oxy help

[chessclock]

Hello this is a first timer to the board. Please respond to ***@****
I have been addicted (or at least I think I am) to oxy for over a year now. Two cancer surgeries and two knee surgeries can leave some serious pain) but no excuses. I am a fully, well almost fully functionaing addict. No one knows of my delema. I start my day by chewing a 40 and taking 4 percocette. Yesterday I started logging the amount I took. 6..40's, 16 percocettes and 9 ir's and never felt a huge buzz and run a huge professional organization. My tolerance level has dramamtically increases over the years. Now the question. I want to start a weaning off program on my own and would like advise and guidance. Please help!
thanks and G-d Bless! <><
again please respond to ***@****

[Angelica]

.......I never knew you had SI problems{Re: june 9, posting).  I haven't been as thorough in reading the post as I used to be.  Every now and then I pick a thread and read through it.  I did realize that  you had back problems, but didn't understand it included the SI.  This is one of my major problems.  Widening of the SI joint arthritis/bones spur of which there is no medical surgery or medication to help.  I can say, I know what you are going through, and this pain is a real pain in the you know what!!!!  Thomas is right in what he says, and he always amazes me.....you would think he's a chronic pain patient.  It's like he knows exactly what to say, and I admire that.  Well, I have another pharmacy story:  I went to a small pharmacy to get the Oxys filled, and they told me they were low, and could only fill half.....I said oh, here we go again.  Thanks to this site, I know better.  I had called a few days prior and they told me that a shipment was coming in......well, what the hell did they do??? eat 'em all!!!  So, I hesitated, and told her that I had spoke to one of the pharmacist, and etc etc etc....then she tells me she will be able to fill the whole prescription on Friday.....can you believe this?? Only after I told her I called prior to going there.  Oh well, another day in the life of Oxycontin.  
Your pain pal,
Angelica

PS....Even my husband told me that I should be suspicous of them, and they were probably trying to keep half of my prescription, and he's not all that up to date on this mess/ordeal.

[Wizard]

Hi jenny. Did you get my e-mail? I hope I had the right address.
Power & Magick 2 U,
Wiz

[jennyfla]

Yay, i'm so happy for you Skipper!!!!!!!
Now be careful out there driving around in your truck, it's a crazy world out there!!!!  :)
Lv Jenny

[Wizard]

Way COOL man! Reading that news just now makes me know that prayers can be answered! But I didn't have any doubt anyway.Look dude, you take it it easy and take take it a day at a time. Don't want to read that you got so excited that you over did it to soon! Hang in there and I'll still keep you in my prayers.
Power & Magick 2 U,
Wizard

[skipper]

just came from x-ray study & evaluation at the neurosurgeon's office. I'M FREE OF THE NECK BRACE!! the spinal fussion looks good
so far! back to work july 9 (half days for the first 2 weeks). can
hardly contain my happiness. it's been an up hill fight since may 14. Would like to thank everyone for support thru some very dark
times. will post more later, want to find out how it feels to drive
my truck!

[jennyfla]

Your pain must be so hard to deal with.
Funny about you saying in another post about your wife not liking you too much when you take oxys.  My husband always thought he was being great and wonderful while intoxicated with them, but the total opposite.  He can be a regular a-hole at times, especially when he takes too much!!!!!!!  and then wants more!!!!!!!!!!!!  Look out!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Not a nice scene at all!!!!
Hope your doctor appointment goes well!
Lv Jenny

[skipper]

Jenny: thankyou for your post of concern & encouragement. it really
helps to know i don't go thru this addiction stuff alone. i must say i really admire your cuttin back with the lorcet when on vacation. i seem to remember you talking of it in another post a
while ago. i guess coming back & fallin back in with oxy contin
must have been a bit discouraging. i know i really have trouble keeping a lid on my narcotic intake. being in pain really complicates it. tomarrow i have to go see my neurosurgeon for my
6 week post surgery x-ray study. a lot of things hinge on this. if
there is evedence of bone growth at the fussion site. if there is,
goodby brace, hello driving,& back to work. if there isn,t any bone growth i don,t know what next. getting old and having parts of your body wear out isn't anything i ever planned on. i really don't
want to get a case of the "poor me". my keeshound just came up to
the computer & let me know that it was time for him to take me on
walk.

be careful
skipper

[jennyfla]

