Blackouts

[cam182]

I have been addicted to drugs and alcohol for around 5 years now. My addiction to alcohol was not as extreme as my addiction to methamphetamines, coke, oxycontin, etc. until recently. I quit taking  most pills and would only do coke occasionally but was drinking close to a liter of vodka a night before going out to a party. I have attempted to quit only being able to stay sober for a couple days at a time. When im completely sober my chest hurts i feel incredibly cold and just generally feel weak. I know i need to stop i cant remember a night that i havnt blacked out from alcohol in the past 2 years almost. I do not have the money to attend meetings or the support to do so. Mainly just books and hopefully some good input from those that have been where i am.

[cam182]

Thank you all so much so glad i happened across this site really needed this

[MJIthewriter]

Perhaps you may find this link helpful. (you may want to zoom in if the font is too small)
http://www.legacyaa.com/book/firstMeeting.htm

(they also have a book published there one chapter at a time)
I've been told it's the 12 x 12 that is up there.

[boogieman]

Saw your post--wow. Sounds like me when I was your age. Here are a couple of resources near you (Winchester) that could help. 1st- Blue Ridge area intergroup (AA), 540 667-0322 can direct you to local meetings and help you find people who have been where you are and willing to help you without wanting anything in return. 2nd. http://www.bridgingthegaps.com/ is a facility that provides treatment options near you. Hang in there and give yourself a break. It does get better!

[ibizan]

Drugs r so everywhere in small towns and big cities...they abound!i live in a rural area close to some larger cities......what is so sad is a small town 30 mins from me has heroin in its high school!My day job is alcohol/drug counselor..if anyone woulda told me 25 years ago i'd be doing that job i'd die laffing!it does take a former drunk/dope fiend to know how to work with em!I watch so many ppl young and older ruin their lives with bad choices on a daily basis.......always remember  u always have/make choices.....ALWAYS!glad i made u think....never stop thinking and i hope ur thoughts for ursself head towards a more positive road!:)

[cam182]

Stephens City is a pretty small town its around an hour away from Washington D.C. Not much to do you have to be creative. I think that has a lot to do with the amount of drug use in the area. We are however only 30 minutes away from the Shenandoah River where i spend the majority of my free term wakesurfing behind our boat. I've been here for 19 years though and cannot wait to move. Thank you for helping me out though it really means more to me than you would probably think, so thank you

[ibizan]

u r surrounded by ppl who give u wrong info and tell u ur ok nuthin wrong for they want to keep u as sick as they r...but then i once lived ur life too..i c that ur 19.....ohmigosh what i was like at ur age.....and i'm going on 53 now....def older and wiser and laugh at self when much younger and toasted with the booze and drugs.....so what is Stephens City Va.like?rural?close to what big city?

[cam182]

I was under the impression that you have to pay a fee to attend some of the programs such as asap and alanon just worried about having to attend them i guess other than people on here i have been told nothing is wrong with me over and over so im in a constant struggle for what to do. And drugs are cheap when most the people you know deal them and liquor comes cheap when your surrounded by people who drink on a daily basis, thank you for the support though

[ibizan]

u don't have the $$$$ to attend meetings?first of all theres no cost to attend AA/NA..PLUS where ya getting the money for the alcohol and drugs u take?ur problem is much larger than what a book can handle....if u r really sincere about wanting to stop check out outpatient substance abuse clinics in your county of residence...they get state funding to help u if u want help...plus u hafta help urself!love this saying in AA...half measures availed us nothing..we do like the easier softer way.I've been sober/clean 24 years.....its been hard work and well worth it...u have a lot of work to do and i hope u get going b4 this addiction takes more of u or eventually ur life!