Aa
the broken collar bone addict
so as some of u may know.Yah i caved yesterday just took a few.Well today the pain is back just the same,causing tears and the w/d is back.N i am not taking anything cept my naproxen.i am very moody angry restless stomach pains it hurts to type this i am going to takea hot bath now. and tuff this out cause i am thick headed i may have to admit myself soon,should i be in this much pain?i am suseptable to infections,they cut me open i had a hole in my lung,i told them this and the gave me nothing for antibiotics.i am contactin a lawyer tomarrow,this hospital sux.
well, i was very busy today.I think it turns out the collar bone was healing wrong,i rebroke it today and most of the paiun went away,wierd i know,i wasn't really doing much n it just went POP.
I got thru the day tho and am resting now.I did alot today,normaly i am in more pain after,but after the pop if feels much better,i really need this looked at and set properly
I got thru the day tho and am resting now.I did alot today,normaly i am in more pain after,but after the pop if feels much better,i really need this looked at and set properly
Ok bud, i better get off the pc and get busy for awhile, i'll be back latter.
Good to see you surviving.
Good to see you surviving.
today isn't too bad.awoke in a ton of pain again,stiff.Took my supplements and naproxen,it has subsided some.But well enuf that if it doesn't get worse,i can make the day not needing anything strong.That is what i pray for.
That is all i shoot for.It scares me.Remembering what i went thru aftyer back surgery.Laying in bed unable to sleep ,sweating and cold,unable to eat,vomiting,lack of bowel movements,In more pain than while using what they told me too.For 7 days.That was 4 years aggo.But seems like yesterday.
I pray everyon ehas a good day and stays strong.I know more than anyone that these things only cause more pain when abused,been there done that.
That is all i shoot for.It scares me.Remembering what i went thru aftyer back surgery.Laying in bed unable to sleep ,sweating and cold,unable to eat,vomiting,lack of bowel movements,In more pain than while using what they told me too.For 7 days.That was 4 years aggo.But seems like yesterday.
I pray everyon ehas a good day and stays strong.I know more than anyone that these things only cause more pain when abused,been there done that.
Terribly sorry you took offense to my posts. I was simply reading statements YOU yourself posted that were concerning. Like this one:
The worst of the addiction for me is the way the elevate my mood and take anxiety away. .
Pain certainly needs addressed, without a doubt, it's just a slippery slope you're on, being an addict. It's very hard to determine with the pain and addiction, where one starts, and another one stops.
I wish you nothing but the best.
The worst of the addiction for me is the way the elevate my mood and take anxiety away. .
Pain certainly needs addressed, without a doubt, it's just a slippery slope you're on, being an addict. It's very hard to determine with the pain and addiction, where one starts, and another one stops.
I wish you nothing but the best.
I'm so sorry to hear that you didn't get proper medical attention. I can relate:
My b/f had hip replacement surgery because his primary didn't diagnose him properly soon enough to avoid having to resort to such a major surgery. Then the Surgeon botched things up. Said after surgery that he couldn't say for sure, but that he thought there may be a hair line fracture in the leg from where they put the implant in the femur. Because he is young (mid 40's) in comparison to his typical patients he had him up moving around on it right away. That caused his leg to fracture. I heard the snap when he stepped backwards onto my foot. They didn't seem concerned at all. Thought it was just a ligament that snapped. A couple weeks later when he went in for a follow up they saw the fracture and said they had to do the surgery again!!! This time they had to put bands on his legs to hold the broken bone together and the hospital treated him like he was second class compared to the previous visit. Turns out the Dr lied and wrote in the report that he fell. He never fell!! They said he was going to be in a lot more pain, so they had him taking 2 to 3 fast acting 10 mg oxy every 2 to 3 hours plus 2 vicodin ever 3 to 4 hours. When he tried to get refills the front office people treated him like a drug seeker saying no way could anyone take that much pain meds. He was following Dr orders like this for a couple weeks. He told them he thought he was taking too many and they said 'oh no, you need them even if you think you don't. You need to stay ahead of the pain and you are hurting more than you realize because of the pain meds". When he ran out he was sicker than a dog for a few days. Then they questioned him about why he was taking so many. Thank God I was there when they told him to take them like that so I was able to back him. What a nightmare!! They wound up filling his vicodin and he is now down to 1/2 to 1 5mg a day. It's ridiculous that they push them on you, then treat you like an addict when you need them refilled. And he wasn't abusing them. The bottles said to take them like that. But the treatment he got for the Dr covering his butt by saying he fell on top of it was the icing on the cake along with the drug comments. If his primary had read the x-ray report which stated exactly what it was (dead femur and ball joint) then we wouldn't have had to go through all this.
