Confused at what dictates alcoholism

[zondorman]

All the advice....all of the pointers on this group lead me to think that i could be an alcoholic.

I am a 38 year old 6ft 3 male and have always drank most nights.

That said i still refuse to believe that a few drinks a night could be so drastic.  i am a big vodka fan and will have 2-3 good cocktails per night (hey i have not had a cold for ages with all the vit c i get in the OJ)...lol

lets say that at worst i drink 2.5lt of absolute vodka a week...do i have a problem?  i do my thing at work and put up with crap that they write books about...oh yes!

I will drink alone if my family are not with me...yes this seems to be bad, but is it more ok if I go out every night, this would cost me a fortune!

i drink for the buzz...why else drink?

no one would know that i drink as it does not effect my day to day.

My Father had a drinking problem but he used to upset people and the drink effected him negatively...i am a controlled drinker...even when i know i have had a good skin full i remain in control and stable...well there was last new years when after 8 hours of free booze i did slip to the floor for a second...made it back to my room though and got on with life.

so...the question is this when is an enjoyer of alcohol (and i will say it...the buzz it gives) an alcoholic???  

There seems to be a thin line and I do not wish to end up with serious health issues or wake up one day to find a bottle in my desk drawer (never)...why is it wrong to enjoy a good drink every night and get a little buzzed after a hard days work?

I leave it to the forum to decide my fate :)

This is a sincere post that deserves only your knowledge or thoughts.

[rpooo]

Hi shazdolly and welcome to MedHelp!

Congradualations on your sobriety. Also way to go keeping it when your out with friends. This proves to be very difficult for most. I dont mean to be blunt but you mentioned hot flashes and so it is tough to say weather or not it's menopause or a withdrawal from the alcohol. If it is because of the alcohol then don't worry it will pass. Everybody is different as far as how long the withdrawal symptoms will last. I hear most people say a week.
As far as the urge to drink it will probably never go away but it will become easier and alot less frequent.

Concerning your question of "Do I have a problem" Let me tell you a couple of things and then you decide for yourself.

Your are in an alcoholic forum.

You are descibing withdrawal symptoms and mentioning it's been difficult for you.

You also drink 1/2 to a full bottle of wine every night.

So with that said, what do you think? Being an alcoholic doesn't make you a terrible person. It means you have a problem and your already doing the exact thing you need to to fix it. Keep doing what your doing, I promise it does get easier.

Randy

[Shazdolly]

Hi I have been drinking a half bottle of wine most nights and when out for a meal almost a bottle . My hubby and I have decoded to stop drinking. However I am finding it harder than he is . I have noticed I am sleepinguch better and in the day more alert at work and on time!! I am having more thany usual hot flushes .. I am 54 . Have I got a problem?? I go away with my girlfriends soon for a weekend I will be the only one not drinking because I don't want to ruin what I've already achieved. I hate the feeling of bring hung over.

[rod44]

Sound to me like you are trying to justify your drinking. Why do you need the "buzz"?

Over time you may develop tolerance to Alcohol, need more drink to get the buzz.This develops over years and can creep up on you, before you know it you have a problem, this problem is compounded by the fact that you are the last person to recognize it, sadly some never do.  

Why do you put up with the "crap at work"?

Have you asked friends & family how they feel about your drinking habit, you need to be open & honest because if you drink alone they may not know this.  

[Punkinhead75]

Hi Zondorman,

We have a lot in common. I'm 38 6"4" and used to drink a lot like you do now.  I don't think I questioned it though.  I just did and enjoyed it and didn't care what anybody else thought.  Looking back I would call that my "heavy drinking stage."  I could drink every night and still work and function ok.  Eventually that stage was left far behind.  I started needing that drink each night.  Then I needed more because I couldn't catch that buzz.  It wasn't soon after that I started drinking earlier in the day and soon on the weekends I'd drink in the morning.  Eventually I was drinking because I had to, not because I wanted to.  Fortunately I am not alone with way I drank.  There are many others out there that were once where you are now.  For me the road wasn't pretty.  I'm consider myself lucky to be where I'm at today.  It's like the other posts say"if you are thinking about it now, you might have a problem"   Hope this helps you figure it out before the alcohol shows you the truth.

[littleflower1980]

The fact that you are even asking this question could be a sign of a problem. It's true that only you can decide if you are an alcoholic. You have to figure out what feels right/wrong to your own mind and heart.
Try controlled drinking. Try having a drink or two and then abruptly stopping. Try it more than once. See how that goes. Or try going to a social situation and not having any drinks while others do. See if it bothers you.
During my active alcoholism, I believed I could not be an alcoholic because I didn't wake up with the shakes or crave a morning drink or things like that. I went to work and paid my bills. But I wasn't living. I woke up so soul sick every morning after I drank because in my heart I knew I was not on the right path FOR ME.
Alcoholism comes in all different shapes, sizes and levels. It does not pick and choose. Some people hit a really low rock bottom and some do not. A very important part of the process to figuring whether or not you have a drinking problem is to be completely honest about yourself and your behaviors concerning alcohol. Hiding things won't make it any easier, and in fact, those secrets will only grow and come back in worse forms later on.
Wishing you the best.

[narla]

I went 9 months twice without a drink and then a 12 month stint without a drink,but as soon as I started drinking again it got back to every day,using all the excuses I could to drink,just abstaining for a week doesn't necessarily mean you don't have a problem.
I am now 376 days clean but I know if I started drinking again it would go right back to a daily routine,I am an alcoholic and I know this because of how alcohol makes me feel,I love the buzz you get,and I'll be honest I miss not drinking.My health is more important though.


Denise

[iris986]

Can you go a week without a drink? if not then there is a problem.

[narla]

I drank every day a lot of the time on my own,because I liked the buzz I got from drinking,I stopped through both my pregnancies, after the births I thought I would be able to just drink socially again but found 1 day led to 2 which led to 3 etc:
I also stopped for a year because I was told not to drink alcohol for that length of time after I had a brain haemorrage and surgery to repair it,once again as soon as a year was up thought I could handle social drinking again,same thing happened,your brain takes over and you start reasoning with yourself that it's ok to drink when you want.

I worked and raised 2 beautiful children,one with Tourette Syndrome,whom I had to teach myself at home,No-one knew how much or how often I drank,I never got abusive,I just felt good.
I used to call myself a high functioning alcoholic,only to myself though-others had no idea.My abuse of alcohol lasted 34 years except for the 3 times I mentioned it was non-stop.

Are you an alcoholic?Only you can decide if you have a problem,

I have found out that I damaged my liver through alcohol, I have now been sober for 376 days but this time I don't intend to ever drink alcohol again.My health isn't worth it.

Denise