I am very impressed with you tenacity and commitment. I do not believe you caused yourself any permanent brain damage, instead, your brain is now able to heal itself. When you take opiates for a prolonged time like you have, your body's physiology has been altered. Your central nervous system has created a multitude of opioid receptors that all were screaming for endorphins (opiates) to fill them, but your body has now forgotten how to make them by itself. It takes time for your receptors to down-regulate (for the brain begin to heal) and to start making its own endorphins. Brain heals pretty slowly, so it may take months to get rid of feelings of sluggishness, restlessness and depression. The best thing you can do is take good care of yourself, eat healthy food, stay hydrated, keep active and busy. Stay away from sugar, soda, and simple carbs. Do not consume caffeine at least 6 hours prior to bedtime. Good luck and wow!
good god,..90 mg of methadone cold turkey. Why on earth did you go cold turkey? How long were you on the methadone? How old are you?
I am on my 10th full day of cold Turkey withdrawing from 90 mgs of methadone, its so rough. I can't sleep, I have taken a couple of percs, to absolutely no help. The best thing I have taken to ease them some is Valium, but if you are anything like me, it would be easy for me to fall into another addiction.
I have kicked oxys and roxies a few times and it was a breeze to get through that, this is a whole different thing. I wish I could give you some better advice.....I wish I knew what to do for myself, I have never been more depressed or hurt worse in my whole life. Good luck stick to your guns it will have to get better(I hope).