That being said, that's why I admire your strength after witnessing first hand how our medical system treats people. He found that trying to stay busy with projects and frequent breaks in between helped him keep his mind off his pain and the w/d's. I wish you the best and hope to see some posts again from you in the future.
My b/f had hip replacement surgery because his primary didn't diagnose him properly soon enough to avoid having to resort to such a major surgery. Then the Surgeon botched things up. Said after surgery that he couldn't say for sure, but that he thought there may be a hair line fracture in the leg from where they put the implant in the femur. Because he is young (mid 40's) in comparison to his typical patients he had him up moving around on it right away. That caused his leg to fracture. I heard the snap when he stepped backwards onto my foot. They didn't seem concerned at all. Thought it was just a ligament that snapped. A couple weeks later when he went in for a follow up they saw the fracture and said they had to do the surgery again!!! This time they had to put bands on his legs to hold the broken bone together and the hospital treated him like he was second class compared to the previous visit. Turns out the Dr lied and wrote in the report that he fell. He never fell!! They said he was going to be in a lot more pain, so they had him taking 2 to 3 fast acting 10 mg oxy every 2 to 3 hours plus 2 vicodin ever 3 to 4 hours. When he tried to get refills the front office people treated him like a drug seeker saying no way could anyone take that much pain meds. He was following Dr orders like this for a couple weeks. He told them he thought he was taking too many and they said 'oh no, you need them even if you think you don't. You need to stay ahead of the pain and you are hurting more than you realize because of the pain meds". When he ran out he was sicker than a dog for a few days. Then they questioned him about why he was taking so many. Thank God I was there when they told him to take them like that so I was able to back him. What a nightmare!! They wound up filling his vicodin and he is now down to 1/2 to 1 5mg a day. It's ridiculous that they push them on you, then treat you like an addict when you need them refilled. And he wasn't abusing them. The bottles said to take them like that. But the treatment he got for the Dr covering his butt by saying he fell on top of it was the icing on the cake along with the drug comments. If his primary had read the x-ray report which stated exactly what it was (dead femur and ball joint) then we wouldn't have had to go through all this.
That being said, that's why I admire your strength after witnessing first hand how our medical system treats people. He found that trying to stay busy with projects and frequent breaks in between helped him keep his mind off his pain and the w/d's. I wish you the best and hope to see some posts again from you in the future.
It is unfortunate that you are going through this crap. And that you don't have a good doctor who can help. Ten months ago I told my doctor that I am an addict, and that I need to be red-flagged as such. His response to me was...
"Good for you. Very few people can admit that they have a problem, and fewer still will ever do anything about it". I will never forget his words.
Although I'm red-flagges, I can, as stated above, still get meds when necessary. The honesty with my doc and the red-flag just makes it harder to lie my way to pills, something that I became a pro at over 15 years.
All the best to you.
"Good for you. Very few people can admit that they have a problem, and fewer still will ever do anything about it". I will never forget his words.
Although I'm red-flagges, I can, as stated above, still get meds when necessary. The honesty with my doc and the red-flag just makes it harder to lie my way to pills, something that I became a pro at over 15 years.
All the best to you.
well i don't want to look the devil in the eye,that is setting up for failure for one.
was just sayin it doesnt feel safe having them sit here even though i don't use them daily or even semi daily.It just scares me a lil feeling like i have control knowing it can go very bad very fast.I have been living this cycle since back surgery 5 years aggo that almost killed me thanx to nurses and doctors thinking they know it all and not listening.Then while in the hospital for this mishap the same BS happenned.
I will die before i got that hospital again.Talking to a lawyer soon,they did not set the broken collar bone,didn't do anything for it.i was discriminated against and refused propper care due to no health insurance, a visit to a lawyer is in the works.
I meditate, i know my body very well and listen to what it tells.But when you are red flagged everyone judges you and thinks you are full of s*** and does not listen untill it is too late.
I need to focus on me,i hope i provided support for those that needed it while sharing my Hope strength and experiences.
I have made a few great friends.I am not diseapearing but done sharing with the public what i am going thru i think jusat for awhile.Tleast untill i am not in so much pain.
was just sayin it doesnt feel safe having them sit here even though i don't use them daily or even semi daily.It just scares me a lil feeling like i have control knowing it can go very bad very fast.I have been living this cycle since back surgery 5 years aggo that almost killed me thanx to nurses and doctors thinking they know it all and not listening.Then while in the hospital for this mishap the same BS happenned.
I will die before i got that hospital again.Talking to a lawyer soon,they did not set the broken collar bone,didn't do anything for it.i was discriminated against and refused propper care due to no health insurance, a visit to a lawyer is in the works.
I meditate, i know my body very well and listen to what it tells.But when you are red flagged everyone judges you and thinks you are full of s*** and does not listen untill it is too late.
