pain and addiction

[rdnkgrl]

In Sept I fell and ruptured C5-6 and reinjured my already injured pelvis. (Open book fx @15). I have struggled with pain meds ever since. I wanted off in early december after a TDR performed in nov so i tapered down started zoloft and flushed the rest of the percs. I began feeling so out of control i decided, being a RN from an er, to go to a rehab facility to help me out in detox. They kicked me out after the 3rd day saying i wasnt an addict and opiate withdrawal couldnt be the cause.. got MUCH worse.. bit the bullet and went to my own er where people know me.. i had seratonin syndrome. Saw a psychiatrist who started me on high dose valium to slowly taper me off. I still take it at 5mg qhs. Down from 30mg qd. I was placed back on the percocet at 5mg per day and just didnt like it stopped and started having diarrhea chills etc. Went back to my dr a week later and told him no more opiates. He decided/convinced me to try a low dose subutex .5 for pain management. After 30 days again couldnt stand it anymore tapered to .25mg and stopped. Withdrawals lasted a week though not as severe sickness wise severe mentally. I have no insurance right now and am waiting for disability to kick in so i can get back to therapy for my neck/back. My dr wants me to take perc or vic again daily for the duration of my treatment and pain. I DONT. My family also wants me on them and the second opinion doc does too. They say not treating the pain is worse for healing than treating it. Lyrica, neurontin, otc and rx nsaids dont touch the pain. I just am TERRIFIED b/c if i follow that plan i will be in w/d again. My system is so sensitive to meds. I take 10 mg of viibryd as well and havent been able to tolerate any other antidepressants or a higher dose. Any opinions or thought on my case. One doc says stay on subutex the othet says stay on the percs..i really want none of it but am in pain. I even downplay it juat to get the drs off my back.

[CWKavinRAS]

Your reaction to drugs are not the norm and it would not be responsible to steer you in any direction at this point. The doctors that knows your history and will follow you through your symptoms are the ones with better guidance at this point. The only thing I can tell you , is that I have seen activities like yoga and biofeedback help patients strengthen muscle and lower pain levels more often than not. Whatever you can do to minimize your use of pharmaceutical that causes you other side effects will probably help you. I wish all the best for you.

[rdnkgrl]

AND my doc says im not an addict but dependent. So does my psych. I just think if i go back on it ill never go off b/c i dont handle ANY withdrawal due to the psych issues it causes.

[rdnkgrl]

Btw im only 37 yo and previously really active w/kids at home. Now i cant hardly sweep.