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Adoption Community
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Avatar universal

has anyone thought about adoption?

My boyfriend and i are definitely not ready for a baby. We have been fighting alot lately and i feel so alone and like i cant do this.  We havent discussed it but i feel like it may be in everyones best interest.  
15 Responses
Avatar universal
If it suits you its a lovely idea. It would be hard but it'd possible. How far are you
Avatar universal
Do whatever u think will be best for the child...n once baby is born get on BC.
Avatar universal
Well how far are you??? If its best go for it but the further u get u might fall in love with your child
Avatar universal
A few women on here have but you would probably have better luck in the adoption forum :) good luck with whatever choice you make  
Avatar universal
Adoption isn't a bad thing n u can also make some couple very happy
Avatar universal
I was wondering if anyones personally gone through it with there first or  know someone who has and how it was for them.
Avatar universal
Adoption is a very beautiful and selfless thing.. You could be carrying the miracle that completes someone else's life. If you aren't ready to be a parent and you feel very confidently that adoption would be the best thing for the baby and yourself, then I would encourage it. If you decide keeping baby is best, then do that. Either way it's a very hard decision, and I applaud you for even being able to seriously consider it.
1 Comments
it is a beautiful thing, i had four children that i gave to three familes, and still have parented two it is a beautiful thing to complete someone elses family i dont know how you could say something so heartless, yes it is a difficult decision, but nothing is permanent in this evil world, the baby will grow up and you can see him/her again!
Avatar universal
Im not finacially stable myself without the father and i am starting to see that we  are just to young. I am 6 months and i love my baby but i want what is best for her and i dont think i can give her everything i would want to. ive held off on feeling like shes mine because i have been thinking about this option for a while. My boyfriend doesnt see it as an option but since weve never actually discussed it (and seeing how our situation is now) i think he might at least consider looking into it to see if its a  better option
1 Comments
it is not a better option......
Avatar universal
I do sometimes. .. i have mixed feelings about it though
Avatar universal
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7530616 tn?1406422610
I was doing foster to adopt. I placed my son with the foster parents that were going to adopt when he was 2 days old but i got him back last month. I couldn't go thru with it I regreted it from day one. Once you have your baby you will get emotionally and physically attached to them its so tough. In the beginning the dad and I didnt think we could do it especially financially but we have so much help. Its such a rewarding feeling to have him back with us♡
Avatar universal
Adoption is a beautiful thing. If you feel like you aren't ready (I wasn't either) and if school and stuff like that is still a problem, adoption is THE best choice. Its such an emotional and amazing experience. Do an open adoption so you can see the child as much as you want and keep total contact. You get to do the things to do the things YOU want to do and still be apart. Adoption is starting a family for people who can't do it for themselves. Its the most selfless thing a woman could ever do. A child is the greatest most precious gift one can give. A birth mom wants the needs of a child before the wants of her own heart<3 I'm a girl what got pregnant and adoption is what I did and it takes one hell of alot of strength but you can do it. Its a healing process but I'll support you in the whole process. I just had my baby little over a week ago. I'm not an expert but girl I'll help(: make the choice that's right for you and that little angel.  
3060903 tn?1398568723
Well how far are you??? If its best go for it but the further u get u might fall in love with your child

WHOA Nelly ~ Only a women that cared greatly and loved their child immensely would be strong enough to give that child to a loving couple that could offer it more in life then they could. I do think that an open adoption where you could stay involved in a healthy way with the child is the best way to go. Your child has a right to the good things in life, but one of those things is their birth mother, and father. What a wonderful way for all to benefit. There's never enough love, nor is there too much accountability. Not only is a birth mother holding themselves accountable, they are also keeping the adoptive parent's accountable. THAT IS REALLY IMPORTANT TOO!!! I don't think i could do it if i had no contact. I would be too worried that the child would be abused.  You cannot lose with an open adoption~ Nobody loses. Everybody wins!~

Jerabera, Congratulations on being such a great mother to your baby and such a loving person to have allowed another couple to also experience parenthood. You're a great person for what you've done. BEST wishes in getting your own life in order.
Avatar universal
Maybe you have to dump the father but keep your child!  I'm 57 and the sorrow has gotten worst with age, not better.  And I found out she cried for me at night. That about tore me apart when I heard that from my 29 year old baby!
What is inherently wrong with you that you wouldn't be an awesome mother? Nothing!! Your baby doesn't need designer clothes and the best stroller, hand-me-downs will do just fine. But you have her DNA and that is irreplaceable. Kids feel like 2nd best when they are not raised by their mother.

Regardless of what you think during the pregnancy, make sure that you keep your baby for at least six weeks after giving birth before you sign TPR. Your baby will be very fragile after birth and needs you more than ever then.  No one else can nurse her and we all know how good that is for a babies health. Just give it some time and if you decide you don't want to parent you will have no problem finding a family. Just know that the best life for your baby is with you. Just be the best mother you can be and you and your child will do great!
15695260 tn?1443705964
Hi there.  This forum is to discuss adoption and all that goes with it.  Let's remember that everyone is different and needs to make the best choice for them.  This may or may not include adoption.  luck to all
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