Your sad experience is an example of what's wrong with the way adoptions are being brokered today. Matching expectant mothers with prospective parents puts unrealistic expectations on both parties. A mother can't possibly make a decision as monumental as relinquishment until after her baby is born and she has experienced being not pregnant and the mother of a newborn. She must not be made to feel pressured to part with her child either before or after delivery. And it is indeed unfair for an agency or other broker to let prospective parents believe that getting a baby is a certainty. Prospective parents should not be brought into the picture unless and until the mother has actually signed away her rights.
I agree wholeheartedly with Yooperjo. and feel for your loss LumbeeNativeAmerican. It seems there needs to be a change, and it would be worth writing letters to the powers that be.
All the best to your finding your new arrival soon Lumbee N.A.
It is true, that many birth moms change there mind, or that there true intentions were never to give up the baby in the first place. I gave up four children, and went thru an agency, and seen many of the girls there, alot of them did drugs, and didnt care because they looked as if it wasnt there baby and they werent keeping the baby anyways, also many do it just for financial assistance, the agency provides for them, and it gives them a way out, many girls are decietful, i didnt want to be one of those girls, giving up a baby is truly one of the hardest decisions in the world. I wanted to keep my babies all of them, but in the end i remembered why i was doing it, and i couldnt devestate the parents like you guys, i wouldve felt guilty, but know that its just hard to give your baby away, it truly is, but i honestly would suggest going thru the foster care program, and adopt a baby from them, those are babies already away from the parents and they have lost all rights so i would try there, there are new borns and also bigger kids who just like you want a baby, would do anything for parents think of them as well, wish you the best God Bless!