Good luck with your detox, i hope it works out for you, stay strong, and i'm sorry about your neck pain, that must be awful.
I was taking oxys before my vacation, and left for the week with intentions of only taking my loracets .5 mg at a time.  I would take .5 around 12ish, then another around 3ish, then another around 5ish, and that was it.  I felt the w/d a bit during the first few days, just mainly tired feeling, but ok.  After about 2-3 days, i was doing ok on that amount, total of 15 mgs.  I wasn't able to get under that without starting to feel some w/d, but i stayed very comfortable with only a total of 15 mg each day.  The only problem i had was sleeping, and i only took a tiny bit of xanax to help with that, but otherwise, i was starting to feel great, and the main thing was, i was starting to really 'feel' again.  I blew it when i returned home into the depressing world of my husband's troubles, but i was doing great.  I feel i was just about ready to cut .5 mg back, and so on...
This is definately the way to go as far as having the least w/d, and if you are strong, and really stay with your dosage, you can do it definately.
I was up to about 60 mg of oxys each day (crushed), i don't remember your dosage, but i was really doing ok.
I hope this helps give you some encouragement.  If i can help you in any way, please let me know, i'm here for you!!!!
Lv Jenny

[Wizard]

Skipper, I'm so sorry it took so long for anyone to get back to you. I just found this post buried down a ways on the forum. First I want to thank you for responding to me up above. The support was greatly needed. Here you are hurting too. I can really relate to what you said about the reoccuring desires for the"Dragon". Just reading the responses and the other posts though was enough to stifle it mentally for me. I hope all is well for you as I know you have a long road ahead of you. Just keep focused and determined to beat this. Strive for the light and you'll be able to make it. I believe in the power of God to help when we ask for it. May Gods peace be with you skipper, I'll be praying for you!
Power & Magick 2 U,
Wizard

[skipper]

hey there everone:
this will be a shot post. After getting way ahead on my oxy rx i've
decided to detox for awhile. If i contnue going at the present rate
of consumption I'll run out weeks to soon. I can go off when i run
out or let my pain doc find out. If i go the latter route I'll be
tossed out. i believe it is better to fall down & call a time out
then to have the  rug pulled out from under with out warnning. i
have seen much good advice since i started reading and posting to
this forum. yesterday i was cleaning out the stash box and i found
a bottle of 60 hydrocodone 5 mgs. tabs. i don't know how i could
have fogotten about them. straight hydro, nothing else. instead of
my morning blast of oxy i/ve taken 20 mgs. of hydro and a 10 mgs of
valium. it is now 11:00 A.M. & I'm not feeling to bad yet. the best
part about this is i decided to do it myself. not my wife, the doc,
or anyone else forced me into this decision. going to try some of the postings about vitamins and see how that goes. don't if i'll be
able to do this or for how long. the pain from my neck surgery is
hovering around +7. i'm depending on some support please.
thankyou for the support so far
skipper

[jennyfla]

thank you so much for the information.
Not really sure my husband should take this route, but it's always good to have all the information possible because making a decision, and taking this route.
I feel my husband back is getting increasingly worse with each passing day.  He's had some bad falls in recent years, and the dr feels it's turned arthritic from injuries.
His type of work is physically demanding, and i'm just trying to prepare in cause the day comes where he just can't work in his field any longer.
He would like to get away from so much physical work by moving into a service management or warranty position, but his illness (addiction) is holding him back mentally, big time.
I fear from his mental health more than anything right now, and for the stability of my family, not mention the toll this is taking on my mental state these days.  Luckily, my job is not too stressful, but i am very much afraid of my job stability, as our company is not doing well at all and i fear a layoff (we're already had one).
I just see my husband getting increasing worse, and i wanted to investigate all possible avenues just in case something where to happen.
There are no easy answers, this time of my life is one of the most difficult i have ever experienced, and feel myself getting sicker and sicker as things get more and more unsure!
Thank you again for the information!
Lv Jenny

[Angelica]

Thanks for this info ss........Jennyfla this is where your husband falls:
(2) Supplemental Security Income (SSI) is a disabilty program administered by the Social Security Administration- it has no work (QC) requirements, but rather is for those whose income and resources fall below certain levels. SSI is not funded through the social security trust funds, but through general revenues of the federal government

[ssfr]

Just the facts:

(1) Social Security disability  requires that one has enough work credits- those are often referred to as "quarters of coverage" or simply "QCs".  The number of QCs one needs is contingent upon their age, but generally someone 31 years of age or older needs 5 years of work out of the last 10 years. Payments are made from the social security trust funds.  Hopefully common sense will prevail- all those who call for privitizing the social security programs must be made to understand that a young worker whose social security contributions are invested in the private sector (i.e. stock market), and who becomes disabled at a relatively early age, will not have enough invested to support the family for even a few months, let alone the rest of that workers life if that worker continues to be disabled.

