imdone, i learned from you!!!!!!! Mag, thank you for standing behind me this entire time, i was a mess and you were there thank you!!!!
I feel good today, i feel empowered!!!! I am going to give it my all to just push through this and pray i do not get worse with the pain and be able to control it the good old fashion way!!!! Naturally.
Thank you all so much for everything:)
Good Morning !!!!!!!!!!
I just wanted to say I know this has been a difficult few days for you but I really can see the new sober Dana. Your strength going into the Dr. has amazed me also, your determination is so strong and well you should be so proud of youself. Sometimes when we are in it, walking through sobriety we can't see how strong and clear we are becoming. however honey I SEE it in you and your decisions. Although I don't experience the pain you have I experience the depression at times. Living sober we FEEL all the good and the bad, I pray the injection gives you the relief you so need and the things the Dr. gave you let us know HOW they help. I see the NEW DANA today and now the not knowing is over so we will battle the depression one day at a time, you have a friend in me always
Your post, dana. A really good way to end the weekend. Not about your pain, but your determination. Amazing.
Thank you all so very much for all the concern and advice!!! Im back with news that i do not need surgery, this is my new way of life and yes its s u c k s but its something i will learn to live with. The dr gave me a big old needle in my hip to help with the pain and i just need to take it easy since its all inflamed. He offered pills and i DECLINED!!! I am not going to lie there was a part of me that wished for surgery just so i can justify taking pills, i know i am a sick addict, but i know i can't go down that road again. Im 5 months clean and trying to just take it day by day. If only i was not hurting it would be easier for me but i am going to fight. The dr prescribed a T.E.N.S. machine (stem) so hopefully that will help a bit. Thank you guys so very much for all your support.
Dang, I wish I would take my magic wand and poof it all away! Dang wand just laughs at me when I try to use it! Listen to Ms. Vicki! I am wishing only good things for you....hugs.
I know pain too.....I a, 6 months clean and get debilitating headaches from 5 brain surgeries!
There is a non narcotic that will help if you have a good doctor.....they will help you find it! I have been trying different non narcotic or narcotic like meds to help. YOU DO NOT HAVE TO LIVE IN PAIN!
And I may have missed the answer but why did you go off the Cymbalta if you are dealing with depression as well? The Cymbalt saved me AND helps with pain.
Please seek help for your pain!!
Thoughts out to you
Laurie
Thinking of you today and remember I know how strong you are!!!!! We are rootung for you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I am trying also to deal with pain and my meds I have went from oxys to hydos and now being very very careful... I want off them for good but the pain always brings them back to me.
Tonite I woke up 1 hour and half after sleeping in pain took a half a pain med with asprin... It ***** for me to be off and on but I am trying to find the happy medium..
I totally 100% agree with Vickie! You dont have to suffer and live in pain. I hope that tomm will bring you some answers on where to go from here. Sending love and (((hugs)))~Bkitty
Best wishes! You are in my prayers!
Good Luck Dane. Sending positive vibes your way.
Bryan
Thank you all so very much for all the support. Today has been a pretty poopy day, i am just lost sort of speak. I have zero energy, i have no attention span, and just super stressed out. My anxiety level is through the roof, and not to mention my face hurts from my fainting episode. I have a nice bruise over my eye and nose, and my heading is pounding. Ok, enough of my self pity, tomorrow is the big day i fly out to NY to see what the surgeon has to say. Thank you again for all your words of wisdom.
I'm in a similar boat as you, though my clean time pales in comparison.
All I can think of is to explore other addiction groups, like food addiction or sex addiction. I find these are different than substance addiction because you can't not eat and you can't not...well, you can, but that's no fun. So I'm going to check them out and see if I can learn management techniques for my own surgery that's coming up. I don't know if there's something there that may be valuable to you, too.
Whatever the case, like others have said, your hard work is NOT a waste. You've done an amazing thing, and that you keep on going despite chronic pain is a testament to your resolve. I hope that you're able to find a solution that you're comfortable with.
