but i didn't want to

[ellie917]

A year and a half ago,my husband decided I was drinking too much andIi had to quit. Ii stopped, I was unhappy, But I will admit I had been going at it little heavy for a while.  Ii was angry about being left alone. He owned a livery business and said things would be different after he no longer  had it.  Well, he gave it to our son and now he is 'helping' him, and it is status quo.  I want my wine again, I have learned my lesson, and could be trusted to have control.  My husband quit cold trukey almost 25 years ago and thinks I should be fine with it, Well that runied our social life.  He says "now you know how I  felt" (without drinking).  As time goes on I am getting very angry about the whole thing and feeling hostile and am short with him.   we are married almost 40 years  I am i am feeling very trapped. He has taken bossinessands and control to a new level...

[dominosarah]

Your husband loved you enough to see you were going down a very deadly road.  Now you need to see that also.  There is no going back to controlled drinking.  Once we have crossed that line that control thing is gone.  Our self esteem takes a beating and we think that the alcohol will make us feel better.  You dont have to rely on a bottle to make you happy.  Happiness comes from within and we have to find that.  Have you thought about talking to a counselor or going to AA?  I have found great fellowship and a fun social life being sober.  There is whole world out there waiting for you.  Congrats on 40 yrs of marriage.  That is something to be proud of.

[17mthssober275]

Congratulations on quitting drinking and don't start again. You are feeling resentments right now and that is making you want to drink. Try going to a AA meeting in your area and meet some sober friends, it'll help to talk about your feelings and you will feel better. You need to get into AA for  support for yourself. The twelve steps of AA will help you get away from your anger and start feeling positive about yourself. Thats a long comitted marraige, something to be proud of. You need to have your own self also, something you will get when you walk into those doors. I have also been sober 18 months and life is getting better and I go to meetings and have other people to talk to, someone who understands me, it's such a good feeling. Be strong and stay sober!!