(2) Supplemental Security Income (SSI) is a disabilty program administered by the Social Security Administration- it has no work (QC) requirements, but rather is for those whose income and resources fall below certain levels. SSI is not funded through the social security trust funds, but through general revenues of the federal government.

(3) Both programs mentioned above are disability programs that assume that one cannot work- that is, they are disabled to work- that is why they are called disability programs. Recent legislation somewhat liberalized the rules, in that someone can actually have limited earnings and still qualify for social security- provided they are actually disabled to work- from a medical viewpoint.

(4) Neither drug addiction or alcoholism can be considered when deciding whether one meets the definition of disability or not.

(5) The assertion that is often made that "everyone" who applies for social security disability is turned down initialily is patently false- nationwide, approximately 23 % of first time applicants are approved.  Approximately 5% more are approved at the second appelate step (referred to as a reconsideration), and then 20-70% of the those who appeal to the third appelate step (referred to as a hearing) are allowed- the percentage is a direct function of where in the country the applicant resides- the hearing step is not performed by the Social Security Administration- but done by an agency that is totally independent from the Social Security Administration (the Office of Hearings and Appeals-aka OHA)- oftimes many, many applicants are approved enmasse by OHA- perhaps to clear the desks of the decision makers- the Administrative Law Judges- anyway- this oftimes leads to mistaken conclusions that the original decision to deny benefits was wrong- who benefits from all this? Primarily the attorneys who get their large chunk of the pie, unscruplous doctors and psychiatrists who write fraudlent reports about so-called disabled patients, and the applicant themselves- who quite often just want to sit home, and let society take care of them- this is not to say that there are not many, many disabled folks who have contributed into the social security system, and who are legitimately disabled and thus deserve every single penny they can get- but workers and taxpayers alike should grow weary of all those who can work, but just want a free ride- and let the wantabee freeloaders know that the system cant support everybody- after all- somebody has to work and pay in-
anyway- I am only posting this to help clear up some of the social questions posted earlier in this thread- hope it is informative.

[jennyfla]

I did want to tell you that i spoke to a legal assistant today, and she told me it would be difficult to get benefits since he is currently working, but did say to apply.  He will get turned down, but apply again and then contact them.  We can't afford for him not to work is the problem.
I wonder if that will get us anywhere with him working.
Your information was wonderful, more than i ever hoped to hear; this forum amazes me, i thank god for all of you!!!
Can he qualify by working i wonder, and should we mention the depression and anxiety and being treated my a pyschatrist, and also the addiction.  I wonder how that will go over with social security.
I know it will take time, but it's worth a try, but he can't not work.
Thanks sweetie.
Good luck!
Lv Jenny

[jennyfla]

Thank you ladies so much for your help!!!
I'm so sorry about your situation Kerrie, i know that must be do difficult to have such pain, and also the problems of money and you're husband's troubles too!  I'll say a little prayer for you that things will work out once the money stops.
My husband sees a pyschiatrist for depression and anxiety, not to mention his addiction.  He just isn't a strong person and falls apart easily.
I feel for him and his pain, but also worry about us (the children), and hope for a secure and safe home for them too.
It's so difficult, but i know things will work out some way.  We are both 'good' people, and i think as long as you are a good person in this world, things have a way of working out; although scarey and very difficult at times, the goodness prevails!
Good luck to you both and thank you so much for your information!
Lv Jenny

[Angelica]

....I was just getting ready to tell you that I don't know all the details  about SSI, and then I scrolled down and saw Kerri and JBs post/reply.  This is what I love about this site.  We are like one big family, and there is always someone here to answer your questions w/ knowledge, care and concern.  I don't even get that from my own family.....just hassles(I seem to be there ROCK), but here, I almost feel awkward at times, because I not used to getting information/help w/o someone wanting something in return.  I love you all a great deal, and thank you for coming to the rescue, yet once again!
Love,
Angelica (:

PS/Jennyfla- You need to jump on this right away,cause if there is one thing I know, its: this takes a while to go through.  It's a fight, but one you certainly can win.....Get the ball rolling!

