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Avatar universal

pregnant addicted and scared

Ill start by saying this I was,always told pregnancy wasnt in the cards for me due to health reasons iv had cervical cancer since I was 17, endometrios & am now 23. I went to get help for my addiction to oxycodone and xanax I was taking like 9 30mg oxycodone a day and 3 2mg xanax at night but when I went I shockingly found out I was pregnant and bc my plan was to go cold turkey in the hospital bc I didnt have insurance to.get any other type of help I couldnt  do it bc I was pregnant so I continued use but tried to use very little well for unknowm causes I lost the baby at 6 weekson feb 14th of this year. Devistated I continued to use and began the process of getting insurance I finaly did went to my gyno got a ultrasound to make sure everything was normal that.there was no need for a d&c. also found put the cancer was back but in the same visit waa told bc my edirum was so thick I was either gonna start my period pr I was pregnant again. It was a longgg 3 weeks later when I woke up to use the restroom and there was bright red blood in the toliet needless to say I freaked and took a home pregnancy test which quickly read positive so I went to the hosiptal to make sure everything was alright and it was I was 3 maybe 4 weeks along. Knowing I needed to get off all medicine I quickly went and detoxed at a specail hospital for pregnant woman who are addicted they put me,on subutex which I was to continue my whole pregnancy but I couldnt stand the thought of having to keep my baby in the hospital for a week before I could bring him/her home and the thought of my child withdrawling killed me but also I couldnt keep up with the program they wanted me on with.the tiredness and morning sickness which.i.have bad and I didnt want to take anything for it but ended up havong to it was just very dofficult and bc I couldnt keep my attendance up I would have been denyed the subutex anyway so I took it upom myself to taper off of it  but I under estimated the power of this drug I never wanted to be on it a whole month to begin with but it happenes and im deathly afraid of withdrawls for my babys sake so I tried ro just go off and see if one oxycodone a day would do the trick and I still had trouble so I had one 8 mg subutex left and iv been quatering it and taking knly a quater of asubutex aday along with one oxycodone niw I only have one quater left and it for tommorow I tried just gping off and it didnt work like I said I greatly under estimated the power of it bc I took two oxycodone and still needes to take the quater of a subutex so now im taking two oxycpdome a day and a quater pf a subutex but like I said I onl t have a quater left which is two mgs and iv been taking the oxycpdpne for five days one for 3 days and.2 for the past two days and today I woke up with sever lwg cramps sp I tpok a quater and a oxycpdone and im fine  but its also only.9am and im afraid I will need to take another oxycpdpne later  but im also scared fpr the day after tom whwn I have no subutex left I absolutely do not want to be giving my child anything that will harm it but I also dont want to go into wothdrawl and lose my baby iv lost one that enough and cpnsiderong iv had many bleeding xomplications and have been put on bedrest and im only 10 weeka im just scared my plan is to take only a half extra today and tom actualy for the nwxt few.days seeing how I will no longer be on aubutex amd have no subutex back up for about the next week I plan take one and a half then juat one for 3.dayz and a half for 4 days the a quater after that for a few days. So for the next.2-3 weeks it will just be oxycodone then nothing whoch I will continue for the rest of my life this has been a gruling scary tricky process so I guess my questipns are is my plan smart and reasonable any other suggestions would be greatly apreciated and my other question is do you think thos will harm my baby should I wait till the second trimester to be safe or is sooner the better. Might I add just seen last week and the baby is perfectly ok right now despite my bleeding complications. And all bleeding has stopped since my last sonogram.any advice
17 Responses
Avatar universal
Hi there. You sound very scared and I understand. Congrats on your pregnancy.

In my opinion, you really need to e working closely with a doctor. They need to know what you are taking. Dosing on your own and trying to come up with your own plan isn't a good idea especially considering your high risk pregnancy.

Can you go to your ob/gyn and tell him/her exactly what you have been taking and let them know that you would like their help?? Many people have safely taken Oxycodone or other opiates during pregnancy and have given birth to beautiful, health babies but its very important to work with your doctor on this. Doing this on your own isn't safe.

Best of luck to you and reach out for some help. It's our secrets that keep us sick.
Avatar universal
I am scared dealthy scared of losing another child like I said iv been told I cant have kids so I was shocked to find out I was pregnant miscarry and be pregnant again so soon. Its my little mirical which my life surrounds. My ob knew I was on subutex but I went off them without his knowledge but was told by my subutex dr. told me I would be ok as long as I wasnt sick but like I said I couldnt keep up with the program so I couldnt get anymore scripts so I thought id be okas lonh as I wasnt withdrawling and I wasnt and I rtapered down just fine but the day I just went off is the day I started tobtake the oxycodone which isnt vlcidion its roxicodone a quick acting form of oxycotin im aware that I can take vicodone safetly and will be getting that perscribed about the middle of my second trimester bc iv been on pain pills for six years since I was 17 for alot of medical issues but im worried that if I just keep taking the oxycodone it will hinder my babts development and I get sick everytime I take one because of the guilt since they arnt perscribed anymore but im to scared to tell my dr I started taking these again for fear of being looked at like an addict that stupid box that your put in and fear of being dented pain,medication further into my pregnancy when I really do need it. Im a firm believer in an addicts right to receive pain management just like everyone else. My nom currently is the one helping me try to figure this out but shes more clueless then I. I dont want to take these oxycodone till im petscribed something I want off this stupid subutex safetly and able to not take anything till advised by my dr. I just figure if im,not sick we will both be ok
495284 tn?1333897642

I would talk with your OB about a taper plan and go from there.  That way he/she can monitor you and the baby thru the process.  I just dont want you to run completely out as that is no good for you or baby.  You will get thru this so keep posting as we are here for you.
480448 tn?1426952138
Yes, you absolutely need to be doing this with the help of your OB.  As you seem to know, it's very dangerous to w/d during pregnancy, and you have a high risk pregnancy.  Please be 100% honest with your OB and let them help you figure out the safest way to proceed.  Doing it on your own is not a safe way hon.

Hang in there...we're here for you!
Avatar universal
Consulting a dr isnt possible. this is happening now iv quit so many timea before and I am very intune with my body. The first sign of withdrawl ill take something but like the past two days iv had to take two oxycodoneamd iv only taken one and im fine other then aches and pains. It takes 7-14 days for ypur body to become dependant on a substance so I guess you could say im getting off the subutex by using something to ensure no withdrawls. I wish I would have listened to myself instead of the drs concerning subutex its a wonderful drug for substance abuse but like suboxone I dont beilve it shpuld be taken over a period of time and yes im scared but im also thrilled andv proud of myself.. They woulda taken me off it after my pregnancy and my baby would withdrawl in the hospital and I would have to I couldnt imagone bringing home a newborn and withdrawling esp as bad as ppl have saidit is
Avatar universal
And thank you for all the postive feedback. ..I apreciate it.. Its nice to talk to people about this it makes me feel a thousand times better that im not alone
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495284 tn?1333897642
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