most folks in Recovery will tell you that they had to completely avoid all People, Places and Things associated with using. Completely. All of 'em.
Grab hold of the moment of clarity that allowed you to see this for the madness that it is. Get away from it now. Those moments of clarity often don't last too long - it's more than just a possibility that next week (or tomorrow) you be thinking "Why did I think this was madness? This isn't so bad" and it will just keep getting worse and worse and worse . . . and you'll care less and less and less . . .
Get away and get clean while you have a chance. You're running out of time.