I completely agree with EVERYTHING Vicky said. You can do this and there is a solution in all of this. I know how strong you are and I KNOW with hubby, your Dr. and youself, you WILL find the solution. You are in my thoughts today and I know come tomorrow you will feel emotionally some better. Dane you are one strong girl and I will be thinking of you, it WILL be okay.
hi guys i am here not feeling too good as yesterday was a very difficult day for me. I just needed to be alone so i did isolate myself a bit and then went to dinner with hubby as he is so worried about me, and i ordered a drink, and then another, i don't want to hear crap about that either it was better than the alternative. After dinner i fell asleep and was wide awake around midnight, so hubby decided he wanted to talk, well that did go over to well. I am not a talker i internalized all my feelings so he is pulling me for information, poor guy is just so worried about my emotional state and my leg. The questions he was asking me just were so overwhelming, "What if you need another surgery?" What if the dr says this is your new way of life"? ETC..... Well, i got into panic mode got up, to go to bed as i was not feeling well and the dizziness just continued, and BAM i feel flat out on my head/face, and fainted. NOw that i look like a beat up gal, my husband is a mess, i scared the crap out of him and then the poor guy felt so guilty, he feels that he pushed me to hard. What am i a flipping dainty flower!!!!! I should be able to handle a conversation that i am use to, this is not news to me about my medical condition as this is something i have been through my entire life. As for the AD med, no i am not on anything, it didn't do crap and i didn't like the side affects, if i was not in pain i would be fine. "mama bear" I didn't take any meds, i do not have any or access to any, and i don't want any. Rehab never discussed taking pain meds they preach the holistic approach. i will have no choice to come up with a plan after i see what the doc says tomorrow, and yes he knows about my opiate addiction and he is not the kind of man to care about that or understand it, he would just say take the meds. So really i am doomed, i either am going to hear this is the best its going to get and deal with it, or you need another surgery, either way they both s u c k. Seriously it just never ends, and going back on pills will only lead me back to where i was 5 months ago, and that was not a pretty site as allot of you know.
Sorry about being like this, i just do not know what to do anymore....
Okay , I am getting worried here, PLEASE let us know how you are, we ALL care about you and NEED to hear from you!!!!! I just knew when I logged on, we would have heard something from you,we care let us know SOMETHING!!!!!!!!!
Dane.....Be a good girl and let us know what is going on with you. If you dont you wont be a good girl.
I'm so sorry you are feeling this way! Don't you dare give up! You said that to me not so long ago. I'm sorry your pain is bad. Hopefully the doctor can come up with something. I'll say a prayer())))hugs)))) bkitty
Im proud of you for beating your vacuum to death! Now you want me to buy you a new one after I gave you PRICELESS information?? LOL You silly!
It's not easy but we can adjust to it. So we can't take pain meds in huge numbers every single day?? No. It's not good for anyone. But a med for pain?? Certainly. It's all about having a plan just as Sara said before. I just wish this weren't such an issue with people. I wonder if this was discussed when she was at the rehab facility...
I could not agree more! Yes, this certainly does warrant a good discussion! Life happens! Injuries, surgery, dental work, it all happens! The key is to have a well thought out plan and to follow it! I'm not naive enough to think that it's easy, but it is doable! Thanks, for the food for thought!
You still owe me a vacuum!
Thanks for that...I feel strongly about pain management. NO ONE should ever suffer, it's like a kind of punishment and the last thing we should have is punishment.
I think this should be talked about more often. Sometimes we get so guilt tripped about taking meds for pain that we won't. It's wrong and it's not the point of recovery.
I wish Dana would post back. If she did take some meds, she better not be calling it a relapse...
"TAKE THE PAIN MEDS!!!"
I agree. I think it's foolish to be in pain because some guilt trip about taking pain meds.
Dane, get your butt back here or I WILL find you! You are human and I agree with Vicki! Your ice cream is melting!
I'm here sipping my coffee (mmmm delicious) and thinking about you. I see EXACTLY where you're stuck and, you're right, you're miserable either way!
Usually there's a "happy medium" in difficult situations. Look for it. I can see one right now. First, manage the pain and then manage the addiction. One may balance the other...
You can't be in pain Dana. Everyone knows that will destroy quality of life. but, you CAN control the addiction. I've told you this with other words. Just because we've been addicted to pills does NOT mean we can never take them again! We just have to watch it!! So, if you take the pills for pain and find you're taking more than needed because they're so lovable, you'll have to be aware of it and intervene with yourself. That's why you have a support system in place.
You're not an island Dana. You're not alone in this! You've been dealt a pretty s h itty hand in this life so now you need to WORK WITH IT! You can't change anything but you can work around it. I really think you can get to place of comfort and happiness just by compromising and accepting a few things. My advice is to talk with your husband today and get yourself some pain meds. A little chat with the doctor tomorrow is in order as well. There's a solution and a plan for this, just stop being so ------- independent!
Love, Mama Bear