I think my partner has a problem with beer but he doesn't think so.

[samxcx]

My partner drinks everyday, he has lost jobs cause he been too hungover to get up, he has started drinking whilst walking the streets, he spent our last money on beer, he lends money to buy beer, he get's moody when he dont have none and he has been arrested for fighting and for been abusive to me trashing our house infront of our 5 year old when he's been drunk.
He dont drink loads....well about 8 tins of larger and whatever else he buy's from shop and drinks on the way back so I dont see. But I know all the tricks my Dad is an alcoholic and I grew up with him been an alcoholic.
I dont know what to do about my partner I am so worried about him, his mum passed away 4 year ago from alcohol (liver failure) and I dont want to loose him.
I have come to the final straw with him I through him out for stealing money off me to buy beer but he gave me the Im going to kill myself and I knew he had no where to go so I gave in let him back and he has made promises that he giving up but he has not he is still drinking and hiding it but I can smell it on his breathe. I really dont know what to do to help him he really dont see he got a problem he just say's his brothers drink same as him.
What can I do I cant live with him like this and I love him too much to walk away please help anyone.

[ibizan]

as usual boogie is dispensing very sound been there advice!u would benefit urself to follow thru with his suggestions!

[boogieman]

hello. sometimes the best thing to do is the hardest. there seems to be little doubt as to the existence of a problem, but the solution may require actions that are difficult. the fact of the matter is, your partner is on a suicide mission as long as he continues to drink if he's anything like i was when i began having 'life' problems (negative effects on work, finances, relationships). one of the worst things about addiction is the effects it has on those close to the afflicted person. it's usually the ones that love us that we hurt the most. as addicts (for me alcohol is no different from any other drug), we take others hostage by manipulation and making them feel guilty for not giving in to our pleas. once the line has been crossed, the drug becomes our motivation, our master, and our higher power. threats of suicide should be taken seriously, and referred to the proper authorities (i don't know about the uk, but in the us, suicidal people can be involuntarily committed for evaluation--as happened to me). as long as others made it easy for me to do what i wanted, i continued to self destruct, and almost succeeded. i would highly recommend contacting alcoholics anonymous and/or al-anon (both aa and al-anon have uk websites and meetings in your area) and share your situation with them. there you will find people who have been through the same problems (from both perspectives) and will be glad to help you both. there is a way out. take care---gm