Korsakoff's Syndrome

[Aprylzfool]

Hello, my mom was recently diagnosed with Amnesic Confabulatory Syndrome, also known as Korsakoff's as I have been told.

I was wondering if there are any support groups or resources I can find in order to help her. She's starting to become depressed about her situation (no drinking/no driving) and we don't know how to help her get back at least some portion of her life, or what kinds of activities she can and should be allowed to resume (driving, working, etc). We're flying blind basically.

Everything I have found online, with regards to support groups, directs me to alcoholism-related areas. This is not (currently) the problem though. We need support/knowledge as it relates to her capabilities and lifestyle accomodations, etc.

Thanks for any help you can offer.

Best wishes to everyone.

[ibizan]

ur doing the best u can for her...she MUST do 4 herself if she WANTS 2 get better..this u know.u take good care of urself.....have something u enjoy in life.please keep me/us posted!ur in my prayers!

[Aprylzfool]

Little to no food plus about 6+ drinks per day for several months and what can you expect really? Her liver enzymes were initially very high too but we got them down with the sobriety and nutrients and general better health. We're pretty sure the alcohol was to help with the stomach pain that is now under control. We can't be too careful since she does have an addictive personality (previous long-term drug use) but she seems to be doing ok. It's the lack of independence/mobility that seems to bother her the most.

I'll get by... always will, hopefully always will. Thanks for all your help. The hardest part has been not knowing where to go for help. Everything points me to alcoholism support groups but, like I said, we need more help in the day to day living. Wish me luck!

[ibizan]

i have dual degree....23 yrs.sober/clean myself and alcohol/drug counselor day job.have seen some korsakov's in people MUCH older than ur mom...geez 47!holymoly!understand u feelings bout 12 step support groups.what do u do 2 relax?what brings u enjoyment?have some good friends that r a support 2 u?one?two?more is good!Go grandma!she sound like a very cool loving woman like u!

[Aprylzfool]

My mother is 47, grandmother will be 83 in January. She's a pretty tough lady herself... still works part time in a toy store. Thank goodness I have her, otherwise I don't know what I'd do. I would like to do a support group but I'm not comfortable with the 12-step program based ones which unfortunately most of them are.

The fiance is not a drinker... but he avoids conflict at all costs. This seems to include putting in the necessary effort to help her. He'll make sure she takes her vitamins and whatnot but he goes to work about 12 hours/day usually 6 days/week. So she is left alone a lot. My grandmother and I could take care of her if she was living at my grandmother's house but neither of us feel comfortable taking care of her in that house with the smoke, clutter, and crazy roommate. I refuse to jeopardize our health, particularly if she will do nothing for herself.

So I guess we wait for the doctors to give us more, and to see what level she settles into, and whether or not her fiance will stick around. Or maybe he'll just continue to avoid the reality of her situation and this will continue on interminably.

Thanks for your input... how do you know about Korsakoff's?

[ibizan]

how old is ur mother?ur grandmother cares for her 2?shouldn't that be the other way around?u r ACOA-adult child of alcoholic...sounds like ur the caretaker...who takes care of u?i hope u begin to take care of yourself for u can only go so far with her.Korsakovs does some brain damage...u will see the longer she stays sober the true xtent.U need to continue to give her that tough love..if not her illness will devour u and it sounds like in many ways it has to some xtent but u r putting the skids 2 it!U need a support group for yourself.....hope u have supportive people around u!if not there is a lot of support here...she is MOST fortunate to have u and grandma around!fiance sounds like a piece of work....does he drink too or did?classic enabling there!ignorance is bliss 2 some...not to u grandma or I!:)))))))

[Aprylzfool]

Thanks for the info. She hasn't had any alcohol since she first went to the doctor so the substance abuse isn't as much an issue right this second anyhow. Previously she was in substance abuse programs for drug use so she knows the drill. Now we're in the aftermath role of keeping off the alcohol and making sure she is eating well and getting her thiamine. She actually has her stomach problem under control now (she has some medication that is working, finally!) She was a bartender and had some stomach issues so she wasn't eating because everything she ate came back up. She should have gone to the doctor but was stubborn and childish. So the only calories she was getting really came from alcohol. We figure the alcohol made the stomach pain more bearable and kept her from having to acknowledge her other health problems. This all added up to malnutrition, which added to the alcohol has brought us to her current situation.

I'm going to contact her doctor to determine the extent of her specific case and the limitations we should put in place for her recovery, though I know statistics show 25% make no recovery whatsoever. I'm hoping she's part of the other 75% that recover at least partially, if not close to fully.

So the point we are at now is figuring just how independent she can be, both now and after the period where any progress would have already shown itself.

She doesn't do very much for herself right now, and mostly stays in bed (hence the depression I mentioned before). She wants to "regain her life"... I'm trying to encourage her to live a bit more healthfully at home first... maybe move around and get some form of exercise both for body and mind. Her fiance is no help either. He seems to think that things will magically heal themselves and does nothing to try to get her to do more for herself, let alone make healthier choices beyond making her eat. My grandmother is the only one who goes down and makes sure she's doing her foot baths and exercises (for a foot issue she has). Otherwise she really would be bedridden. It also doesn't help that they are both smokers and I can hardly stand to step foot in the house because of the lingering smoke and residue. I have allergies, and have a strong sense of smell so I am very sensitive to the environment there.

My grandmother and I are trying to figure out how best to help her when she and her fiance don't seem willing to put in the effort to actually do something about her condition. We feel like our hands are tied. Part of us just wants her fiance to break things off so she can move back home with her mom, my grandmother. I would then move there as well to help take care of her. I'd rather that than live in this limbo.

The saddest part is that she has done it all to herself. In many ways she is like a child who is upset because he can't have his way but she made the choices that led up to this. For most of my life I have been more of the parent to her child, so I can't help but resent the fact that her poor life choices always affect me in some way. But she's still my mother and I have to help her however I can, even if that means tough love.

Sorry for the length... I think I just had to let off some steam.

Thanks Again!

[ibizan]

Wow ur mom was a very heavy drinker..Korsakov's is hell!for her and u!Whatever county u reside in has a outpatient substance abuse facility.Contact them maybe set up appointment with good licensed substance abuse counselor and inquire as to support groups.No doubt your mom has a multitude of medical issues first needing resolved in order for her to be able to function on a daily basis.Her doctor is the best one to advise on readiness to drive...or not for her own and other safety.If she has craving for alcohol Campral is very good.Google this for more info.best of luck,,please keep us posted!