Alcoholic, Living with an Community
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Avatar universal

Coping with an alcoholic dad?

Long story short my family hasn't had the best luck in life. From being on the brink of losing everything at times to having to deal with me being autistic and not exactly having good life skills. My dad is really important to me and my mom, my mom is disabled after having a surgery to remove a cancerous tumor and my dad helps financially and we love him too. The problem is that he drinks, he was an alcoholic before he met mom and after losing his job and gaining a new one he began drinking again, every night. Sometimes he gets drunk and I get so shaken up because I've had some really bad experiences with him when he's drunk. He wont even listen to me when I try to tell him it's an issue, saying he wont hurt me or anyone. But with how he mentally beats us down when he's drunk, it's hard to believe it wont turn into something worse. Honestly I don't know what to do if he doesn't listen and I can't really leave either because I depend on my parents to function and I don't want to leave mom and our animals alone. It's really hard and I don't know how to cope with it, I hide in my room the moment I hear he's been drinking because it scares me so much. Does anyone have any coping tips, or know of any chat groups online that I can speak with? (I have issues talking with people over phone or face to face)
1 Responses
Avatar universal
Al-anon is the place for families of alcoholics to go and they may have some online support.
He is an alcoholic and powerless to control it himself is the first step in the AA program for alcoholics to learn. You are powerless to affect him, which is the first step Al-Anon will advise you of in their 12 step program.
"He wont even listen to me when I try to tell him it's an issue, saying he wont hurt me or anyone. "

These are both classic alcoholic and alcoholic victim scenarios, where each person thinks they have power to control something they don't - he thinks he can control his alcoholism and you hope to gain some control of him by appealing to him using reason. Neither can ever work, because he will turn the world upside down with unrealistic explanations to justify his reasons to drink.
So please get help at Al-Anon where they will explain to you the ways to cope with this difficult situation.
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