i don't use, my boyfriends on methadone anyone is my sitution?

[jude1970]

I don't use drugs at all , my boyfriend has been on methadone for 11yrs , and has taken other drugs on top .
we have 5 children, i love him , but i find it hard to understand him ,due to that fact , that i don't do any drugs at all.
he has tried twice to come off methadone and failed, he is now on his third time , i hope he will be able to do it this time.my 3 older children know but dont really understand , There father  nuts out sometimes and is very abusive to
all of us especially me.very mailce and cruel, he get paranoid about anything.i live a double life ,my familyand friends dont know ,and i have noone to talk to about this

[emwave]

Thanks for sending the extra information.  90mgs is a fairly high dose, but some people take twice that amount.  Everyone is different, but your boyfriend may just be tapering to quickly.  If he isn't feeling well (as in having wd syptoms), talk to him about not dropping this Wednesday.  2.5mg every week is the same as 5mg every two weeks.  Some people seem to need 2 weeks between 10% drops (and he's exceeding the 10% now that he is below 50mg).  Does he usually "act up" 2-3 days after his dose drops?  Usually people don't notice much difference the first day.  
It seems that there are a number of people who start to feel the tapering effect once they get below 60mg.  Others don't run into any problems until about 30mgs.  I didn't notice any difference until about 20mg.  But as a rule, it seems that 60mg and 30mg are "tough spots".  See if he can stay put on the dose he's at until he feels well.  If there's no pattern to his behavior, he may be supplementing his methadone with other opiates when he can get them.  That would REALLY screw up his taper.
But let's assume for now that his taper is just too fast.  Keeping him at his current dose until his body adjusts would be his best bet.  I know he wants to get off, but methadone isn't something you can taper quickly off of.  Please check the health pages for the amino acid protocol -- he may benefit from starting to use low doses of some of the supplements.  11 years is a long time to be on methadone (or any opiate), but people have been on it much longer and at much higher doses and have made it so your boyfriend can do this -- he may just need to slow down.
Is the diazepam prescribed by a doctor (I hope)?  40mgs per day is a high dose -- people are rarely prescribed more than that.  Try to find out if he's taking anything else.
People are here to help you -- please keep in touch.

[Lisa034]

Slow down is he ok with 2.5mg drop every single week?  Sounds to me like he needs to slow down.  Belive me I know what is like to want to get off the methadone.  NOBODY knows better then me.  I have been comming down off methadone at a pretty fast rate. However that is NOT for everyone. Some people have to stay at one dose for six weeks befor they are able to go down again. If he is still using other drugs, no let me restate that if he is still abusing other drugs then in my opinion he is not ready to come off the methadone. What will he do once he comes off the done?  The cravings do not just go away.  He will need some aftercare. NA or some sort of counseling.  Just my advice
Thinking of you and your family
Lisa034
Jacksonville,FL

[jude1970]

he on  was on 90 mgs now down to 42.5mgs  come down every wednesday 2.5 mgs plus
he on diazapam  10mgs  4 times a day, and i dont know if anything else he on

[emwave]

Methadone is very hard to come off of -- especially if he's been on it for 11 years.  Do you know how high of a dose he was on?  If he's trying to quit, he's tapering the dose -- which can be really hard for some people.  But once the dose gets low enough, other opiates WILL get him high.  That may be what you are seeing?  Perhaps the clinic he's at is tapering him, but once he started feeling uncomfortable he may have started taking some other opiates -- and methadone doesn't block the feeling from other opiates at lower doses.  
You need to talk to him and ask him what's going on.  He may just need to slow his taper of the methadone.  Try to get him to realize that all of those years on methadone and all of the tapering is a waste if he gets himself hooked on something else now.  Get more information and get back to us.  Try to get him to join this forum.  Please remeber that you can only support him, you can't make him stop -- he has to do that.
PS:  You need to get some help for yourself, also -- try Alanon and talk to your own doctor for suggestions.  I'm sure you'll get more here.  

[Astray]

I don't have any direct knowledge of methadone but I do know its notoriously difficult to withdraw from and that those withdrawals last for a long time do to the fact that its stored in fat, muscle and even bone. I expect he would need a support system to succeed, hopefully others will be able to give better advice on what that would entail.

Its worrying that he uses other drugs at the same time, I thought the one advantage of methadone was that it prevented the need to use anything else as it prevents other opiates working. Do you know what else he is taking? Does his unstable behaviour coincide with his attempts to withdraw?

Relationships with addicts can be very difficult and its likely you need some support too, there are organisations that are out there to support the relatives of addicts (such as AlAnon I believe) so it might be worth seeing if there are any meeting in your area.