still hurting

[miageee357]

3 and a half years ago I had a roxicet addiction.I was doing about 5   30mg blues a day(snorting them).I kicked it cold turkey.I know that the mind plays tricks and when I think back I remember that you could of hit me with a truck and I would not fall a sleep.(literally)It was by far the hardest thing I ever did in my life.11 months ago was handed a 10 mil perk and I snorted a small piece and ate the rest.in turn ,it started me again.I promised my self that i would not touch the blues anymore and when i could not get a perk I went and grabed a couple blues and boom 11 months went by and I started to relize the road I was going down. so I knew I had to stop before I caught my last problems miligrams.so I stopped when I got up to 3 a day.I did not think it was going to be this bad again.so when I quit, I heard about the suboxon and I had a feeling to beware because of all the people saying how good they worked.I can tell you I feel like I made a deal with the devil.so cautiously I only bought 3 8mg and 1 subutech and 3 zanex  6 zanex to help with sleep.can I tell you that I stretched those pills for a little over 2and a half weeks and this is day 28 and I am still craving and can not sleep.seems like I am worse this week then last.I had 2 little crumbs left like 5 days ago so i sniffed them 2 crumbs as of 3 days ago.(big mistake)I thought I was good until it was gone and now I am still ******* not sleeping.(worse since)I mean I am going nuts!4 weeks guys.what is up?is it because I stretched the subs out to long and made it habit like?or is it because I sniffed the last few crumbs?some *** hole told me that it would work to sniff.last time I was having head games but not this strong this long into it..I mean it is wearing me down.I have a 7.5 loritab in my girlfriends medicine cabinet and I am thinking about breaking it in half.its 10.40 on sunday and I still can not sleep.my advise is that I think that everything is no good. you have to deal with it in some way. because subs I feel.simply put.making a deal with the devil.I thought I would trick the addiction in every way shape and form(tiny bits of subs and staying under 100 mg of the blues..not the case.NOT EVEN CLOSE!!!.any input would help.
CAN NOT BELIEVE i AM STILL TRIPPIN

[Lucky2bAlive]

You are now going through the withdrawal of the sub. Like you I tried sub for as little as 3 weeks thinking that I would not be come addicted to it that fast but I was wrong. I was using about 200mg a day on my last relapse after 13 months clean. I only used for about a month and was able to keep it much lower then the last time I quit (20-25 roxy 30mg daily). But I found that my withdrawal was still pretty damn bad. Your brain never really adjusted and everytime you relapse it just gets more and more painful. I understand why you used suboxone and how much it helped you but now is going to be a challenging time. Because you are no longer taking suboxone which had for the most part blocked your cravings you will have intense cravings to use. Even more then if you had just gone c/t. Suboxone imo is a nasty drug and only prolonged the inevitable. You just gotta hand in there for a few days and your going to feel better then you did even on the suboxone. Yes your sleep will come back. It just takes time. You need to make sure you are prepared for the cravings you will get. Get rid of that pill asap. You do not need anything around you and you need to be 100% about this if your really going to quit. Attend NA meetings. Join people just like you going through the same. You are not alone. Theres millions of addicts in the world suffering just as bad. It is a terrible life waking up struggling to get a pill to not feel sick. Think of what it does to your body to make you feel that way. It changes the chemistry of your brain and just downright F****s you up man. Ive been an addict for 7 years now and I can tell you that the path your headed is not good. Let me spare you the pain and suffering of continuing this path. If you take that pill and start pills again it will only get worse. It gets harder each relapse until its almost impossible to stop. Talk to us on here we are here to help each other. I wish you luck my friend. Stay clean for me please.

[miageee357]

thank you throwin da  i deeply appreciate your reply. and yes I still have not slept. my first question is.if i went 28 days cold turkey would I still not be able to sleep?2.is the detox the same if it is the suboxon bothering me?and 3. if i took 1 7.5 loricet would it mess me up bad? I cant sleep !and i will not eat no more zanex.this is so constant and I know alot of you are going through it rougher.just , I do not remember not sleeping on day 28.what is the deal?I thought when I think back day 28 was small craven and thought my sleep was o.k by then just odd dreams and mind games.I thought I remember like 3 days bad 1 good then the next week 2 days bad 1 good then the next 1 day bad and 1 day good. I mean the sleeplessness I feel now is equvilent to my 2 nd week the first time! I feel like I am going to have a break down? someone else told me aderaol ,I do not know what to believe anymore ?

[throwindatowl]

Im sorry to hear your suffering! These pills are really a very sad thing. Just looking at one can mess things up for me!!! Ive quit roxis after a couple years of starting and stopping. Your body remembers the pills and so Ive heard each time gets harder and harder to quit. Ive also tried the miracle drug suboxone-worst stuff ever!!! Way worse than roxis. You meantioned you still had a pill. You cant feel better til you stop taking any opiates but I understand you need sleep. Damned if you do, damned if ya dont. You quit without subs once you can do it again. Subs turn a bad 3 or 4 days into a bad 3 or 4 weeks!!! Make a plan to quit and you will. I hope and pray I never see another blue ever in my life. I consider it poison now. I dont plan on poising myself anymore.