Liz is definitely right! We are 1000% here for u... Recovery is extremely difficult... I've had tons of struggles with it... I don't mean to come off harsh and have NO idea why my post was in all caps either. Idk what CAS is but I'm sure it's designed to help you guys... Best of luck to you...any update on things?? Are u ok?
I hope you're alright and are not thinking that we are not supporting you or understanding how you feel. We do know how much work you had to have put in to get clean for 9 months. You've done a great job. There is no shame in relapsing and having to retweak your program girl.
Please let us know how you are after your meeting. You will handle anything that CAS puts in front of you. You just need some relapse prevention work .
You're in my thoughts and prayers. I'm just down the street from you. LIz
All of this is in place to protect your children, yourself, and your husband. CAS is working with you and relapse happens , often
there's a program in place for you to always be at your best when with the kids, down the road (as was my experience) you will respect the fact that you were held at being your best while in the company of your kids at least.
I initiated blood/urine testing every second day for 2 years for full custody
I was glad to do it, to prove to myself I was capable of parenting with my disease.
Are you involved with AA? Do you have a sponsor? As far as I'm concerned you are far more likely at risk of relapse if you don't have a good sponsor, a home group, and many closed same sex meetings.
There's no shame to have been given to much too soon with your kids.
WHAT IS CAS? SORRY FOR MY IGNORANCE! IS THAT A CHILD PROTECTION AGENCY? I HAVE COMPASSION AND EMPATHY FOR YOU BECAUSE I KNOW YOUR AN ADDICT AND I KNOW HOW TOUGH RECOVERY CAN BE BUT I MUST SAY THAT I THINK YOUR HUSBAND DID THE RIGHT THING. I'M CERTAINLY NOT TRYING TO HURT YOU BY SAYING THAT BUT HE HAS TO PUT THE CHILDREN FIIRST AS A MAIN PRIORITY. TO MANY PEOPLE DONT. YOUR BABIES DESERVE A CLEAN, HEALTHY MOTHER. AND IF YOU ARE DRUNK WHILE CARING FOR YOUR CHILDREN IT DOES PUT THEM AT RISK NO MATTER HOW YOU SLICE IT OR DICE IT. IN CASE OF EMERGENCY COULD YOU GET THEM TO THE HOSPITAL WHILE DRUNK? WOULD YOU BE ABLE TO REACT IN A COZIGNANT MANNER? PLEASE KEEP US UPDATED AND MY THOUGHTS AND PRAYERS ARE WITH YOU AND YOUR FAMILY! FOR YOURSELF AND YOUR FAMILY YOUR RECOVERY SHOULD BE YOUR MAIN FOCAL POINT! BEST OF LUCK TO YOU!
I'm sorry for Your pain but I must say - Your Husband is doing the right thing in putting the Children FIRST.
I don't say this without deep compassion for You, but none the less, I must say - You were not putting the Children first "last Wednesday when You drank that one time only". You CHOSE to but the alcohol first at the risk of the Children and YourSelf as well. Your Husband is doing the right thing.
You think You don't put the Children at risk when You drink, but You do. This I know is true. My own Mother was an alcoholic from the time I was born, so: This I Know Is True!!
It's good, very, very good that You are signed up for regular blood tests but I note that You say You are not willing to be "put in this position again". You must realize that You were not "put in this position", rather You placed YourSelf in this position. As part of Your recovery, You must realize Your own responsibility for Your own poor decision to drink again. In order to make changes, addiction or otherwise, we MUST take responsibility and own Our decisions.
Good Luck. I Wish Recovery for You and Your Children and Your Husband I Wish this from the Bottom of My Heart.