I need to focus on me,i hope i provided support for those that needed it while sharing my Hope strength and experiences.
I have made a few great friends.I am not diseapearing but done sharing with the public what i am going thru i think jusat for awhile.Tleast untill i am not in so much pain.
When do you get your broken collar bone set? I admire your strength dealing with broken bones and trying to NOT take opiates for pain.
NoLife gave you some great advice. At some point in the future all of us may face major surgery - something that requires pain management, and OTCs may not work. Sarah has laid out a plan that I will adhere to if I find myself in that situation - someone picks up the meds for you, they hold the meds and give them to you per the script (hiding them if necessary). Your doc does not write the script with refills. And one concern; you wrote "The only problem is i feel good about having them available and have been resisting taking them..."
You really need to be careful; there have been too many people who've come to this site, stating that they have pills but "want to look the devil in the eye", or having the pills and not using "will define me".
You know all too well that your head never stops; it will convince you that you can take the meds per the script; you've had major surgery and thus deserve to have the pills. And you'll be back on the road that you're fighting so hard to get off of.
Let someone you trust hold the meds. If that's not possible, then tell your doc that once the script is done you don't want refills. Good luck; keep posting.
You really need to be careful; there have been too many people who've come to this site, stating that they have pills but "want to look the devil in the eye", or having the pills and not using "will define me".
You know all too well that your head never stops; it will convince you that you can take the meds per the script; you've had major surgery and thus deserve to have the pills. And you'll be back on the road that you're fighting so hard to get off of.
Let someone you trust hold the meds. If that's not possible, then tell your doc that once the script is done you don't want refills. Good luck; keep posting.
Broken collar bone back surgery and all i have been through.Excruciating pain and having meds at my finger tips and refusing to take them unless my shoulder hurts so bad i am crying is a very addictive behavior,i will check that at the door next time,sorry
!!But not sure,thes emuscle relaxers the neighbor gaave me help alot.forgot the name but i used em for withdrawls once and they worked great for DT's,Going to have the dr. RX me some.
I ranout yesterday tho,maybe she can let me have some more
This entire statement is one big huge red flag. If you really want this, you need to identify your addict behaviors.
I ranout yesterday tho,maybe she can let me have some more
This entire statement is one big huge red flag. If you really want this, you need to identify your addict behaviors.
You'll never know the TRUE level of your pain until you are completely clean. Chronic opiate use (and abuse) actually makes your perceived pain level much worse.
It's definitely difficult to deal with an addiction when you have legit pain, but it seems like you're definitely struggling with an addiction. You're using probably 20% for pain, 80% for mood, anxiety and to stave off w/d. Most times, opiates just are NOT an option in that kind of situation.
If you cannot handle the pain, then you need to find a doctor who will help you find ways to treat the pain. If that involves opiates, you're going to have to wean down to a reasonable level, and have someone in control of them, as obviously, you can't be. My honest opinion is, you're kind of fooling yourself, telling yourself you NEED them for the pain, but yet, to be fair, you haven't had a chance to assess your pain level being completely off. You can't count increased pain when detoxing...that's par for the course, it's rebound pain. Many people find after they are totally opiate free, their pain is MUCH more manageable than they every imagined.
There are no easy answers, but what you're doing right now surely isn't working.
Good luck!
It's definitely difficult to deal with an addiction when you have legit pain, but it seems like you're definitely struggling with an addiction. You're using probably 20% for pain, 80% for mood, anxiety and to stave off w/d. Most times, opiates just are NOT an option in that kind of situation.
If you cannot handle the pain, then you need to find a doctor who will help you find ways to treat the pain. If that involves opiates, you're going to have to wean down to a reasonable level, and have someone in control of them, as obviously, you can't be. My honest opinion is, you're kind of fooling yourself, telling yourself you NEED them for the pain, but yet, to be fair, you haven't had a chance to assess your pain level being completely off. You can't count increased pain when detoxing...that's par for the course, it's rebound pain. Many people find after they are totally opiate free, their pain is MUCH more manageable than they every imagined.
There are no easy answers, but what you're doing right now surely isn't working.
Good luck!
If that isn't the truth huh?I respect honesty!!But not sure,thes emuscle relaxers the neighbor gaave me help alot.forgot the name but i used em for withdrawls once and they worked great for DT's,Going to have the dr. RX me some.
I ranout yesterday tho,maybe she can let me have some more.
The worst of the addiction for me is the way the elevate my mood and take anxiety away.
I ranout yesterday tho,maybe she can let me have some more.