[cindi]

Hi girls,   All of you  LOL    my sister's  LOL  just wanted to drop in to say hi.....I think my husband is going to have to fly eown and get me,,there is no way in hell I am doing the mountains again...NC is beautiful and tomorrow dad is taking us to florida....my kids are having a blast,,I did read all the posts and I really don't have anything to add.....you guys are great and helpful....this is what we are here for....to stand by each other..you are all a great bunch of girls and I love you all     cin

[J.B. to Brian and Vicky]

I found your comments on Social Security Disability interesting.  I am on SSDI, myself.  I agree about the nerve wracking frustration of getting accepted.  As for me, it took the help of an orthopedic, a rheumatologist, a psychriatric, a gastroenterologist and finally my family doctor to get the okay.  This all took eight months with an initial turndown.  I got my first check during the ninth month and a large retro paycheck about 90 days later. I only threatened to involve an attorney.  The point is, get all the documentation you can and try to stay on top of things.  Everybody gets turned down the first go around so refile immediately. The MGH website has a SS forum that was very helpful to me during all of this waiting game.  J.B.

[Kerrie]

Hi Girls,
  I was reading your suggestion to Jennyfla and I know a little about this so I thought I'd share what I know.
  My husband was a heavy equipment mechanic and suffered to injuries in the last ten years. The last one was to his spine. He can walk thank God, but with a limp. He has awful pain and had a nervous breakdown because he wasn't able to go back to work. Being unable to support his family took it's toll on him. He was seeing a psychiatrist for depression and the effect of living with pain and no longer being the provider. We applied for his social securiety and was turned down .This is usual for everyone. He appealed each time and then got a lawyer when it was time. He got his. This is a long process and nerve shattering. I didn't have enough points to draw social securiety but was drawing SSI after I was diagnosed in 1990 was my disease. It stopped when his SS started. I recieve nothing but my son draws a check untill he turns 18 or graduates. He draws 50% of the amount my husband draws. Your children will draw the same. Example; Say your husband draws a check for 1000.00 each month. Your children will recieve a check each in their own name with your husbands also for a total of 500.00. This will remain untill you last child marries or turns 18.They can draw after age 18 as long as their a full time student in school grade 1-12. Not colledge. I could draw a check along with my son but it would still be for a total of 50% regardless. Then mine would stop when my sons stops. So I told them to just put it all in my sons check. My son will be 18 in October but he won't graduate untill next May. I don't know how we are going to make it then. I can't work and I can't draw off my husband even though I'm permanently disabled.
   If you choose to go this route Jennyfla, if your husband will start seeing someone (psychatrist) it will greatly help his case. Also, his being addicted could help his case. I'm sorry for your troubles. I know how hard it is. Your in my prayers.
   Angelica, I'm glad your getting help for your pain. I stay so tired. But I don't ever get enough rest. I know this is part of my problem. The pain is there day and night. I'm still just taking 3 lortabs (7.5) a day but having to take one during the night  now. I know I need to get something stronger but like you, it does concern me. But the pain is pulling me down so I know I have to do something. God bless you and your all in my prayers.
     Love,
         Kerrie  

[jennyfla]

Going back to your disability post, i have a few questions for you.  I was just wondering how much disability benefits actually pay?  I work full-time, but with three children to support, i just don't make enough, and he would still need quite a bit of an income for us to survive, that's my fear.  Not to mention the medical bills that have piled up.  Right now, we have 11 of them to pay, although none of them are huge, they still all want something each month.  They are bills from my husband, daughter, and me.  I dislocated my finger end of last year, and have a hospital/finger dr/rehabilitation for my finger, to pay.  My daughter feel off a bike last month, and had to go to the er for a catscan because she bumped her head hard.  We now have all those charges to pay, minus what the insurance picked up, but still, you know how that goes.  I have two separate bills for an u/s i just had last month because i feared something was very wrong with me, i had a bad ache in my side and feared my addiction was taking it's toll on my liver/pancreas.  I looked fine, thank god, but did have slight elevated levels on one of my pancreas enzymes.  Dr said it could be pancreatis, so i came clean and fessed up about everything.  He was just so wonderful about everything, and is very knowledgeable about addiction.  I may need him again some time soon for my husband.  He's an internal dr. and really knows his stuff.
Another question, what my husband really needs is to go back to rehab.  He went to a 28-day program back 2 1/2 years ago at a wonderful rehab here in Florida.  He really needs to go back and get straightened out before he dies.  I know the pills and alcohol are really taking their toll on his body, not to mention the real pain he experiences from his back.  The dr believes it could be athritis in is back from injuries.
Can you give me any idea on how much disability pays, i just fear it's not much and how would be survive.  The idea of him getting retrained for a different occupation would be a dream come true.  There are so many different things he could do, and with the training in another field, he would still make the kind of money we would need to survive.  Possibilty the medical field as a tech of some sorts would be wonderful.  Anything that wouldn't require him to have to be in all kinds of wacky positions bending over in the heat of the florida sun.  He just can't take it anymore!
Ideally, if he could get this all approved, and go to a rehab, get cleaned up, go to school, and get retrained so he wouldn't feel so trapped anymore, i think he might be able to deal with the addiction.  I don't think he would need the pain meds if he wasn't working his back so much day after day.  Anyway, he just can't handle pain meds, he is just way to addictive and cannot handle them at all.  He just isn't the type of person who can take any kind of drug and get away with it.  He needs more and more and more, and more is never enough.
Any ideas sweetie, i appreciate your help like you just don't know.  I feel there is hope now, maybe there is a way out before it kills him.
Thank you again!
Lv Jenny

