I'm sorry that you are addicted to Hydrocodone, like so many of us on the Substance Abuse forum who are quitting for some of the reasons that you have mentioned. The fact that it "ruined your life" is enough to quit, right now you're not thinking clearly and you're a little confused. Two wrongs don't make a right, many doctors, like mine, figure it out that they are contributing to an addict and cut you off cold turkey, yeah, it's wrong that they don't care to help you to taper, but they aren't motivated to, so most don't bother.
Please join the Addiction community and get support from other addicts about quitting and getting off of this roller coaster and getting your life back. You may not even know what life is right now, come and do some reading and find out about all the benefits to quitting. You ARE worth it!! Don't let some hack define who you are any longer. Take back your control.
You're in my thoughts and prayers,
A Junkie with 13+ years clean and sober. LIz
When you are ready to quit I will be more than happy to help you and answer your question at that time. Thank you for coming to Medhelp.org