The worst of the addiction for me is the way the elevate my mood and take anxiety away.
any chance you could get a pain reliever from the dr that doesn't bind to opiate/nerve receptors. I know you need the comfort, but when I had the polups taken out of my sinuses last december, was on morhine in the hospital 3 days came home with 20 hydrocodone on dec 22, 'no-brother' gave me a handful of oxy's on Christmas and i was back on the road to hell for 8 months. It was one of the worst times in my life to be havin my head in the wrong place. I made a huge mistake. those little opiate receptors are demanding & gonna bang a gong whenever they are hungry. Doesn't take but a taste to get them started up again.
Yah pretty much,actually i have some,noone is holding them,i just don't want to prolong the withdrawls dragging them out,I caved again i took 2 morphine 15's and my other stuff,Naproxen and b-complex and fish oil. i am comfy for now.
The only problem is i feel good about having them available and have been resisting taking them,Just afraid my head will swell over it and totaly lose it.
maybe it's just that i only have few left and no money for more that is keeping me from them.I am still miserable tho today.
The only problem is i feel good about having them available and have been resisting taking them,Just afraid my head will swell over it and totaly lose it.
maybe it's just that i only have few left and no money for more that is keeping me from them.I am still miserable tho today.
Yhat was me in the first part of this week. Seems like ups and downs are happening quicker for me in the last two weeks. I haven't bathed or dressed yet, just sittin here takin the pile of amino acids, & suppliments. I gotta get around and take the income I finally made yesterday to the bank. It felft good having an income again to allow the wife to write checks.
Anxiety,depressed,awoke in a ton of pain although i slept well.
And all i can think about is using.I nee dto take my supplements and naproxen wtill,hopefully it helps,a bath maybe also.
Very emotional feeling.And wanting to withdraw socialy.just plain miserable and tired.I knew it would come eventualy,i was feeling too good to be true i guess.
And all i can think about is using.I nee dto take my supplements and naproxen wtill,hopefully it helps,a bath maybe also.
Very emotional feeling.And wanting to withdraw socialy.just plain miserable and tired.I knew it would come eventualy,i was feeling too good to be true i guess.
Can I ask why you don't want to take something for your pain if it is that bad? Is it just that you don't want to trigger your addiction? Can someone hold them for you and only give you what you need if it is as bad as you are saying right now? I'm not trying to get you to use, just don't like seeing you suffer in REAL pain, not the w/d pains.
nah tried it once, made me sick as hell.course that was before the pain pill addiction.where i live that stuf is pretty much hot chocolate powder by the time it gets to my small town.
U see my pain med addiction started when i was using cocaine,it helped me to come down.almost killed me a few times.
Then the back surgery ,they gave me so much i should have died.75/mcg patches orally then 180 perc 10's every 2 weeks.
wished i did way too many times,i cry remembering it.Thank god for my fiance she gave me a reason i love her so much.
She just gave me a bath,i feel some better.
Keep pushin on my friend,it is a long road from the depths of hell.soooo worth it in the end tho.
U see i have 1 sone that never came back to me.He is a functioning addict.works hard ,12-14 hr shifts,and crashes where he can, spending all his money on god knows what.following daddy's footsteps.
Just keep comin back.It is the ones we help that keeps us sober.Stay connected always.
I have decide to live here for as long as i need,i hope noone minds me throwin a sleeping bag in the corner for a while.
I have nevver been the A.A. or N.A. type. i prefer to sit n read and educate myself.Suffer on my own kinda i guess.
U see my pain med addiction started when i was using cocaine,it helped me to come down.almost killed me a few times.
Then the back surgery ,they gave me so much i should have died.75/mcg patches orally then 180 perc 10's every 2 weeks.
wished i did way too many times,i cry remembering it.Thank god for my fiance she gave me a reason i love her so much.
She just gave me a bath,i feel some better.
Keep pushin on my friend,it is a long road from the depths of hell.soooo worth it in the end tho.
U see i have 1 sone that never came back to me.He is a functioning addict.works hard ,12-14 hr shifts,and crashes where he can, spending all his money on god knows what.following daddy's footsteps.
Just keep comin back.It is the ones we help that keeps us sober.Stay connected always.
I have decide to live here for as long as i need,i hope noone minds me throwin a sleeping bag in the corner for a while.
I have nevver been the A.A. or N.A. type. i prefer to sit n read and educate myself.Suffer on my own kinda i guess.
Unless you tell me you had to start using heroin, i aint gonna come down on you at all. Been alot of us having a real bad day today.
Take care, keep us posted.
Take care, keep us posted.
Have an Answer?
You are reading content posted in the Addiction: Substance Abuse Community
Is treating glaucoma with marijuana all hype, or can hemp actually help?
If you think marijuana has no ill effects on your health, this article from Missouri Medicine may make you think again.
Julia Aharonov, DO, reveals the quickest way to beat drug withdrawal.
Tricks to help you quit for good.
A list of national and international resources and hotlines to help connect you to needed health and medical services.
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