[jennyfla]

Wow, great information, thank you so very very much!!!!
I will definately look into this.
He has a dr who gives him steriod injections which are supposed to strengthen his back, but he doesn't feel any relief from them at all.
They are $400 a shot, and he's about fed up with getting shot in the back.
He's a bigtime addict, i think they designed the term after studying him, he's really bad!!!
I only wish he had the strength to resolve his 'problem' so he could get well and live happy again.  He is so caught up in the world of addiction, he doesn't even know how to 'feel' anymore.  I feel with my addiction, it's not anywhere near as bad, so i really am able to 'feel' many things still.  I only pray mine doesn't get worse.  I know i'm playing with fire, but i am also trying to get a handle on it.
Thank you again for the info, at least this is something to strive towards, i feel there is some hope somewhere.
Take care!
Lv Jenny

[Angelica]

...I'm not sure if this will help, and I haven't had to do this yet, but I was told to call a social security disability attorney (you really need this these days, because of all the problems w/ ssi), and ask them about making a claim for disability.  They will fight for you.  It doesn't cost a thing, because they will get compensated from the settlement only if they win. He will probably need a doctor to put a percentage on his disability, like I'm 25 or 30% total body, disabled.  The reason the # is so low, is because if I'm ever in another accident, I won't be declared.....fully disabled already. Then he can apply for a vocational rehabilitation grant to go back to school.  Depending on how disabled he is, the grant will pay for everything.  If he hurt his back from doing this type of work, he really needs to consider a new field.  He could get the vocational rehab grant now, because it doesnt consider household income...only disability.  I was in college when I got into this mva, and this is why I know about these procedures....but, I never went back to college, I decided to help my husband w/ his business instead.  Take care!
Angelica

[jennyfla]

I was reading back through this thread, and wanted to respond about your tired feeling.
I was experiencing this bigtime when i tried to cut back on the oxys and loracets back a couple of weeks ago.  I'm better now because i decreased my dose and my bodies' adjusted for the time-being that is, that's unless i start getting very abusive with these things again.
Anyway, i believe what you are experiencing is a withdrawal effect for sure.  Your body is getting use to the dose and wants more, or you've cut back a little bit and your body doesn't like it.
These oxy's are a strange beast, and i spend a lot of time trying to figure out exactly how they work and what effects they have on the body.
My husband is a bigtime addict, and i've been watching him closely for a long time.  Nothing i do short of throwing him out of the house does much to control his habit, so i might as well learn from it and see if i can help him in any way possible.  Unfortuately, part of my way of dealing with this addiction was to numb myself too, so now i am an addict too!  :(
Good luck to you, and i feel sorry for your pain you experience.
My husband also suffers from back pain, but i'm not sure if that would go away if he were to quit all the meds, kind of like a withdrawal effect (achy everything)!!!  Not in your case i'm sure, but i know my husband would be much better off without the drugs, they change him into someone i don't even know.
Good luck to you!!!
Lv Jenny

[cindi]

Hey  chickie chick....about a month and 1/2 ago she diagnosed me with the Fibromyalgia I thought I told you  lOL    maybe not quite that long ago...anyway  she also did an MRI and it showed alot of **** in my lower back.well,  not really ****  but you know what I mean  LOL.now she has no problem with the pain medication     some days I feel better than others....i hope you get things squared away.....I know how hard it must be for you as far as the pain and the meds etc...you sure have had your share of struggles with all you've been through  hey, I leave in the morning...NC then Florida.....I'll try if I have time to send you some mail before I go  if not I'll get ya from there I have access to a few different computers LOL    hey JB  I just read what you wrote about trying the heroin but it being illegal etc...LOL  that is funny because during the time I was shooting my body full of demerol etc...I would never ever think of snorting coke  LOL  I didn't want to become and addict.....strange huh?   ok guys  about 19 hours to go      love to all   cin   (angelica's older sis,  Charlie's other angel  LOL)